Life HURTS

[shampoo sniffer]

Bit of background about me: I'm an autistic female with a history of trauma. I've never wanted kids and I've always been that way. I had a panic attack today, thinking about how I'm not really female because I have no maternal instinct. And then I started thinking about how I'm going to be alone when I get old.

I've never been in a relationship but I don't think any man would be interested in me since I have a lot of trauma around sexual matters. And most men want kids these days.

My anxiety has gotten so bad recently that I can't even turn to my hobbies to distract myself. I'm getting panic attacks every day, several times a day.

I wish so, so much that the UK had MAID. I know I'd get it before I turn 40 and my parents pass. I want to get SN but I don't know where to go to get it.

I hate this, I'm being kept here against my will. I just want a peaceful death. I pray every night that I'll develop some kind of terminal illness.

 

[Wolf Girl]

Maternal instinct isn't required to be female, just like paternal instinct is not a requirement to be male.

You shouldn't give up on dating if it's something you want. There are men who also have sexual trauma and men who are asexual and men who are simply patient enough to be with a partner with sexual trauma.