Discussion Is optimism a choice?

[Forever Sleep]

Do you suppose some people are born with more optimistic genes than others? I believe this to some extent. Perhaps resilience would be a better way of looking at it.

I wonder how much of it is intrinsic, how much is learned behaviour and how much is choice. Some people never seem to let life's problems get them down. Others seem to make an effort to correct themselves to accentuate the positive when they feel themselves becoming negative.

Is it instinctive for some folk to be positive? I think our 'base lines' likely are all different to begin with- whether that be through nature or nurture. Still- on top if that- I think people do or don't make the effort to change their thinking to various degrees- or perhaps they just pretend to be positive when they don't feel it deep down. What do you think?

 

[lionetta12]

Do you suppose some people are born with more optimistic genes than others? I believe this to some extent. Perhaps resilience would be a better way of looking at it.

I wonder how much of it is intrinsic, how much is learned behaviour and how much is choice. Some people never seem to let life's problems get them down. Others seem to make an effort to correct themselves to accentuate the positive when they feel themselves becoming negative.

Is it instinctive for some folk to be positive? I think our 'base lines' likely are all different to begin with- whether that be through nature or nurture. Still- on top if that- I think people do or don't make the effort to change their thinking to various degrees- or perhaps they just pretend to be positive when they don't feel it deep down. What do you think?

I think so, I'm painfully optimistic and resilient and it hurts me in so many ways because I'm so hopeful in the most hopeless, abusive and unrealistic situations there is. For the sake of my health and well being, I wish it was easier for me to not be so patient and for me to just give up on people and situations that are bad for me a lot sooner than I do.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I think so, I'm painfully optimistic and resilient and it hurts me in so many ways because I'm so hopeful in the most hopeless, abusive and unrealistic situations there is. For the sake of my health and well being, I wish it was easier for me to not be so patient and for me to just give up on people and situations that are bad for me a lot sooner than I do.

You know- I never really considered that it could be a bad thing but I see what you mean. Hope can be a real bitch when people and situations keep slapping you back down again.

I suppose I have always seen my cynicism as more realistic. Plus- that always dreading the worst in every situation sometimes means I'm pleasantly surprised when it's not quite as dreadful as I feared!

 

[lionetta12]

You know- I never really considered that it could be a bad thing but I see what you mean. Hope can be a real bitch when people and situations keep slapping you back down again.

I suppose I have always seen my cynicism as more realistic. Plus- that always dreading the worst in every situation sometimes means I'm pleasantly surprised when it's not quite as dreadful as I feared!

I'm too optimistic in every situation and so I stay in situations and around people I really should leave and not be around and that combined with an insane amount of patience is lethal.

 

[Pluto]

I don't know if the mechanism behind optimism is known. In a series of experiments on learned helplessness, it was found that some dogs responded to an adverse situation by seeking a way out, while others descended into a state similar to human depression. At a practical level, the explanatory style of an individual - the story we tell in interpreting events - may determine whether we are prone to descending to defeatism in an otherwise workable situation.

On the other hand, optimism can be a very harmful trait. It can lead to excuse-making in abusive situations ("He will change"), or it can cause avoidance of self-improvement - for example, viewing conditions like obesity positively.

Presumably, there is some Middle Way between the pessimism that causes premature defeat and the optimism that denies the need for change.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

I think for genuine optimism, there needs to be cause. I don't think optimism is the results of genes, but rather cause to believe things will work out.

 

[manocsak]

I don't think it's a choice I've force myself time and time again, to be optimistic about stuff, insane effort for nothing. Doesn't matter how hard I push it's not in me my general approach to everything is to check the worst case scenario.

When it's working it's forced, and not sticking, and not feel right!