Is suicide usually viewed by others as a “fuck you” message?

[Kramer]

I hope when I do it that it's viewed that way.

 

[Rue89]

There's one person that I hope views it that way.

 

[Kramer]

There's one person that I hope views it that way.

No one's answering my question :(

 

[Moon Flower]

I've been close to three suicides and never really thought about them that way, although now that you mention it my dad did it to avoid legal trouble, so that's definitely a fuck you to somebody

 

[clownangel]

I don't think "usually" but maybe, sometimes depending on what someone's relationship to the decedent is. Like, if someone left a note that gave that impression it's a pretty big clue to read it as "fuck off" or a last act of aggression - but I feel like with how much people avoid even trying to understand suicides a lot get painted with the same "poor them" brush.

 

[Rue89]

I don't think most people see it as a "fuck you" necessarily, but as selfish, like the person who ctb'ed just didn't take into consideration how it would affect others.

 

[justanotherstar]

I agree with rue, I think it's more often than not seen as a selfish act, don't think people would necessarily see it as a fuck you unless they had left a note or expressed that prior to CTB

 

[Ghost2211]

It really depends on each person's personality, and I'm sure some people will take it that way, and make it about themselves. Likely the people that were insensitive and selfish toward us during our lives.

 

[FriendofDeath]

I definitely think it depends on the relationship or if a note is left. For many left behind, the "What if?" question is asked over and over again. A large number of family members seem to believe the person fought as hard as they could, and they were now at peace. People want an answer, and to understand.

I think the method could also make a statement, like a suicide bomber.

 

[Kramer]

I don't think "usually" but maybe, sometimes depending on what someone's relationship to the decedent is. Like, if someone left a note that gave that impression it's a pretty big clue to read it as "fuck off" or a last act of aggression - but I feel like with how much people avoid even trying to understand suicides a lot get painted with the same "poor them" brush.

Why don't people bother to understand?

I don't think most people see it as a "fuck you" necessarily, but as selfish, like the person who ctb'ed just didn't take into consideration how it would affect others.

Why don't the others think of the individual's suffering?

It really depends on each person's personality, and I'm sure some people will take it that way, and make it about themselves. Likely the people that were insensitive and selfish toward us during our lives.

So the assholes of our lives will interpret it as a "fuck you"? That's good

I definitely think it depends on the relationship or if a note is left. For many left behind, the "What if?" question is asked over and over again. A large number of family members seem to believe the person fought as hard as they could, and they were now at peace. People want an answer, and to understand.

I think the method could also make a statement, like a suicide bomber.

What does jumping off a bridge tell people? The "what if" is egoistic nonsense on their part.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I know it's not right, but it's part of my plan, to be perfectly honest. Once I decided to go (for my own reasons), I also decided to frame it as a message to the people who put me in this place. It's quite possible my death won't mean a thing to them, but honestly, I think it will.

 

[Kramer]

I know it's not right, but it's part of my plan, to be perfectly honest. Once I decided to go (for my own reasons), I also decided to frame it as a message to the people who put me in this place. It's quite possible my death won't mean a thing to them, but honestly, I think it will.

How do you plan on framing it as a message?

 

[fly away]

Whenever I've tried to have a discussion with anyone about CTB, all I hear is how selfish an act it is, you'll destroy your family, etc. etc. It's like their minds shut down when I try to describe the horror that so many people live with until finally, it's no longer possible.
At this point pretty much everyone in my family knows I'll die from this. I've had it almost my whole life.
I did almost CTB on my sister's birthday figuring it would be a gift that keeps on giving, but the timing didn't work out.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Whenever I've tried to have a discussion with anyone about CTB, all I hear is how selfish an act it is, you'll destroy your family, etc. etc. It's like their minds shut down when I try to describe the horror that so many people live with until finally, it's no longer possible.

They reveal their own selfishness, veiled as concern and compassion.

How do you plan on framing it as a message?

The day that I've picked is a day of significance to my oppressor and it will stay with him forever. My preferred venue is also a message, but that's up in the air at the moment. I also plan on sending messages and posting an open letter. I don't want to go without having my say.

 

[gtrfvr]

not that I've seen. most people wont talk about it. if they do it's a sad and awkward moment then the subject is quickly changed. it doesn't make the news any more unless it was a celebrity or otherwise a big deal.

 

[Nymph]

I think it's more viewed as selfish and a " I don't care about how you will feel after I die and I'll leave you alone" sort of thing. Even tho it's not always like that obviously

 

[Kramer]

not that I've seen. most people wont talk about it. if they do it's a sad and awkward moment then the subject is quickly changed. it doesn't make the news any more unless it was a celebrity or otherwise a big deal.

People have the weird notion that just because they don't talk about it means they don't think about it either. Oh it's definitely thought about for years. I can assure everyone of that.

I think it's more viewed as selfish and a " I don't care about how you will feel after I die and I'll leave you alone" sort of thing. Even tho it's not always like that obviously

Yeah. But I am selfish so I don't care. They could even engrave it on my tombstone lol

 

[Rue89]

Why don't the others think of the individual's suffering?

Because THEY are selfish.

 

[Symbiote]

My suicide would be a fuck you to evolution and organisms as a whole. Or if there's a higher power, a big fuck you to them for creating such a shitty species with so many traits and randomize them to make it all not work together as intended.

 

[clownangel]

Why don't people bother to understand?

1. They're not as empathetic as they think they are
2. It makes them uncomfortable (even more so than just death on its own)

 

[Kat!]

Can be. I hope mine is.
It really depends on how that person has been acting in the past weeks leading up to ctb.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

Motivations can be various and a combination, I think most who do it are because they find no more value in living in the world. There simply was nothing left to be gained. I think a smaller percent are those who do it to avoid legal/ Criminal/ financial troubles.

 

[JamieJambo]

I would consider killing yourself trying to say a fuck you as being a pretty harsh thing to do to someone

 

[JinnDX]

I hope it's not.

I feel like suffering is some sort of constant in our world. Erveryone encounters it. Joy is optional, suffering is not.
It is also impossible to wipe out. I suffer and thus want to ctb. If I ctb my relatives will suffer. So my suffering is transferred to them in some way.

I think this is also partly the reason, why suicide generally is not accepted in our society. Because all of us suffer. Everyone has encountered difficult and very difficult times. But still the suffering is not split evenly. Some get lucky, some can get very very very unlucky. There really is no rock bottom I think.

I don't really understand why I would care. But I hope my relatives will always remember the best sides of me. Not as a fuck off message. Not as a coward. Or whatever. I love them and hope to stay in their hearts. I will keep them in my heart when my time has come.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I don't think it is, personally. I've never gotten one form anyone. But, I wouldn't take it that way unless it was directed personally at me. Then I'd just feel sad, I think, that I could have caused someone so much harm that they needed take to their life. I think it's more a fuck-you to life.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

I'd like my suicide to be seen as a big "fuck you" to my biology and genetics.

 

[outrider567]

Not in my case--The few that will miss me will totally understand why I did it, because of a great loss and nothing else

 

[Superdeterminist]

I think sometimes it is, I'm not sure about usually. Often it's instead viewed as a fearful escape from torments. I do want mine to be viewed as a sort of F U against existence and the fate it has handed me, and handed others who got even worse hands than I did, even when they themselves would not say so.

 

[jackodonnell]

My therapist told me a story. There was a man who wanted to kill himself because his wife left him for another man. He told the therapist he was going to kill himself as an act of revenge. The therapist said that his ex-wife would go to his funeral with her new man and nothing would change. The therapist went to the funeral after the man killed himself and he saw his ex-wife there, holding hands with her new man. The lesson here is revenge isn't the best reason to CTB.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that most anti choicers probably view suicide as some sort of tragic act that could have been prevented, these types of people are often irrational and do not understand what the person went through as they are not suicidal themselves. Maybe if someone leaves a hateful note, it may be viewed as that though.