Venting it sucks not being the most important person in anyone's life.

[ihateittoo]

I hate that I'll never be anyone's top priority. All of my friends always have someone(typically a significant other) who naturally is the more important person in their life. This is not a post lamenting about the fact im single, because I think what I want more than anything is just a close connection with someone. I know that no matter what I am never first priority. It just makes me sad to think about. I don't think I will meet anyone at college, life just seems so bleak right now.

 

[ondeathwaitlist]

Yes I can relate to it so hard. I just saw this couple from my uni who has been together forever and all and theyre gonna get married like good for them. one of my friends cheated and still is gonna get married. like damn. no one to choose me i suppose. then again if someone did choose me would i even need to be on Sanctionedsuicide? Lmao nope. good for them but god it makes me jealous and highkey wanna CTB

 

[GodzillasBiggestFan]

i feel the same. i dont care if i never get a girlfriend, i just want to be loved closely in some way. i feel kind of forgotten by my friends right now, im sure they dont mean to do it. but anytime i text someone it takes a week to get an answer, everyone's busy they tell me but then they all are with each other.

 

[violetforever]

i try to pretend its better to have any spot in someones life even if its not the most important spot but i think thats just making me want to kill myself more

 

[Luchs]

I've been having a harder and harder time with justifying my continued existence. There's no one to live for, very likely never will be. Once my parents are gone I'm going to be totally alone. Even now I'm slowly drifting away from the shared human experience into total isolation.
Never went to college, but the one semester at uni I did went pretty well, socially at least. You'll meet loads of new people, there are bound to be some you jive with. Just don't be an idiot like me and shut down any attempts of people trying to reach out to you.

 

[lavenderlilylies]

It's a very hard pill for me to swallow. That no one has or will ever choose my company. All my relationships have been a mere proximity.
Sometimes I think that it's silly of me to feel this way. But I can't help it, connection is very important for survival. It hurts. A lot. To be undesired

 

[delinquentsandwich]

I've always dreamt of being someone's first choice- their first person to go to for anything
mutual love and respect

I've searched all my life with no luck
it has caused my soul to crumble over time

it's a high ask and unachieveable

 

[starboy2k]

I used to feel this way, but then I realized when you are a priority to someone you will have to live up to bullshit expectations imposed onto you.

After coming to that little revelation, I enjoyed not taking up space in someone else's useless life.

 

[Kokonoe]

i've never been anyone's first choice or a priority to anyone either. even the person who was the most important part of my life, i still wasn't enough to be their priority either, not even remotely.
i am just worthless and easily forgettable to everyone i know.
i saw someone say that it is better to at least be in someone's life than not, even if you're not a priority, and i think i want to agree with that. but that's a specific kind of pain, too. to be kept around but constantly reminded you aren't worth their time, to constantly hear about all the people they spend time with instead of you and all the things they do without you. it's painful.
being anyone's first choice or priority is completely unattainable to me and i've long since accepted that, and the isolation that comes with it.