I've done something like this myself; had cut ties with almost everyone that I considered family, in the hopes that it would help them more easily handle certain things that I at the time believed would come up in their lives, along with hoping that it would overall change said lives for the better.
I don't know yet if it'll actually help them cope with said things that may happen sooner or later. I also don't know if me essentially disappearing from their lives has actually improved them either. In fact I have more reasons to think that it may have actually screwed up some of their lives, and am barely really comprehending the gravity of what I've done.
At the end of the day though, I've accepted that the decision to CTB will always be inherently selfish of me and will undoubtedly damage those I care about. Suicide may be a noble choice for some, but is not and will not ever be for me if it's being done in the way I've planned for it to happen. The true noble decision would have been to give every existing form of essence that makes up my life to become the person who fixes not only my own life, but also the lives of the ones I claim to care about and love. And if I can't fix them despite all of the sacrifices made, then at least must do all that I can to help them, yet I instead desire to take my own life and to escape my own suffering despite fully knowing that it will cause much of the same onto everyone else.
But honesty? I totally get your sentiment. At times we really may be uneeded baggage to everyone we know in our lives, and those people will rarely ever admit it. But the funniest thing is the fact that many of them would be happier to keep that useless baggage in their lives regardless, so I guess at least some of us aren't totally useless after all?
surprisingly I don't think that for my friends, they really love me but yeah sometimes I feel like none of the people in my family love me except my little sister
