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struggles_inc

struggles_inc

life is a highway and i wanna wreck my car
Jun 24, 2023
476
I lost vision in my left eye.
I've been having daily IV drips and my veins hurt.
It's painful to read and write. To move, too.
Doctors suspect something in my brain.
My life is falling apart. My business is stalled because of my condition. My family is in panic.
I wish I was dead already.
 
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fadedghost

fadedghost

Found SaSu after reading BBC & watching YouTube
Dec 10, 2025
742
I lost vision in my left eye.
I've been having daily IV drips and my veins hurt.
It's painful to read and write. To move, too.
Doctors suspect something in my brain.
My life is falling apart. My business is stalled because of my condition. My family is in panic.
I wish I was dead already.
What is in the IV drips?

Why do they merely suspect something and not know?

I am surprised they wouldn't do a CT scan immediately if you lost vision and need IV drips.
 
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struggles_inc

struggles_inc

life is a highway and i wanna wreck my car
Jun 24, 2023
476
What is in the IV drips?

Why do they merely suspect something and not know?

I am surprised they wouldn't do a CT scan immediately if you lost vision and need IV drips.
They scheduled an MRI at the end of this week. I suppose there's waiting time, so the clinic said that they need to start treatment before they know for sure. They found inflammation of the ocular nerve, and they want to take my spinal fluid after the MRI. There's some anti-inflammatory stuff in the IV.
They're not telling me what it is even though I asked. "Something with the brain" is all I got.
 
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Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
13,485
This is so horrible what you have to go through.
I really hope there's a cure for it and there's a treatment for this condition. 🫂
 
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struggles_inc

struggles_inc

life is a highway and i wanna wreck my car
Jun 24, 2023
476
This is so horrible what you have to go through.
I really hope there's a cure for it and there's a treatment for this condition. 🫂
Thank you do much.
The ironic part is that it all began after I started wanting to live. I opted out of suicide two years ago and just ended up in this.
 
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Enyan

Enyan

Sad Catgirl
May 19, 2026
118
They found inflammation of the ocular nerve, and they want to take my spinal fluid after the MRI
I hope I'm not stepping too out of line, but I just wanted you to know that a spinal tap can lead to a completely debilitating, hard to fix and sometimes life-long spinal fluid leak (bedbound, brain fog, memory loss, vision issues, etc.) The doctors usually only mention it as "oh, you can get a headache for a week or two, and if it doesn't go away you'll get a patch and it'll be all fine again". I'm gonna CTB anytime within the next two months because it happened to me, wasn't a single ounce of suicidal before that. They even used an atraumatic needle which has the lowest incidence rate, nope, still got it.

I don't wanna stress you if they think it's absolutely medically necessary and they don't have any alternative - the chances that it'll happen to you are abysmally small, even more so if you're a guy (no clue why there's a gender difference), but I do at least want you to know stuff like that can happen. Had I been informed of that kinda stuff beforehand I'd not be here now.

Hope you'll feel better soon.
 
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struggles_inc

struggles_inc

life is a highway and i wanna wreck my car
Jun 24, 2023
476
I hope I'm not stepping too out of line, but I just wanted you to know that a spinal tap can lead to a completely debilitating, hard to fix and sometimes life-long spinal fluid leak (bedbound, brain fog, memory loss, vision issues, etc.) The doctors usually only mention it as "oh, you can get a headache for a week or two, and if it doesn't go away you'll get a patch and it'll be all fine again". I'm gonna CTB anytime within the next two months because it happened to me, wasn't a single ounce of suicidal before that. They even used an atraumatic needle which has the lowest incidence rate, nope, still got it.

I don't wanna stress you if they think it's absolutely medically necessary and they don't have any alternative - the chances that it'll happen to you are abysmally small, even more so if you're a guy (no clue why there's a gender difference), but I do at least want you to know stuff like that can happen. Had I been informed of that kinda stuff beforehand I'd not be here now.

Hope you'll feel better soon.
Thank you so much. I was actually going to refuse spinal puncture because my mother started crying on the phone when she heard about it, and I suppose now I know why.

I am extremely sorry that happened to you. God, I am so sorry.
 
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fadedghost

fadedghost

Found SaSu after reading BBC & watching YouTube
Dec 10, 2025
742
Thank you so much. I was actually going to refuse spinal puncture because my mother started crying on the phone when she heard about it, and I suppose now I know why.

I am extremely sorry that happened to you. God, I am so sorry.

Spinal taps are horrible, but you need to do the spinal tap. If they are ordering a spinal tap, it's for a reason, like testing for the presence of certain things that can only be done by spinal tap. It's standard medical procedure in certain cases and there are reasons they do it. Look, you lost vision in 1 eye, this may be something that the IV fluids alone may treat, but it may not be, and they need to do those tests to know.

The rate of serious spinal tap injury is 1/10,000 and most likely, you'll be fine. There's a chance your medical situation is just limited to your eye (optic neuritis) but it may not be, it's a bigger risk to not do the spinal tap. Listen to your doctors on this and play the odds on this (ie, very very unlikely to have serious spinal tap injury, extremely likely to have a disease that that needs treatment and a correct diagnosis which can't be determined without a spinal tap).
 
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