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lnlybnny

Mage
Jan 25, 2024
545
is there anything you wish you would get to live for?

as much as life can be unbearable, there are some beautiful things.

are there any ''beautiful'' things that still keep your heart warm and nice through adversity and that makes you feel bad for giving it up?

for me it's my favorite artists, music, concerts, movies etc. i wish i could live just for these in this world but this isn't the reality, as life isn't what you want it to be. people say you can do or be anything that you want but that is untrue.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,707
No, only non-existence is beautiful to me, under no circumstances could I ever wish for something as evil as existence. I find it disgusting how humans continue to so harmfully impose existence onto others, more than anything I wish I never existed, procreation is a horrific tragedy to me. Existence is evil as it's the source of all suffering and I don't want to suffer in any way, just the fact that there is literally no limit as to how much agony one can feel as long as they exist is enough to make me always prefer to not exist, I despise existence, it causes nothing but harm.
 
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L

lnlybnny

Mage
Jan 25, 2024
545
No, only non-existence is beautiful to me, under no circumstances could I ever wish for something as evil as existence. I find it disgusting how humans continue to so harmfully impose existence onto others, more than anything I wish I never existed, procreation is a horrific tragedy to me. Existence is evil as it's the source of all suffering and I don't want to suffer in any way, just the fact that there is literally no limit as to how much agony one can feel as long as they exist is enough to make me always prefer to not exist, I despise existence, it causes nothing but harm.
i wish i was like you, that i didn't love anything, it would be in my case a lot easier to just ctb, but when i go my heart will be with the things i love. i don't feel anything for family and don't have friends though, i just like to live inside my own world in my head. not being fit into this world is one of the main reasons for me to ctb.
 
AbsurdAbyss

AbsurdAbyss

Lost, broken, empty, fragmented.
Mar 4, 2024
113
Everything I've ever missed out in life, if I could. Unfortunately that's impossible - so I make my peace with my only real certainty in life, my end.
 
L

lnlybnny

Mage
Jan 25, 2024
545
Everything I've ever missed out in life, if I could. Unfortunately that's impossible - so I make my peace with my only real certainty in life, my end.
i'm having kind of a hard time letting some things go but i need to prepare myself as i can't have the luxury of being here just for these things
 
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sserafim

sserafim

they say it's darkest of all before the dawn
Sep 13, 2023
9,012
I would like to go traveling and be there for my favorite artist's music, but apart from that, I don't really care.
 
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lnlybnny

Mage
Jan 25, 2024
545
I would like to go traveling and be there for my favorite artist's music, but apart from that, I don't really care.
Same! It's funny how we love them but don't feel anything for people around us right?
 
sserafim

sserafim

they say it's darkest of all before the dawn
Sep 13, 2023
9,012
Same! It's funny how we love them but don't feel anything for people around us right?
Yeah ikr, it's weird. I guess that's what a parasocial relationship does to you 🤣 I connect with my favorite artist on a soul level though. Their songs describe exactly how I'm feeling. One of them even has the exact same birthday as me
 
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LostInTheWoods

Student
Oct 28, 2023
111
Music and concerts are two of the thing that kept me alive for many years, or even just the thought of "i want to see that artist live", in the last few years I haven't gone to concerts because I'm to depressed, but yeah I was like super rich I would live just for traveling and concerts. Even if I don't know if solitudine would be bearable, even as a rich. If I hadn't wasted the opportunities I had, I would be one of those who claims that music saved his life, but I wasted all my chances and now there is nothing worth in this world for me
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,387
The only games I'm that interested in are Sonic x Shadow Generations and Pokémon Legends Z-A.
 
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L

lnlybnny

Mage
Jan 25, 2024
545
Yeah ikr, it's weird. I guess that's what a parasocial relationship does to you 🤣 I connect with my favorite artist on a soul level though. Their songs describe exactly how I'm feeling. One of them even has the exact same birthday as me
i'm just like this, they are literally my life lol. i went to their concert and met one of my favs 3 months ago and can't stop thinking about it 24/7. she touched my hand multiple times at the concert and afterwards even hugged and kissed me and i don't think i'll ever believe this... it's one of the main reasons why it's incredibly hard to leave
Music and concerts are two of the thing that kept me alive for many years, or even just the thought of "i want to see that artist live", in the last few years I haven't gone to concerts because I'm to depressed, but yeah I was like super rich I would live just for traveling and concerts. Even if I don't know if solitudine would be bearable, even as a rich. If I hadn't wasted the opportunities I had, I would be one of those who claims that music saved his life, but I wasted all my chances and now there is nothing worth in this world for me
throughout the years i can say i did the same. the ctb thoughts are always around my head but i'm always like ''i need to live because of them'' but one can't live inside these dreams of always wanting to see a favorite artist, the reality isn't wonderful like this :(
 
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theboy

theboy

Illuminated
Jul 15, 2022
3,257
my family prevents me from ctb and YES so I really see my life as a struggle. It's hard for me to see the positive and beautiful.
 

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