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AshClouds

AshClouds

In time I started growing inward.
Apr 10, 2023
328
I've been constantly daydreaming about offing myself recently.
It usually involves a gun (most effective method) and shooting myself through my mouth into my brain.
I keep thinking about what my corpse would look like, and thinking that this is what the "end of all my problems" would look like.
Sometimes I imagine jumping off a cliff, or tying weights to my body and drowning myself. Other times I daydream about using a combination
of various methods to finish the task.
Its not normal to think this, but it always hits my mind. I used to daydream about having a happy life eventually, but I can't picture that anymore even if I tried.

I still picture my suicide even when I'm least depressed.
sometimes I daydream about dying in an accident, getting run over by a bus, getting hit by a drunk driver, or driving off a ledge,
and I start thinking that it wouldn't be such a bad thing if that happened to me. All my problems would be over and I wouldn't have to deal with them anymore.

I don't know, I'm sure some of you do the same.
 
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Unwr!tten

Unwr!tten

Saltier than SN
Apr 10, 2023
531
I have this same daydream, but for me, it's with SN. I imagine writing the letters, sending the 3mails. I imagine listening to music as I drift off and then I imagine my body being found and the aftermath. It's very comforting in many ways to me, so I get you.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,715
I'm always thinking about suicide, for me it makes so much sense to daydream about suicide when suicide literally solves what I see as being the true problem which is existence in itself and removes all suffering, the thing that is appealing to me about suicide is that it's taking control over my inevitable fate, we are all destined to die anyway so I would prefer to be in control of when I leave. I envy those who free themselves from this dreadful existence.
 
Worndown

Worndown

Illuminated
Mar 21, 2019
3,718
That is not uncommon. There is a lot to think about and that is a good way to do it.
 
B

Badatlove

Member
Dec 4, 2019
21
On the way to the coffeeshop to get some weed, I crossed the highway so hundreds of cars pass by right under me. Felt that physical urge the jump and get mashed in those speed crossing cars. Brain is definitely creative whole day to find many ways to ctb..
 
Redhat83

Redhat83

Rio:))
Jun 3, 2023
20
I feel that but for me it's a reoccurring fantasy about being found dead in a public toilet usually by hanging or by cutting my wrists I just find so much comfort in going the through the steps of exactly what I would do in my mine living every small detail in my head I must've gone through it hundreds of times now but the ending changes sometimes I feel myself getting weaker and my blood draining and I close my eyes and it's black and that's it sometimes I'm out of my body watching the reactions of other people finding me sometimes I get found and saved just in time sometimes I wake up with people around me in a hospital bed. I think I really do crave the attention at the same time as genuinely wanting to die sometimes at the same time sometimes at different times idk is wanting attention really so bad?
 
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outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,866
I've been constantly daydreaming about offing myself recently.
It usually involves a gun (most effective method) and shooting myself through my mouth into my brain.
I keep thinking about what my corpse would look like, and thinking that this is what the "end of all my problems" would look like.
Sometimes I imagine jumping off a cliff, or tying weights to my body and drowning myself. Other times I daydream about using a combination
of various methods to finish the task.
Its not normal to think this, but it always hits my mind. I used to daydream about having a happy life eventually, but I can't picture that anymore even if I tried.

I still picture my suicide even when I'm least depressed.
sometimes I daydream about dying in an accident, getting run over by a bus, getting hit by a drunk driver, or driving off a ledge,
and I start thinking that it wouldn't be such a bad thing if that happened to me. All my problems would be over and I wouldn't have to deal with them anymore.

I don't know, I'm sure some of you do the same.
'Its not normal to think this' I dunno, seems normal to me
 
leftdreaming

leftdreaming

I should’ve been a house cat
Apr 28, 2023
170
I daydream too, but mine include people who actively want to help me and me failing them. They aren't real, though, just a nice thought.
 
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bellinda

bellinda

Member
May 29, 2023
27
I had that except it was a result of taking abilify (an antipsychotic). The daydreams were out of my control completely, extreme, and often caused me real life obsessions. Every minute I would think of a new way I can kill myself, whether by opening the car's door in a dangerous speedy highway, or by adding a big dose of aspirin so that when I cut my vein that I bleed out faster. It was the fucking worst. They stopped when I stopped taking abilify, or slowly lowered in how frequent they were until it stopped.
 
CigaretteAesthetics

CigaretteAesthetics

i have never been so happy
Apr 28, 2023
13
I've been constantly daydreaming about offing myself recently.
It usually involves a gun (most effective method) and shooting myself through my mouth into my brain.
I keep thinking about what my corpse would look like, and thinking that this is what the "end of all my problems" would look like.
Sometimes I imagine jumping off a cliff, or tying weights to my body and drowning myself. Other times I daydream about using a combination
of various methods to finish the task.
Its not normal to think this, but it always hits my mind. I used to daydream about having a happy life eventually, but I can't picture that anymore even if I tried.

I still picture my suicide even when I'm least depressed.
sometimes I daydream about dying in an accident, getting run over by a bus, getting hit by a drunk driver, or driving off a ledge,
and I start thinking that it wouldn't be such a bad thing if that happened to me. All my problems would be over and I wouldn't have to deal with them anymore.

I don't know, I'm sure some of you do the same.
me too. its always there, whether im doing better or doing worse. it was there when i thought i was going to find love and everything was gonna be alright, and it was obviously still there when everything fell through.

that's just me over sharing though. its kinda satisfying to think about. sometimes its pretty and picturesque in my mind, sometimes i think about it more somberly. most times i use a gun, but sometimes i think about drifting off or hanging.
 
woh6

woh6

Student
May 13, 2023
187
That's normal. I daydream usually about hanging, or getting into an accident. Sometimes I draw to process the thoughts.
 

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