Discussion Is there anything that makes you happy?

[yoomi]

Besides dreaming about sweet relief of death, what's something that brings you joy?

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Good food still makes me happy and I like to enjoy it.

 

[crystalblade21]

not really, but more than happiness, I'm just looking for less suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

No. Happiness doesn't even exist to me, I could never see any benefit to existing, having the ability to exist is something completely undesirable, existing is so tiresome and futile, it just leads to suffering and in general existence repluses me because of all the harm it causes. Only death could bring me relief, all that appeals to me is the true peace of permanent sleep.

 

[HAL 9000]

Define happy? Most sensory pleasure end up losing their impact soon after consumption. The only five things that bring me joy on a semi consistent basis are:

Food
Psychedelics
Film
Stimulating and/or humorous conversations
Dreaming

 

[Borderline]

It makes me happy when I haven't eaten anything all day and the number on the scale keeps dropping. I'm anorexic.

 

[neonzebra]

If I manage to get a difficult task done the dopamine feels good.

 

[Leeroy14R]

It makes me happy when I haven't eaten anything all day and the number on the scale keeps dropping. I'm anorexic.

Well Anyway... Moving on.
I am always on the verge of suicide, sometimes rarely...rarely... rarely when I am distracted, but suicide always persists. Do some distraction count as happiness? I don't think being distracted is happiness... In life there are never any good distractions. Just one addiction to the next ; one prison to another.

 

[daydreamer52]

My cat

 

[Kera]

Still my daughter and my grandchildren ❤ although I can't show it anymore. We no longer have personal contact, only via Whatsapp status pictures. However, the pictures make me rather sad. But no more pictures would be really unbearable. I miss her so much!!! I could cry day and night Apart from that, I only enjoy Sudoku and this forum Before my shitty illness, I had a lot of hobbies that I find very difficult now

 

[outrider567]

No, nothing, not in the last 19 Months

 

[EndOfTheLine84]

Besides dreaming about sweet relief of death, what's something that brings you joy?

The idea that maybe I can invent a time machine to go and fix the ridiculous mess that is my past, oh and whilst I am there remember to slap myself in the face, or better yet, knock myself out more like it, and tell myself to wake up from the denial and stop being a Narsissitic prick as that is only hurting myself in the end, oh and tell myself that my mother didn't raise me, she only abused me btw, and that's why I ended up messed up, that my sister is also likely damaged as a result too, so cut mum out of your life, or better yet, just deliberately trigger her NPD rage weak points by taunting her with hatred towards her knowing how toxic she is, taunt her until she starts the guilt tripping of her chest hurts in pain, and then smile and tell her "good better hurry up and drop dead" to watch how she starts yelling again, then shout child abuser at her screaming in her face pushing all her buttons, taunt that cannabalistic bitch by deliberately making her NPD rage, and smile at her as you do it so you drive her to collapse sooner........ oh and put all your savings into Bitcoin back in 2010 around say, let's not get greedy here, say May or June 2010 when it was around 30c each (and remember to back it up lol).

Other than that maybe to be outside walking and world nuclear war begins and I just happen to be under the blast radius of the first nuclear strike, that would be epic, painless death if there ever was one.

(does this have to be realisitic things other than wishful thinking? lol)

 

[tora]

animals make me really happy! just being around them makes my suicidal thoughts go away for a while. I also love music. certain songs make me feel like maybe I should keep living just so I can keep listening to them. like Close to You by Dayglow, my favorite song of all time

 

[angel_cries]

Having sex. I'm hipersexual bcs of my BPD.
But I love to discover new things; new music that I like, new food, new places and sometimes new people. I noticed I get really happy when I'm doing good in a team based multiplayer video game.

 

[Minsu]

Playing video games, listening to Mamamoo and eating junk food

 

[Death is my goal]

nope

 

[jessisme]

Spending time with my mother, spending time
with my dog, watching something good on television, going for a walk in nature, eating a good meal.

 

[angel_cries]

Playing video games, listening to Mamamoo and eating junk food

Mamamoo is so good. They've released the MV for HIP on one of the best days of my life that I still remember cristal clear me checking out, and Egotistic is on my top 10 most listened on Spotify to this day.

 

[Suspect_Device]

Alcohol and music.

 

[wanttodie]

yes ending my life

 

[CentreMid]

Aside from suicide, soccer still brings me some glimmer of relief.

 

[yoomi]

No. Happiness doesn't even exist to me, I could never see any benefit to existing, having the ability to exist is something completely undesirable, existing is so tiresome and futile, it just leads to suffering and in general existence repluses me because of all the harm it causes. Only death could bring me relief, all that appeals to me is the true peace of permanent sleep.

If you don't mind me asking, how come you haven't CTB after so much suffering?

 

[Ambivalent1]

The idea of having sex again. I hope it's disappointing so I can ctb.

 

[Pipsqueak!]

Probably drawing digitally. Drawing is basically the only thing I can do correctly.

 

[CrazyDiamond04]

My kitty cat!

 

[FuneralCry]

If you don't mind me asking, how come you haven't CTB after so much suffering?

I made a thread that explains this as a lot of people ask this question (usually those who are new to this site) who seem completely unaware as to how difficult suicide is. Suicide just isn't as straightforward as choosing to be gone.

I cannot stand it when people say that suicide is easy

This is one of the ignorant things that irritates me about people, it’s annoying when even on here some people assume that suicide is easy for everyone and say things like “if you hate life so much then why are you still here”, “how could you not have ctb yet” and it genuinely confuses me why...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[yoomi]

I made a thread that explains this as a lot of people ask this question (usually those who are new to this site) who seem completely unaware as to how difficult suicide is. Suicide just isn't as straightforward as choosing to be gone.

I cannot stand it when people say that suicide is easy

This is one of the ignorant things that irritates me about people, it’s annoying when even on here some people assume that suicide is easy for everyone and say things like “if you hate life so much then why are you still here”, “how could you not have ctb yet” and it genuinely confuses me why...

sanctioned-suicide.net

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to be mean or assume things. I was just genuinely curious.

 

[CW36]

Yes, lots of things. CTB isn't always about seeing the world as one giant black cloud. Many, such as myself, see the beauty and positivity in the world. We just decide that we've had our fill of it and want to see what's next. And no one knows that answer for sure.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to be mean or assume things. I was just genuinely curious.

You don't have to apologise, I'm aware of the fact that some people don't know how difficult suicide really can be which is why I linked that thread.

 

[Unknown21]

It's not happiness, it's instant pleasure.