Discussion Is suicide quitting?

[savoytruffle]

I was in the middle of watching this show, ted lasso, which i was told was a feelgood wholesome show to get your mind off things and just relax and smile a bit. I was mildly surprised to see in said show a whole storyline about a character's dad ctb, which led to said character's views on winning and losing, because he feels that his dad 'quit' on him and his family.

is that a valid way of seeing things in your opinion? it really soured me to see that, i know that its a fictional show but the opinions it influences are not. focusing on the person affected by the suicide but never acknowledging why it happened in the first place. to me it will always be out of despair and your right to end that despair

 

[Lullaby]

It feels like there's always this mentality that no matter how bad off you are, you have to pick yourself up and keep going.

I had a conversation with a cousin two years ago and she was railing me about not doing anything with my life. I told her I was extremely depressed and suicidal, she responded "So? I was hospitalized once and went back to work a few days later." It's ridiculous.

I can't imagine the pain of losing someone, let alone to suicide, but some people don't want to keep on going. I don't really see it as quitting, but ending your book a little early. You don't feel like writing anymore chapters, and that's completely fine.

I think people who aren't depressed or suicidal are never going to see things this way, and I don't really expect them to. It's really difficult to convey the battle you go through everyday when you're struggling mentally. It's something you can't truly understand unless you've experienced it. I feel like I've I ever recover, I'd still very much be pro-choice when it comes to these things.

 

[Smart No More]

Sometimes quitting is a logical decision. Realistic and pragmatic in context to your situation. So I don't think the term quitting is really fairly descriptive. It's too negative a conotation in people's perception but strictly speaking it's grammatically correct. There are just more appropriate words for some people's choice in taking their leave from life as it is for them.

It's understandable that a child would feel that way about their parents choice but it doesn't make them right. It's too multifaceted but I think it's true in some cases and not in others. Some are more easily defeated than others. Not sure how you fairly differentiate between them in the name of justification.

 

[FuneralCry]

No, I do not believe so. We have no obligations to stay alive as we did not ask to exist. We all have the right to exit this world at a time of our own choosing. It is a personal decision when to leave. Why should someone be forced to suffer against their wishes until old age. We will all die eventually someday. I think the whole quitting thing is from the perspective of non suicidal people who do not really understand, and they live under this delusion that suicide could have always been prevented in every case.

 

[Eily]

I was in the middle of watching this show, ted lasso, which i was told was a feelgood wholesome show to get your mind off things and just relax and smile a bit. I was mildly surprised to see in said show a whole storyline about a character's dad ctb, which led to said character's views on winning and losing, because he feels that his dad 'quit' on him and his family.

is that a valid way of seeing things in your opinion? it really soured me to see that, i know that its a fictional show but the opinions it influences are not. focusing on the person affected by the suicide but never acknowledging why it happened in the first place. to me it will always be out of despair and your right to end that despair

In my opinion, I do not feel it is giving up. My issue with people feeling "angry" and "betrayed" by those who commit suicide is their lack of understanding. At the end of the day, these same people complain that you're stressing them out with your depression or erratic moods. Sometimes they are even the cause of your unhappiness or if they aren't, they do not help at all. Everyone swears up and down they would of been there for the person that's hurting but that's the thing. They weren't.

It's kind of like abortion tbh. Everyone wants the child to be born but they don't want to take care of it. So many children in foster care that suffer from mental illness and abuse of all forms. No one is running to save them or help them. Then you turn 18, and you really don't matter because now no one is legally obligated to be nice to you if that makes sense. They call you lazy and unbalanced. They are angry that their tax dollars are helping "unworthy" adults.

You die no matter what. To me, it doesn't matter if it's now or later. If you can't function in life then you cannot be the ideal spouse, child, coworker, and friend that they want you to be in the first place.

But yeah, lmao sorry I always blahblah too much but fuck what people think. You're not giving up, you are realizing your limits. That's completely natural.

 

[Al Cappella]

I think where that comes from is the idea that suicide is a choice, that a person chooses to leave family, etc. If you take the view that suicide is a product of illness/genetics, then it's not really a choice, any more than having cancer is a choice.

Oh, not talking about age-related suicide here, not sure how that works yet…

 

[WorthlessTrash]

It is quitting, but there is nothing wrong with that. It should be one's choice to "quit" a life they never consented to having.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

For me, personally, it is quitting. But I have a pattern of doing so. When confronted with overwhelming challenges, I am over come with anxiety and I tend to mentally fall apart.
Previously, I've always run away but managed to survive. To come up with a narrative rationalizing my retreat. But I've never experienced a collapse at this level. Previously I had always convinced myself I would live to fight another day. I can't imagine that happening now. I just want to sleep.

 

[GreenTree]

I don't think it's quitting. People who say that don't know the unbearable suffering we experience. That's bravery to ctb.

 

[Superdeterminist]

Quitting a terrible game, yes. A very fair and respectable move.

 

[M.i.245541]

I also see it as quitting. But sometimes you just can't play the game forever if you are in constant pain, you don't know the rules and each moment is suffering. I rather quit than spoil the game for my loved ones by constantly dragging them down

 

[membo]

Suicide is knowing when to quit a game that everybody eventually loses.

 

[TheBroken]

Agree with @tim30 and others. Everyone has all sorts of opinions about other peoples views, actions or inactions - there are as many opinions of each person as there are people in the world. The real question is what's right for you in all areas of life and death and what keeps you from making a stand in these areas regardless of what others think. Live, die, do whatever ..... its your life and your decisions. Does each decision affect the world and others ..... yes ..... and for me balancing and/or weighing an acceptable balance of actions and outcomes was the real lift in my decision, not the opinions or views of others, because that's a battle that can't be won or solved. It just can't .......

 

[sadshrike]

It's survival of the fittest in a f*ed up capitalist society. I don't think it's giving up at all. In fact, I've 'given up' more by staying alive for the past few years solely not to hurt the few left who love me. In doing so I become more and more dissociated. I've completely lost myself that I am unrecognizable to myself.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

It's definitely quitting. I think sometimes that quitting is necessary and even just and right.

 

[Smart No More]

Let's not forget that this particular act of quitting is one of, if not the hardest we will ever face. One that we, us here now have yet to actually manage. Some of us have even failed attempts already due to SI. It's not quite a rage quit or laziness driven, path of least resistance act. Although many of us wish it was as that would make it easier for us to end the suffering.

 

[Pluto]

It can be analogous to discarding a bad and abusive relationship. Everyone thinks that is OK, bar some religious nutters. The only difference is that with suicide, the bad relationship ended is the relationship with life itself.

 

[MicropBaldCurrycel]

as the saying goes, sometimes the only winning move is not to play.

 

[greyhound]

What if the game continues in your next life, so by commiting suicide you actually get to keep playing?

 

[Smart No More]

What if the game continues in your next life, so by commiting suicide you actually get to keep playing?

Tbh I think I'm okay with that. My need to ctb is based on health issues so were I to be without them I'd be happy. However it's probably a bit presumptuous of me to assume I'd be 'me' in the next part of the game so maybe I'd get dealt a worse hand. Who knows, eh!?

Either way, a reroll of the dice isn't such a bad thing for some of us. It could be a better result next time around.

It's funny, since getting in the state of health I am now I've rethought through some things. I had some pretty shit moments in childhood. I'm quite different to many if not all people I know and rarely fully find someone I can connect with entirely. I'm okay with that because it's all a side effect of how I was moulded by my chilshood and it made me the person I became. The person I became was someone I actually really liked being. Not everyone is lucky enough to feel that completeness. That contentment. So yeah, I guess that's why, for me, I'd quite like another go with my health back.

 

[MementoMori81]

I suppose one could view it as quitting. Although I've always felt quitting to be taking the easiest option, which I wouldn't consider rational suicide to be; purely down to the sheer will it takes to override billions of years of evolutionary survival instinct.
So, within that context, I wouldn't call it quitting - I'd rather look at it as taking the greatest leap one human can ever take.

 

[Idontmatter]

It's more like giving up on trying to find treatment that helps me with my depression. Nothing works

 

[greyhound]

Tbh I think I'm okay with that. My need to ctb is based on health issues so were I to be without them I'd be happy. However it's probably a bit presumptuous of me to assume I'd be 'me' in the next part of the game so maybe I'd get dealt a worse hand. Who knows, eh!?

Either way, a reroll of the dice isn't such a bad thing for some of us. It could be a better result next time around.

It's funny, since getting in the state of health I am now I've rethought through some things. I had some pretty shit moments in childhood. I'm quite different to many if not all people I know and rarely fully find someone I can connect with entirely. I'm okay with that because it's all a side effect of how I was moulded by my chilshood and it made me the person I became. The person I became was someone I actually really liked being. Not everyone is lucky enough to feel that completeness. That contentment. So yeah, I guess that's why, for me, I'd quite like another go with my health back.

Yeah same, my CTB is 100% health related. If I take some drugs that suppress my symptoms I have a few hrs of feeling normal. It is heavenly. If only I could feel like this all the time. I don't hate life at all, it is certainly hard and there are aspects that are hateable. I just have this unwinnable fight in this disease. I have already fought it for decades, can't imagine doing it for more So another role of the dice would be great. I'm sure I'll have challenges, but just different challenges would be ok i think Fighting these same health issues for another couple decades is going to drive me crazy.