Severe depression, which involves perennial physical and mental fatigue, social anxiety, fear of everything, inability to do easier tasks, obsessive hatred towards my body and my person, anger attacks in which I self-harm (mostly generated by behavior of my family's shit), very powerful and painful depressive crises in which I feel short of breath and I feel very severe pain in my chest. Inability to feel joy. Basically this depression has taken everything away from me although it is not considered a "real" disease, at least here.An amoeba is more productive than me. I have seen psychiatrists, psychologists, I have taken drugs, I have also been voluntarily a month in the psychiatry ward. A psychiatrist of the ward told me exactly these words, after telling him that I have suicidal instincts: "If you really want to kill yourself, we'll give you a knife and you'll kill yourself." -.- The drugs worsened the situation by far, I was always stoned, I could not see well ... and in short, here I am.