I

its.all.gone

at the end we sleep4ever
Nov 3, 2023
35
it's all gone from my life...

my energy to fight for a better and happier life is all gone
my optimism is all gone
my self respect is all gone
my hope is all gone

maybe jotting this to feel I really want to ctb or maybe I am just jotting this down to cry and hug together.

write your all gone in this thread. repeats are ok.
 
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WAITING TO DIE

WAITING TO DIE

TORMENTED
Sep 30, 2023
1,539
Same.
Everything is gone.
No fight left in me.
Don't want to get better.
Just waiting for the end.
 
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february in alaska

february in alaska

wandering aimlessly
Sep 13, 2023
465
A genuine belief that my life could get better. A friend group, a close friend, or any friend at all. A desire to be someone important, and then a desire to be someone at all. Some childlike naivete that I was somehow special or different or an exception. A passion to create things. Hope for the future. As pathetic as it sounds, happiness in general.

I think all of it's been buried already. Now it's just waiting for me to join it
 
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S

SVEN

Enlightened
Apr 3, 2023
1,780
I'm just weary.
 
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Glandular

Glandular

Student
Mar 23, 2023
128
My health is gone ...
 
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P

Praestat_Mori

Mori praestat, quam haec pati!
May 21, 2023
11,508
My energy is gone
My hope is gone
My quality of life is gone
My self-confidence is gone

I've given up mentally but life itself hasn't given up yet ....
 
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LonelyKitten

LonelyKitten

Seeking one final escape
Aug 13, 2023
284
I lost everything that kept me remotely sane
A safe refuge from childhood trauma
Human connection
Social inclusion
The right to work
The ability to get an education
A purpose, and ability to give back to others
My greatest dream of citizenship
Young, bouncy optimism
What's left of my youth

I want it all back... But that'll never happen.
At most, a fraction.
At the very least, if nothing else, death will be there to keep me safe.
 
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C

CPY

Student
Oct 30, 2023
130
It's more accurate to say some things never came into my life
The last straw is the loss of control of my own mind
 
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Ducksauce6

Ducksauce6

Member
Oct 17, 2023
37
My, friends

Are all gone

My boyfriend while here in the flesh...is gone we don't even lay together...once a month sex if that.

My will to live is gone
My teeth , are almost gone...fuck it they are gone
My grandparents are all gone ... From dementia and death.
My body is all gone... All used up... By drugs..
My soul is gone
My heart has been stoped on with golf shoes
My.pets are almost all gone... And when they finally go will definitely be what I need to ctb...



But my.happiness... music, friends, late night car rides with people who you thought cared about you....maybe just.smokimg a blunt.amd.goimg.to.twco bell...
Gone


My money....people used a young closeted gay me for every drop....was.raped.and.sued the hospital for 50,gs.... When all said and.done when I turned 18 I got 29 grand... And I frivolously wasted it on weed...and drugs ....and heroin.... Because I hated myself....treated EVERYONE to EVERYTHING....people walked all over.me.and.took every cent.... Got me.addicted to drugs.... Partied and ruined.my.forst.apartment... and then just left me there....no love was shown to me... And the few friemds.thst did stick around left when I came out gay.... It caused me to leave a boy I care about.... My entire life.could of ....and should have been different....and when I think about this reality.... It makes me so fucking angry I could eat my iron Right now!....... But you know what... Everything goes away.... can anyone help me..... I really don't want to CTB by firearm and am immune to narcotics.... Id have to knock off a.hospital or something crazy....


But anyway I'm sorry I totally turned this in to word salad but know this.


My soul , body and.spirit , are gone, drug addled and tired.... I have no one.but a pretend abusive.boyfriend ...and a few ferrets that make me kinda happy.,... But other than that..... It's all gone



My YOUTH .....is gone.... I've gotten to live.to about ,30 and the last 15 or so years have had good moments but sucked.but really it's just been this last decade.... I'm over.it....


This post made me weep
...
 
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I

its.all.gone

at the end we sleep4ever
Nov 3, 2023
35
My health is gone ...

health going south is very hard. my best wishes to you.
My, friends

Are all gone
.
.
.
This post made me weep
...

drugs can eat you alive. sad that life has brought you to this addiction. yeah that was the intent of my post. sometimes writing it down can make up weep and at least feel something. it is so hard for me to even cry anymore. even crying can mean I am still an animal and not a dead machine.
 
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