Venting It's all the same, and I want and end

[Str57]

I have trusted 4 persons with my suicidal feelings when I felt horribly lost, and now, all of them, have turned their backs at me, and I don't blame them, I am just a failure of a human being, I have known that for years and yet I am still here.
I have tried once to CBT, and because I talked to my last confidant about what I was going to do, she made everyone aware of the situation and they stopped me, but now she is just, distant to me, and it is all my fault.
I should have never been born, I am just a disaster that is just trying to pretend everything is alright, when it's not.
Just someone, please give something to keep going, or give me light to do it, I just can't, I always come back to the same, and it's desesperating, I just need someone to believe in, and maybe CBT is my only solution, but even then I am just a coward, someone who doesn't deserve the smallest of sympathy.
Someone just end my suffering

 

[FuneralCry]

It must be dreadful and tiring being trapped in that situation, to me it's really understandable just wishing to escape from all the suffering. But anyway best wishes.

 

[CW36]

I have trusted 4 persons with my suicidal feelings when I felt horribly lost, and now, all of them, have turned their backs at me, and I don't blame them, I am just a failure of a human being, I have known that for years and yet I am still here.
I have tried once to CBT, and because I talked to my last confidant about what I was going to do, she made everyone aware of the situation and they stopped me, but now she is just, distant to me, and it is all my fault.
I should have never been born, I am just a disaster that is just trying to pretend everything is alright, when it's not.
Just someone, please give something to keep going, or give me light to do it, I just can't, I always come back to the same, and it's desesperating, I just need someone to believe in, and maybe CBT is my only solution, but even then I am just a coward, someone who doesn't deserve the smallest of sympathy.
Someone just end my suffering

People in general don't know how to handle the situation, so they often slip away.

Remember, CTB requires a cool head and a good deal of rational thought. You don't want to take that risk until you've done everything you can to improve your chances.