• UK users: Due to a formal investigation into this site by Ofcom under the UK Online Safety Act 2023, we strongly recommend using a trusted, no-logs VPN. This will help protect your privacy, bypass censorship, and maintain secure access to the site. Read the full VPN guide here.

  • Hey Guest,

    Today, OFCOM launched an official investigation into Sanctioned Suicide under the UK’s Online Safety Act. This has already made headlines across the UK.

    This is a clear and unprecedented overreach by a foreign regulator against a U.S.-based platform. We reject this interference and will be defending the site’s existence and mission.

    In addition to our public response, we are currently seeking legal representation to ensure the best possible defense in this matter. If you are a lawyer or know of one who may be able to assist, please contact us at [email protected].

    Read our statement here:

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC): 34HyDHTvEhXfPfb716EeEkEHXzqhwtow1L
    Ethereum (ETH): 0xd799aF8E2e5cEd14cdb344e6D6A9f18011B79BE9
    Monero (XMR): 49tuJbzxwVPUhhDjzz6H222Kh8baKe6rDEsXgE617DVSDD8UKNaXvKNU8dEVRTAFH9Av8gKkn4jDzVGF25snJgNfUfKKNC8
Un-

Un-

I'm a failure. An absolute waste. A LOSEr.
Apr 6, 2021
652
Stupid title. Lemme explain.

I don't want this to seem like it's disrespectful. @SpentStardust recently.. Attempted. I'm not sure if he succeeded, but he had a YouTube channel. Not a lot of people watched him, but he lived outside of this forum.

I talk to a few people here, and it's.. Crazy learning about their lives. I'm talking about people that were once millionaires, people that were part of activist groups, people that had success in some fashion - people with genuine lives. That lived. Not always good lives, but lives nonetheless.

I don't know why this is only dawning on me now. But it makes every goodbye post all the more.. flabbergast-ly. All we see is a profile picture, and a username. But the scope of it is that THAT is a human being. With a face. And a smile. And a neck and legs. And (hopefully) clothes. With a brain. A person with a life that at least matters to them.

Similar to the Sonder effect.

This sounds surprisingly pro-life. Take it how you want.

Edit: My point wasn't whether we have successful lives or not. The idea is that you're a human being. A fully-fledged one. I could've made that part clear. My bad.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Love
  • Aww..
Reactions: ▪︎⚠ KOHI ⚠▪︎, astromoon, Made4TV and 27 others
Girl-shaped Wound

Girl-shaped Wound

In love with a person that doesn't exist
Feb 19, 2022
148
ll we see is a profile picture, and a username. But the scope of it is that THAT is a human being. With a face. And a smile. And a neck and legs. And (hopefully) clothes. With a brain. A person with a life that at least matters to them.
That is exactly why I avoid reading/participating in goodbye threads. Too painful.
 
  • Like
  • Aww..
  • Love
Reactions: Professor K, Conker, crowbait and 16 others
ge0rge

ge0rge

the satanic mechanic
Jul 29, 2018
659
that is exactly why I feel the matter of suicide and death should be approached with a lot more respect and sensitivity than just reducing things to pro-life or pro-choice. it's a matter of profound solemnity, and a lot has to be contemplated and considered beforehand
 
  • Like
  • Love
  • Hugs
Reactions: stermc, Made4TV, Conker and 27 others
ever so lonely

ever so lonely

terry joseph williams
Apr 17, 2022
282
i dont mate, i merely exist not so much live, believe it or not, no family to speak of anymore, mine or the family that ever truly cared for me and made effort are (deceased) of those alive we are estranged, have been for years, the likelihood is we will never speak again, even no phone contact anymore, total cut off, been 10 years or more now, no friends, during covid they dried up, and i distanced myself, nobody who gives a fuck about me in irl terms, so i have embraced it bro, what else can ya do, the only things i have is my dog if you consider that a life lol, ss, and other online mediums such as reddit etc, my pooch he loves me for me and i loves him very much, he keeps me on my toes for sure, and his a ikkle adorable, i live for his sake for time being now, safe in the knowledge the suicide method is there should i need it, and can act upon it, my suicide method is of course nicely and safely tucked away, the only other thing i live for is my video games and that is literal it, it gets lonely, but dude honestly you get better at distracting yourself to get your mind off of it, i think it is easy to assume in this day and age that everybody around you is living it up, when what really is going on is there probably just as lost as you and i, and probably just as lonely, it is easy to get into that trap esp with social media, and people portraying there lives as they wish to be seen, as opposed to how they truly are, they say we are living in a loneliness epidemic, i can well believe it with how shitty people are today, why would anybody want to get involved anymore lol, but honest mate your probably no alone in your feels, and i would wager most of us arent really living, most dont appear to even enjoy it anymore either, when i observe others, just as miserable as we are, i have always spoken my mind and been hated for doing so, but you get past the stage of caring, people can take it however they like, it is good to be authentic today and speak your piece as you view it, i think as long as your doing what makes you happy, and aint harming anybody, then we just get through this thing named living in our own ways, there will always be somebody along to poo poo you tho, just how it is i guess, but who cares, seriously, also how would we define what constitutes as living anyways ?.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: astromoon, FindingPeace8, makethepainstop and 3 others
whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,913
I'm pretty sure there are plenty that don't have a life by the standards that you're proposing and that is what pushing them to consider self-deletion.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Hirokami, makethepainstop, katagiri83 and 7 others
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,336
Some people don't live, they endure an existence just waiting to die. Not everyone has a life. I've never lived at all personally, the reality is that I'm already dead but still trapped here in the prison that is existence. I also don't see life as having any value or mattering in any way. Life just exists as a consequence of evolution, life is just a temporary and meaningless experience that is destined to end and be forgotten about. This is simply inevitable for us all, eventually we won't even likely exist in the memories of the living.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: astromoon, makethepainstop, Per Ardua Ad Astra and 4 others
hopeless302

hopeless302

Student
Sep 11, 2022
123
Stupid title. Lemme explain.

I don't want this to seem like it's disrespectful. @SpentStardust recently.. Attempted. I'm not sure if he succeeded, but he had a YouTube channel. Not a lot of people watched him, but he lived outside of this forum.

I talk to a few people here, and it's.. Crazy learning about their lives. I'm talking about people that were once millionaires, people that were part of activist groups, people that had success in some fashion - people with genuine lives. That lived. Not always good lives, but lives nonetheless.

I don't know why this is only dawning on me now. But it makes every goodbye post all the more.. flabbergast-ly. All we see is a profile picture, and a username. But the scope of it is that THAT is a human being. With a face. And a smile. And a neck and legs. And (hopefully) clothes. With a brain. A person with a life that at least matters to them.

Similar to the Aonde

This sounds surprisingly pro-life. Take it how you want.
bold of you to assume that I have a life... 😅 But yeah... I know what you mean. It's something I think about often. That's why if you check my post history, I sound pro-life when I'm speaking directly with other users. That's because behind every usernames there's a person who is struggling and wants the suffering to end. A person who, for better or worse, existed... and perhaps mattered to someone, somewhere. There is serious gravity to that.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: astromoon, Conker, 710 and 8 others
Un-

Un-

I'm a failure. An absolute waste. A LOSEr.
Apr 6, 2021
652
I'm pretty sure there are plenty that don't have a life by the standards that you're proposing and that is what pushing them to consider self-deletion.
I could've made it clearer. That's my bad. My point is that you, @whatevs, you are a real human being. All I see is an anime wallpaper, but the reality is that you are a real person behind that.. Fuck.. I guess I sound silly..
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: ksp, katagiri83, bdtbath and 3 others
whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,913
I could've made it clearer. That's my bad. My point is that you, @whatevs, you are a real human being. All I see is an anime wallpaper, but the reality is that you are a real person behind that.. Fuck.. I guess I sound silly..
I was just feeling contrarian, I got what you meant. The forum is an interface that can make human tragedy look less urgent or tangible.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: not_actually_human, ksp, katagiri83 and 4 others
Cathy Ames

Cathy Ames

Cautionary Tale
Mar 11, 2022
2,109
I'm pretty sure there are plenty that don't have a life by the standards that you're proposing and that is what pushing them to consider self-deletion.
And some of the people he's talking about had their "lives" in the past and are now reduced to having something less.
 
  • Aww..
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: lachrymost, katagiri83, makethepainstop and 4 others
whatevs

whatevs

Mining for copium in the weirdest places.
Jan 15, 2022
2,913
  • Hugs
  • Aww..
Reactions: Per Ardua Ad Astra, Venus13, Un- and 1 other person
Girl-shaped Wound

Girl-shaped Wound

In love with a person that doesn't exist
Feb 19, 2022
148
  • Like
Reactions: makethepainstop, actual_fox, whatevs and 2 others
E

Eternal Oblivion

Student
Nov 23, 2021
195
That's why I think that's not being born is the greatest gift one can recieve... Not to exist, not to suffer.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: lachrymost, Forgotten, Sunset Limited and 4 others
👁

👁️👃👁️

Enlightened
Aug 14, 2022
1,292
I could've made it clearer. That's my bad. My point is that you, @whatevs, you are a real human being. All I see is an anime wallpaper, but the reality is that you are a real person behind that.. Fuck.. I guess I sound silly..
Nah. I understand what you're saying. That's why I go on facesofsuicide.com sometimes and look at the faces and wonder "What kind of person they were like. What did they like to do. What led them to this point. Etc"
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: makethepainstop, ksp, Girl-shaped Wound and 4 others
Un-

Un-

I'm a failure. An absolute waste. A LOSEr.
Apr 6, 2021
652
Nah. I understand what you're saying. That's why I go on facesofsuicide.com sometimes and look at the faces and wonder "What kind of person they were like. What did they like to do. What led them to this point. Etc"
Something you could do is match the faces there with the profiles of the people here.. You probably couldn't, obviously.. For example, you wouldn't recognise @FuneralCry if you saw her in real life. Most probably, she'd look normal to you. That's most of the people here.

They're bloody real. One moment they're here, another moment they aren't. It's easy to just think of it as another profile with its username struck out. But what if that profile had a face to it?
 
  • Like
Reactions: astromoon, ksp, Per Ardua Ad Astra and 1 other person
Domimi

Domimi

End of all hope
Apr 20, 2020
67
Yea, I get a spine chilling sensation when I think that everyone here at some time was a baby, a kid. Some had big dreams, others just wanted attentive parents and to be fed. No matter the motivation, everyone had the will to live and pursuit what they felt like was right. Then, came the brutality of this world and sweeped this will away without giving a single fuck lol and here we are
 
  • Like
  • Aww..
  • Hugs
Reactions: astromoon, Élégie, lachrymost and 12 others
Un-

Un-

I'm a failure. An absolute waste. A LOSEr.
Apr 6, 2021
652
Yea, I get a spine chilling sensation when I think that everyone here at some time was a baby, a kid. Some had big dreams, others just wanted attentive parents and to be fed. No matter the motivation, everyone had the will to live and pursuit what they felt like was right. Then, came the brutality of this world and sweeped this will away without giving a single fuck lol and here we are
"Spine-chilling" doesn't describe half of it, lad..
 
  • Aww..
Reactions: Domimi and Per Ardua Ad Astra
Per Ardua Ad Astra

Per Ardua Ad Astra

Malpractice: NeuroDystrophy-Paralysis-Meds-Injured
Sep 27, 2022
3,639
  • Aww..
Reactions: Un-
Domimi

Domimi

End of all hope
Apr 20, 2020
67
"Spine-chilling" doesn't describe half of it, lad..
In my case it kinda does. Over time, the exposition to the burden and tragedy of the world reduced greatly my ability to empathize and to feel things. I have to force myself to feel anything that isn't apathy or mania. Honestly I can't say if that is a advantage or not :/
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Élégie, lachrymost, Per Ardua Ad Astra and 1 other person
Un-

Un-

I'm a failure. An absolute waste. A LOSEr.
Apr 6, 2021
652
In my case it kinda does. Over time, the exposition to the burden and tragedy of the world reduced greatly my ability to empathize and to feel things. I have to force myself to feel anything that isn't apathy or mania. Honestly I can't say if that is a advantage or not :/
For me, it's been more of a curse than a blessing. A lot of people here know I'm fucked in the head about a lot of shit.. Stuff like killing things.. Had I have empathy, I think it'd be more human like.
 
  • Like
  • Aww..
Reactions: Per Ardua Ad Astra and Domimi
N

noname223

Archangel
Aug 18, 2020
6,038
Stupid title. Lemme explain.

I don't want this to seem like it's disrespectful. @SpentStardust recently.. Attempted. I'm not sure if he succeeded, but he had a YouTube channel. Not a lot of people watched him, but he lived outside of this forum.

I talk to a few people here, and it's.. Crazy learning about their lives. I'm talking about people that were once millionaires, people that were part of activist groups, people that had success in some fashion - people with genuine lives. That lived. Not always good lives, but lives nonetheless.

I don't know why this is only dawning on me now. But it makes every goodbye post all the more.. flabbergast-ly. All we see is a profile picture, and a username. But the scope of it is that THAT is a human being. With a face. And a smile. And a neck and legs. And (hopefully) clothes. With a brain. A person with a life that at least matters to them.

Similar to the Sonder effect.

This sounds surprisingly pro-life. Take it how you want.

Edit: My point wasn't whether we have successful lives or not. The idea is that you're a human being. A fully-fledged one. I could've made that part clear. My bad.
I also feel sad that many new members seemingly only come here to say goodbye. On the other hand I don't know enough about them to judge. Maybe they are suicidal since decades. or were passive lurkers for a long time.

Personally I recommend people my approach to suicide. Trying a lot of things in order to recover, heal or at least feel a little bit less horrible. I think one should be careful with such a decisive action. On the other hand I met a lot of people with a complete different approach to life/death, different philosophies, different lives and biographies. And I don't think I have the right to impose them my will. This does not feel right.

I try to show different perspectives on several issues. I want that people start to think. Though many of us probably feel like they are in a living hell. I don't know how it exactly feels to be in someone else's shoes. I try to be careful with making judgments on people I barely know.

I wish people here could find a way to live with their own issues. Find a way that makes their torment less meaningless. But many lives are very complex which makes it hard to find a solution. And I don't feel competent enough to coach people on a regular basis. My own life already overburdens me. I am sure whether I am competent for that. And this should not be my main role anyway. I have to deal with huge problems on my own.

I try to give recovery resources, write posts which might be comforting or relatable. Maybe sometimes distracting of the pain. But my own resources are very limited. Often people need specific help and I don't have the energy to invest my time in it. I don't want to annoy people with platitudes. I know how painful that can be.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: Hirokami, brokensea, ksp and 4 others
actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
Yea, I get a spine chilling sensation when I think that everyone here at some time was a baby, a kid. Some had big dreams, others just wanted attentive parents and to be fed. No matter the motivation, everyone had the will to live and pursuit what they felt like was right. Then, came the brutality of this world and sweeped this will away without giving a single fuck lol and here we are
That is true you are speaking right here.
In my case it kinda does. Over time, the exposition to the burden and tragedy of the world reduced greatly my ability to empathize and to feel things. I have to force myself to feel anything that isn't apathy or mania. Honestly I can't say if that is a advantage or not :/
It makes me feel like I am psychopath, but that might mean that end is near because I can no longer empathize with loss my family will experience, and I can no longer love them like I used to do.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Per Ardua Ad Astra and Domimi
Unlucked

Unlucked

Student
Jul 10, 2019
189
Stupid title. Lemme explain.

I don't want this to seem like it's disrespectful. @SpentStardust recently.. Attempted. I'm not sure if he succeeded, but he had a YouTube channel. Not a lot of people watched him, but he lived outside of this forum.

I talk to a few people here, and it's.. Crazy learning about their lives. I'm talking about people that were once millionaires, people that were part of activist groups, people that had success in some fashion - people with genuine lives. That lived. Not always good lives, but lives nonetheless.

I don't know why this is only dawning on me now. But it makes every goodbye post all the more.. flabbergast-ly. All we see is a profile picture, and a username. But the scope of it is that THAT is a human being. With a face. And a smile. And a neck and legs. And (hopefully) clothes. With a brain. A person with a life that at least matters to them.

Similar to the Sonder effect.

This sounds surprisingly pro-life. Take it how you want.

Edit: My point wasn't whether we have successful lives or not. The idea is that you're a human being. A fully-fledged one. I could've made that part clear. My bad.
Not everyone, I stopped leaving my house at 15, I'm 24 now. I've just been wasting away here.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Élégie, Un-, Per Ardua Ad Astra and 1 other person
S

SamTam33

Warlock
Oct 9, 2022
763
...Personally I recommend people my approach to suicide. Trying a lot of things in order to recover, heal or at least feel a little bit less horrible. I think one should be careful with such a decisive action
...I wish people here could find a way to live with their own issues. Find a way that makes their torment less meaningless. But many lives are very complex which makes it hard to find a solution...
We have to be logical (and humble) enough to admit that sometimes there is no solution.

We all either live with our issues or we don't.

But I couldn't imagine telling someone in an abusive marriage I wish they could find a way to live with it.

For some people, life is no less abusive and it's perfectly rational to want the abuse to stop.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: ksp and Per Ardua Ad Astra
O

outrider567

Visionary
Apr 5, 2022
2,851
  • Aww..
  • Like
Reactions: Élégie, Girl-shaped Wound, 𖣴 nadia 𖣴 and 3 others
Lonerzepam

Lonerzepam

O'lord! I Have My Doubts
Sep 2, 2022
619
bold of you to assume that I have a life... 😅 But yeah... I know what you mean. It's something I think about often. That's why if you check my post history, I sound pro-life when I'm speaking directly with other users. That's because behind every usernames there's a person who is struggling and wants the suffering to end. A person who, for better or worse, existed... and perhaps mattered to someone, somewhere. There is serious gravity to that.
True facts, thanks for saying kind words on my goodbye thread. This makes me reconsider my choice even more. Which is a pro and a con if you ask me. Nonetheless I'm thankfull and I appreciate the effort you're putting in eventually helping or even saving someone's life. ❤️
 
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: ksp and Per Ardua Ad Astra
Venus13

Venus13

Experienced
Oct 2, 2022
233
I've felt this as well. It really is quite intense. There's a lot of life, and a lot of anguish, behind the username we don't see.

I'm really sorry you're here but I appreciate your thoughts @Un- There's a thoughtfulness to this thread that's bittersweet.
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
  • Love
Reactions: Un-, ksp, katagiri83 and 1 other person
Un-

Un-

I'm a failure. An absolute waste. A LOSEr.
Apr 6, 2021
652
It seems that @SpentStardust had a successful attempt yesterday… it was really painful to see his friends desperately try to get in contact on his YouTube channel after he announced his intention. There was a community out there that really cared for him… definitely hurts.
It's times like these where I wish I could, somehow, show people this place. For understanding. Regardless of whether I could or not, his choices are not my story to tell.

It's painful watching the remainders suffer in confusion. But I don't blame @SpentStardust at all. Impossible to..
 
Last edited:
  • Hugs
Reactions: Cathy Ames
makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,029
Stupid title. Lemme explain.

I don't want this to seem like it's disrespectful. @SpentStardust recently.. Attempted. I'm not sure if he succeeded, but he had a YouTube channel. Not a lot of people watched him, but he lived outside of this forum.

I talk to a few people here, and it's.. Crazy learning about their lives. I'm talking about people that were once millionaires, people that were part of activist groups, people that had success in some fashion - people with genuine lives. That lived. Not always good lives, but lives nonetheless.

I don't know why this is only dawning on me now. But it makes every goodbye post all the more.. flabbergast-ly. All we see is a profile picture, and a username. But the scope of it is that THAT is a human being. With a face. And a smile. And a neck and legs. And (hopefully) clothes. With a brain. A person with a life that at least matters to them.

Similar to the Sonder effect.

This sounds surprisingly pro-life. Take it how you want.

Edit: My point wasn't whether we have successful lives or not. The idea is that you're a human being. A fully-fledged one. I could've made that part clear. My bad.
Oh, we all have lives on here, but wanting to live them is quite a different story.
 
  • Love
Reactions: emgrl
rejected

rejected

Being alive is ghetto
Oct 13, 2022
28
Nah. I understand what you're saying. That's why I go on facesofsuicide.com sometimes and look at the faces and wonder "What kind of person they were like. What did they like to do. What led them to this point. Etc"
Is that a website still up? I went to look for it in my browser and it said it can't be found.
 

Similar threads

Paizen
Replies
1
Views
316
Suicide Discussion
notreallybored
N
kitia973
Replies
1
Views
274
Suicide Discussion
sdnlidnc
S
leloyon
Replies
23
Views
692
Offtopic
leloyon
leloyon
sadworm
Replies
4
Views
483
Suicide Discussion
happysunnydayy
happysunnydayy