I've just met a suicidal woman in the streets (insane story !)

[unluckysadness]

I've just met a random woman in the street who talked me about her suicidal thoughts and she thinks it's a normal thing. It's just crazy ! This is what happened :

I just went out to send a little parcel and in front of the locker, a woman said to me "hey, you cannot park here". I have an electric bike but I didn't see that I was on a handicapped parking spot. I said "okay, but I'm disabled". Then she said "oh sorry, I'm disabled too". And I've explained my disabilities and she said how much it must be difficult for me. I said "yes, I can maybe ride only 1 kilometer because of my spasms and pain". And we talked like that during 15-20 minutes.

Then she said : "anyway, if things get worse for my bad health, I'll take my car and go directly into a tree". My brain didn't instantly understand what just happened. It was : "man, is this woman telling me she's suicidal ?"... Then she explained me why suicide is a normal thing when you suffer too much. WOW !! So destabilizing !...

I was thinking : "should I tell her about my plans ?" I mean, there were people around us (it was in front of a supermarket). Then I thought "oh shit, I'll tell her about my plans for Switzerland, I have nothing to lose, she talked about her thought so I can do it too". Insane. I just shared my plans to a RANDOM woman in the street. And she told me again that it's a normal a responsible thing to think about how you want to die.

Then I thought about what she said about using her car to ctb. I've told her "wait, don't you fear a failed attempt and being more disabled ?". She replied : "don't worry, I know exactly how to do ! I've studied the subject !". I don't think she's here on SaSu so I can share it. I was trembling in front of her. I was thinking "wait, this discussion cannot be real". If I came just 10 seconds later, I wouldn't have met this woman... Isn't it crazy ?? She also blamed religions that claim that suicide is a sin. I told her that suicide is a death like another. She agreed.

I don't know if it's a coincidence but the parcel I've sent contains a DVD from the singer Mike Brant (who died by probable suicide - jumping). And today is the day I wanted to send my whole documents to Athanasios... So is it an approval from the universe which says to me : "you can ctb, it's okay". I'm just shocked right now...

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NOTICE FOR TEENS AND YOUNG ADULTS : I'm in my 40s and this woman is in her 50s. We are both severely DISABLED with severeal health issues that will only get worse with aging. We are aware about it. So if you are a teen or under 35, I repeat : suicide should be considered ONLY if there is no other alternative. I'm pro-choice and I don't judge anyone's choice. But if your health condition may get better, PLEASE try to recover before trying the ultimate solution called suicide. Thanks.

 

[Captive_Mind515]

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DISCLAIMER FOR TEENS AND YOUNG ADULTS : I'm in my 40s and this woman is in her 50s. We are both severely DISABLED with severeal health issues that will only get worse with aging. We are aware about it. So if you are a teen or under 35, I repeat : suicide should be considered ONLY if there is no other alternative. I'm pro-choice and I don't judge anyone's choice. But if your health condition may get better, PLEASE try to recover before trying the ultimate solution called suicide. Thanks.

Strange encounter…

But under 35? Really? That would probably be about 80-90% of members on this site…

 

[blacksand]

Tree and car is such a crazy way to go. I always wonder how many seeming accidents like that are ctb.

 

[ctb_warrior]

I've just met a random woman in the street who talked me about her suicidal thoughts and she thinks it's a normal thing. It's just crazy ! This is what happened :

I just went out to send a little parcel and in front of the locker, a woman said to me "hey, you cannot park here". I have an electric bike but I didn't see that I was on a handicapped parking spot. I said "okay, but I'm disabled". Then she said "oh sorry, I'm disabled too". And I've explained my disabilities and she said how much it must be difficult for me. I said "yes, I can maybe ride only 1 kilometer because of my spasms and pain". And we talked like that during 15-20 minutes.

Then she said : "anyway, if things get worse for my bad health, I'll take my car and go directly into a tree". My brain didn't instantly understand what just happened. It was : "man, is this woman telling me she's suicidal ?"... Then she explained me why suicide is a normal thing when you suffer too much. WOW !! So destabilizing !...

I was thinking : "should I tell her about my plans ?" I mean, there were people around us (it was in front of a supermarket). Then I thought "oh shit, I'll tell her about my plans for Switzerland, I have nothing to lose, she talked about her thought so I can do it too". Insane. I just shared my plans to a RANDOM woman in the street. And she told me again that it's a normal a responsible thing to think about how you want to die.

Then I thought about what she said about using her car to ctb. I've told her "wait, don't you fear a failed attempt and being more disabled ?". She replied : "don't worry, I know exactly how to do ! I've studied the subject !". I don't think she's here on SaSu so I can share it. I was trembling in front of her. I was thinking "wait, this discussion cannot be real". If I came just 10 seconds later, I wouldn't have met this woman... Isn't it crazy ?? She also blamed religions that claim that suicide is a sin. I told her that suicide is a death like another. She agreed.

I don't know if it's a coincidence but the parcel I've sent contains a DVD from the singer Mike Brant (who died by probable suicide - jumping). And today is the day I wanted to send my whole documents to Athanasios... So is it an approval from the universe which says to me : "you can ctb, it's okay". I'm just shocked right now...

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

NOTICE FOR TEENS AND YOUNG ADULTS : I'm in my 40s and this woman is in her 50s. We are both severely DISABLED with severeal health issues that will only get worse with aging. We are aware about it. So if you are a teen or under 35, I repeat : suicide should be considered ONLY if there is no other alternative. I'm pro-choice and I don't judge anyone's choice. But if your health condition may get better, PLEASE try to recover before trying the ultimate solution called suicide. Thanks.

That's a striking coincidence really
Well said, that people should first try to see if things can improve. Not all things lead to a dead end. Some can be solved with time and bit of patience

 

[dust-in-the-wind]

I love when stuff like that happens. It's like a message from the universe, however it is interpreted. We live in a death denying culture that believes we need to live at all costs & endure all suffering no matter how bad it is. I think the woman you met is more normal than the rest of the population. We should be contemplating our death in how we want to die because it is coming for all of us. I am very sorry for your physical sufferings. Mine are mostly mental right now, but I am 57, so the physical will be coming soon, as I have inherited a couple of poor genetic conditions. I like your disclaimer to the younger folks on here because for them it is often true things can get better, they just can't see it and often act on impulse. If I acted on impulse I would have been dead by my 20's. Despite living with severe mental illness, meds have given me years of good life in between really bad episodes. The unfortunate thing is the meds eventually stop working and you are back to the drawing board.

 

[unluckysadness]

Another coincidence (or not) yesterday evening. I have the X-Files blu ray box set and I sometimes watch an episode. There are 218 episodes, so it takes time to watch the complete series. I didn't watch any episode since maybe 2 months, but I just wanted to watch Mulder & Scully, so I put the disc into the player, the episode begins, and what is the first scene ? A woman being voluntarily euthanasied with Nembutal. WTF !?

I believe in signs, so having the same day a meeting with a random woman telling me she's suicidal and told me I have the right to ctb, the same day I wanted to send my final documents for VAD, then watching this episode which is about assisted suicide... Damn, it's maybe just a coincidence after all, but this was weird. I used to experience some paranormal things in the past, so I really think it means something.

 

[ctb_warrior]

Another coincidence (or not) yesterday evening. I have the X-Files blu ray box set and I sometimes watch an episode. There are 218 episodes, so it takes time to watch the complete series. I didn't watch any episode since maybe 2 months, but I just wanted to watch Mulder & Scully, so I put the disc into the player, the episode begins, and what is the first scene ? A woman being voluntarily euthanasied with Nembutal. WTF !?

I believe in signs, so having the same day a meeting with a random woman telling me she's suicidal and told me I have the right to ctb, the same day I wanted to send my final documents for VAD, then watching this episode which is about assisted suicide... Damn, it's maybe just a coincidence after all, but this was weird. I used to experience some paranormal things in the past, so I really think it means something.

Dammnnn this is so crazy

 

[unluckysadness]

Dammnnn this is so crazy

I've tried to upload the video clip from the specific sequence but the file is too large to share it here so I took pics from my screen. The episode is called "Terma" S04E09 if someone is interested.

 

[ctb_warrior]

I've tried to upload the video clip from the specific sequence but the file is too large to share it here so I took pics from my screen. The episode is called "Terma" S04E09 if someone is interested.

Thank you for sharing it dear

 

[korchoi]

It's a fateful encounter, just like something out of a movie! It feels so much like a romance film that I keep reading it over and over(I'm not gay, by the way)

 

[unluckysadness]

It's a fateful encounter, just like something out of a movie! It feels so much like a romance film that I keep reading it over and over(I'm not gay, by the way)

Yeah, and I've experienced weird things all my existence (even paranormal events...) I'm trying to write my story before I leave this world. I don't know if I'll have enough energy and time, but if I can, I'll share it here.

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I am flattered that you think 35 years or below is still a young adult.

 

[sifp]

Strange encounter…

But under 35? Really? That would probably be about 80-90% of members on this site…

Ya I'm borderline (37). I was briefly suicidal in my teens and early 20s but I'm glad I didn't ctb. Had some good years in my 20s and 30s. Now though at 37, I'm far worse than I've ever been, and there is a 50% chance I ctb at this age. Either way I'm gonna secure a method as an insurance policy.

 

[CTB Dream]

v amaze stry say ctb see ctb, this hnst talk no fake talk

 

[imissmycatsomuch]

I definitely think she was meant to cross paths with you and give you a safe space with her for that moment. She sounds so kind and honest. I'm glad you got a sign today and feel reassured in moving forward.

 

[EternalShore]

It's a really neat story that you were able to meet someone like that! :) I hope you can meet her again and become friends~ ^_^ sure, life still sucks, but having nice social relationships irl can make it a little less bad and lonely~ :)

 

[Captive_Mind515]

Ya I'm borderline (37). I was briefly suicidal in my teens and early 20s but I'm glad I didn't ctb. Had some good years in my 20s and 30s. Now though at 37, I'm far worse than I've ever been, and there is a 50% chance I ctb at this age. Either way I'm gonna secure a method as an insurance policy.

I wish I went in my 20's or maybe even in my teens when I first became suicidal. My point with that post is that everyone is different, everyone feels slightly different about these things. I don't think it's good to have rigid criteria like waiting until your 30's to decide, as it clearly will not be acceptable for many people.

 

[never mind me]

Interesting encounter. Although I have the feeling that when it comes to physical illness/disability people are more understanding that somebody considers suicide or euthanasia. But I think people can also suffer a lot from mental illness alone and suggesting to someone in their teens that they should wait till their late 30s till they commit suicide means a long time of suffering for some folks.

 

[PeaceSeeker83]

Ya I'm borderline (37). I was briefly suicidal in my teens and early 20s but I'm glad I didn't ctb. Had some good years in my 20s and 30s. Now though at 37, I'm far worse than I've ever been, and there is a 50% chance I ctb at this age. Either way I'm gonna secure a method as an insurance policy.

That's the main thing. To get in place (if possible) a somewhat peaceful method with a background of near certainty.

Interesting encounter. Although I have the feeling that when it comes to physical illness/disability people are more understanding that somebody considers suicide or euthanasia. But I think people can also suffer a lot from mental illness alone and suggesting to someone in their teens that they should wait till their late 30s till they commit suicide means a long time of suffering for some folks.

I think at adult age (20) people should be allowed to exit peacefully and the option should be there. It is a very long time from teens until late thirties. These are the young years where time can appear slower for many.

 

[sifp]

I wish I went in my 20's or maybe even in my teens when I first became suicidal. My point with that post is that everyone is different, everyone feels slightly different about these things. I don't think it's good to have rigid criteria like waiting until your 30's to decide, as it clearly will not be acceptable for many people.

I agree. I was just speaking for my personal situation. Fortunately for me I have one person in my life who is supportive with respect to suicide (my mother). I am going to set a timer for like a year and try really hard to get better and if it doesn't work suicide is on the table and she will help. My therapist green lit this plan even so I feel pretty lucky.

 

[GardenGirl089]

Crazy when i was 17 that was how i wanted to kill myself. Drive vehicle into a tree. That way i caused no one else harm but at a high enough speed would kill me. I do believe in signs and that seems like a sign for sure. And my two times being suicidal in my life have been over health issues and no one listening to figure out what was wrong. Back at 17 yrs old and again just this year at 39 yrs. old. Pain and bad health really make living feel like pure suffering.

 

[unluckysadness]

Crazy when i was 17 that was how i wanted to kill myself. Drive vehicle into a tree. That way i caused no one else harm but at a high enough speed would kill me. I do believe in signs and that seems like a sign for sure. And my two times being suicidal in my life have been over health issues and no one listening to figure out what was wrong. Back at 17 yrs old and again just this year at 39 yrs. old. Pain and bad health really make living feel like pure suffering.

I'm sorry for your suffering. Could you ask for euthanasia / assisted suicide ? You could be eligible if you have bad health and if you suffer since decades. If you need some information about VAD, you can DM me. I hope you'll find peace in this life or in afterlife

 

[GardenGirl089]

I'm sorry for your suffering. Could you ask for euthanasia / assisted suicide ? You could be eligible if you have bad health and if you suffer since decades. If you need some information about VAD, you can DM me. I hope you'll find peace in this life or in afterlife

Thanks. But no. I was good for all those years til this year. And they have finally found what is wrong with me. Just took so long to fight insurance and do what they wanted to cover the medicine. Its about a four month recovery from these infections. So probably going to feel like giving up many times during the next few months. The sad part is i have had quite an array of health issues and injuries that all this year made me realize is that im just living until the next time something comes up. I dont want to continue living and suffering this cycle and im only 39 so i have along time ahead of me esp for my health to fail me again and again or another injury.

 

[unluckysadness]

Thanks. But no. I was good for all those years til this year. And they have finally found what is wrong with me. Just took so long to fight insurance and do what they wanted to cover the medicine. Its about a four month recovery from these infections. So probably going to feel like giving up many times during the next few months. The sad part is i have had quite an array of health issues and injuries that all this year made me realize is that im just living until the next time something comes up. I dont want to continue living and suffering this cycle and im only 39 so i have along time ahead of me esp for my health to fail me again and again or another injury.

I can feel you because I'm disabled too, and I get a new disease each year. I'm 44 so I could continue this shit for 30 more years, but that's not acceptable. Fortunately, I'm officially eligible for VAD in Switzerland, but I'm not sure to do it. It was just important for me to know I have this possibility.

 

[Carrot]

I don't think she's here on SaSu so I can share it.

I just want to point out that I don't think it would be wrong to post thus even if she was here, which we don't know. She doesn't need to post in this specific thread and out herself.