Lots of people on here appear to want to die: Do you have any diagnoses? Physical or psychological, which is making you want to CTB?

[usernameforhere]

Good luck on your Journey, I'm going soon too. Are we allowed to ask someone what their method is going to be?

I'd rather not post mine publicly but I'll see if I can send you a message.

ive been have a wicked awful time with my kidneys as well. I wonder how common this is as a adjunct.

 

[Moose.000]

Lyme disease, hemolytic anemia, chronic migraines and cluster headaches, spinal narrowing with chronic back and neck pain, major depressive disorder, (DiD)dissociative identity disorder, PTSD. Fun fun fun!

 

[BandAddict]

PTSD, Schizoaffective Disorder, depressive type, eating disorder, and anxiety for mental illnesses/diagnoses.

Tardive Dyskinesia for physical.

 

[Pen>Sword]

I've got none of that, but I think I have undiagnosed depression and a case of stupidity. Yes, I admit that I'm stupid.

 

[ForNow]

Yes -- lupus SLE, migraines mixed (apparently) with seizures, and major recurring depression. Lupus is just kicking my ass anymore, and I'm hypersensitive to the toxic meds that are supposed to "treat" the flares, chronic pain, and inflammation that come with it. The pain is getting worse, so is the fatigue, vital organs, and why linger on with chronic fatigue and I'd need daily painkillers just to manage life? When I'm finished what I have to do in this life, I am figuring out my way to ctb. If lupus doesn't kill me first, that is ....

 

[filthyrottendirty]

autism (I'm a retarded subhuman)

 

[Hurt]

Both. I'm physically and psychologically fucked up.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

physical: Neurotoxicity/ CNS damage
emotional: CPTSD

 

[Rayzieka]

Schizophrenia here, along with anxiety and major depressive disorder. And apparently, since a few days ago I'm being treated for OCD as well...
Never thought I'd be diagnosed with OCD. But I guess I also never thought I had schizophrenia until my friend made me go in and he told them everything I'd been doing.
I always knew something was different but I believed it was real.

 

[poisonedminds]

I've been diagnosed with BPD, anorexia and anxiety.
I also have physical problems from my ED, like hypokalemia, gastroparesis, low bp, etc., which are very debilitating.

My suicidal thoughts are mainly caused by an existential crisis and my eating disorder.

 

[heretogethelp]

I have BPD, generalized anxiety disorder and major depression :(
I'm currently on Zyprexa, an anti-emetic, and Prozac.

 

[deletednumber]

Severe depression, which involves perennial physical and mental fatigue, social anxiety, fear of everything, inability to do easier tasks, obsessive hatred towards my body and my person, anger attacks in which I self-harm (mostly generated by behavior of my family's shit), very powerful and painful depressive crises in which I feel short of breath and I feel very severe pain in my chest. Inability to feel joy. Basically this depression has taken everything away from me although it is not considered a "real" disease, at least here.An amoeba is more productive than me. I have seen psychiatrists, psychologists, I have taken drugs, I have also been voluntarily a month in the psychiatry ward. A psychiatrist of the ward told me exactly these words, after telling him that I have suicidal instincts: "If you really want to kill yourself, we'll give you a knife and you'll kill yourself." -.- The drugs worsened the situation by far, I was always stoned, I could not see well ... and in short, here I am.

 

[victoria91]

No official diagnosis with anything but I know something is very wrong with me. Depression and or personality disorder of some sort I think.

I've never really enjoyed life for as long as I can remember and what I use made of my life is horrendous I'm just a pure failure and embarrassment really

 

[MrAsclepius]

I would hope that if someone was on here and considering suicide they would seek a professional diagnosis first. I've been diagnosed with ptsd, major depressive, bipolar, anxiety, insomnia. i am physically disfigured due to an inherited disease, you can tell who i am from a mile away because of it.

 

[logan]

I have exclusively psychological problems.
A bipolar disorder, a little authism and lifelong synaesthesia.
Until about 2 years ago, everything was "good" so far.
Then certain life circumstances led to an internal and external escalation.
And in the end I completely lost my zest for life and energy.

 

[rvsw]

Bedridden with severe pelvic pain for.5 years. Having this condition for 24 years but managed it somehow until jan 2020

 

[Snatsbats]

A autoimmune disease called Mast Cell Activation Syndrom. My body is litterally flooded with allergic reaction antibodies. The symptoms are unbearable. I feel tired and numb all day long, my skin feels like I've been rolling in nettles for an hour and intestines are always inflamed, my muscles, especially in my neck and shoulders, are always stiff and i cant fucking concentrate anymore on anything. Its been 6 years and its only gotten worse.

I just want it to be over.

 

[NormaJeane]

Why ask about it - we are all going to die eventually so most people will end up here anyway.

 

[Largeletters]

My diagnoses: Major Depressive Disorder (MDD), OCD, Unspecified Anxiety.

 

[Scribble Fan]

I was diagnosed with PTSD, General Anxiety Disorder, and Major Depressive Disorder. They make life a living hell.

 

[Lost Magic]

Hmm, let me think: Severe depression, death of close loved ones, loneliness, existential crisis, body dysmorphia, society sucks and those are just to name a few things. Life is pain with only moments of bliss. And those moments are fleeting and few and far between. Just let me die already.

 

[Myforevercharlie]

I'm one of the few here who don't want to CTB
I've been diagnosed with BPD, PTSS, anxiety disorder, depression and ADHD.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Major depressive disorder, undiagnosed asperger's, anxiety, digestive issues, scarring alopecia folliculitis decalvans, major anhedonia.

the scarring alopecia that i have is painful and ugly looking. It is been my major contributor to me wanting to ctb. Started when I was 16. Now i am 36. It hasnt been as bad as before but it still there and there is no cure for it

 

[Dear Agony]

Psychological. I'm officially diagnosed with BPD, OCD, agoraphobia, depression and an eating disorder. On assessment for another personality disorder. These have ruined my life, but I don't blame it on my illnesses alone.

 

[innocent21]

I have bipolar but I've had mild depression from age 7 due to an existential crisis and still have it now. Why? That would be long to explain.

 

[Rae82]

Empty nose syndrome. Can't feel my breathing, mucosa has atrophied and is dry. It's hell with every breath.

 

[Cant go back]

Severe depression, which involves perennial physical and mental fatigue, social anxiety, fear of everything, inability to do easier tasks, obsessive hatred towards my body and my person, anger attacks in which I self-harm (mostly generated by behavior of my family's shit)

My spouse experiences a lot of these, especially the anger attacks because of families shit. Sometimes I think that if my family weren't causing shit, my spouse would be fine and then I would be fine.

 

[deletednumber]

My spouse experiences a lot of these, especially the anger attacks because of families shit. Sometimes I think that if my family weren't causing shit, my spouse would be fine and then I would be fine.

I'm very sorry for your spouse...yes it's true,if my family helped me instead of continuing to put the knife in the wound then I would have saved myself 80% of the suffering.Shitty families :(

 

[Seiba]

I was diagnosed with ADHD and depression when I was a child. Generalized anxiety was listed as a problem by a GP, and I was quite anxious but I only noticed that because it was listed as a problem on the sheet and never said to me in person so I'm not sure how valid that diagnosis is. Sorry to hear about the diagnosis everyone else has as well. Well on the depression bit I was just put on SSRIs so I'm not fully sure, but I'd imagine being put on medication for your mood that is an SSRI would entail being diagnosed with that.

 

[MZ18]

I know this is an old thread so I may be talking to the ether. I am a 37 year old male. I have dry eye to the point that my cornea is literally falling apart Painfully. Up untill 7 months ago I had no idea what true pain was. I do now. I now have severe PTSD and I've been wanting to ctb for a while now (SI is a hell of a thing), anyways just wanted to kinda get this off my chest. I live with my mom since my dad died a few years ago shes 72 and healthy as a horse I wish I got those genes. I am planning on Next week for my ctb I'm going to use SN and she is supportive and understands why Im doing this. Thanks for listening