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- Feb 20, 2024
- 36
At 12AM today I'm just going to walk out of my house and try to at least drown in a river near my town or something. Today kind of gave me a realization that no one in my life really cares unless it's too late, but I guess that's just people in general. Also this is a pretty emotional post rn so I'm not genuinely sure if I'm going to get out and do it, but the desire to is there. I'm at least going to try to cbt once tonight. I've been trying so hard recently to try and think on the positive things and get rid of my negative mindset (reconnecting to my old religion and things that used to be enjoyable for me and whatnot) but I'm just so tired emotionally and I don't care about trying anymore at this point with all of the bullshit in my life and living with people that don't give a damn about me. I don't have anything special to say as a goodbye since I don't know anyone here, but life can go fuck itself.