Venting Lets say i tried to ctb

[SapoMotoqueiro]

And i am struggling a lot to pass out, maybe i just cant tolerate the pain, i am very upset, scared, tired and anxious, maybe i will try it again some hours but uuuughhhhhhhhgghh i love being incompetent. idk if i should talk about it with somebody, man i want to be taken care of but i am soooo scared what they could do to me. i could even loss the only friend i have!

My method is partial hanging using the bed headboard as anchor.

 

[getoutgirl]

Hey.
I'm sorry you are struggling.
I don't know your personal situation or circumstances either, but maybe if you'd also want to talk about it with somebody... that's something you should consider instead. Because it doesn't sound like you are getting much help or have tried it. I might be wrong, I can't know, but if so, keeping this all to yourself feels like hell, it is asphyxiating and scary and makes dying seem like the only option. I know that. So maybe consider your options, dedicate some time to jusut breathing and thinking it through. It is not much worth it to attempt while as anxious and scared as you say you are at the moment, not the best idea...
I know it's hard and it gets desperate, but you also have time if you end up doing this, so take what you need. If you need to talk I'm around and other people too, don't hesitate to reach out, here at least it's a safe space, vent what you want, irl you judge yourself out of the people you know.
In any case again I'm sorry you are feeling all that at the moment. Big hugs <3