is it wrong morally to date as a suicidal person?

[rammi77]

I'm in your same situation. My partner knows what i'm going through and they still loving me and taking care of me. It feel like shit sometimes because i don't want to harm them but it's beautiful and relieve having someone as special as them because in my situation, makes me feel little less overwhelmed with life and keeps me going having them at my side, telling me everything is going to be fine.

It's so comforting to know someone else is in my situation too! Remember you're never alone, everybody deserves love. I'm always available for you if you want to chat with me, tomorrow will be a nice day

"is it wrong morally to date as a suicidal person?"

Just from personal experience... I don't think so, as long as you're not actively planning to go through with it. I've always had suicidal-negative tendencies from having a traumatic past, childhood. But, when I had met a partner that I felt loved me... I think it calmed down those kinds of thoughts, even if it'd still come up sometimes - because, I would never want go through with it, since I knew it'd be hurtful to my partner. So, it actually motivated or at least made me stay alive as long as I continued to be coupled with them... I'd keep trying at life, and seeing where it took me because I felt like I wasn't struggling alone at least (almost like they were my anchor). Plus, I cared about them, so I didn't want to hurt-traumatize them if I suddenly just died while we were together.

Now that I'm not really dating anyone seriously, I no longer have a reason to stop myself. Having plans to CBT, actually makes me hesitant to get involved with anyone now, because it could stall or stop me from going through with it... and I'm kinda just tired of living.

I think being truly loved can be healing.... but, you would need to be open to that kind of change in the first place. I think when someone has become totally set on CBTing no matter what though, they've already closed themselves off from others, and from recovering.

I agree with your sentiment completely, thanks for the input!!! Also cool nazrin pfp!!

 

[lebrodude]

Even if I wanted to date right now, I'm not in the proper frame of mind at all to even be attractive to anyone.

No one wants to date someone who is very depressed.

 

[dyingslowly]

I posted that my boyfriend found out I use this site, didn't really mention I was suicidal or anything just generally was talking about it. i wouldn't class myself as suicidal but a commenter said I should show some empathy and just break up with him already. I'm curious about that, are suicidal people unable to date? Are they unlovable? I never thought that before but it did make me flustered so I'd like other opinions

Because it is asking a person to give you all of their live savings most prized assets and then all of a sudden you run away, I am never going to date (neither I am getting any dates since I am too ugly for that) for sure since I don't know when I will shoot my brains out in an impulse but never want anybody who loves me (if and only if to find me in that position.

 

[WonderingSoul]

I think it's fine to imo

 

[Wehmut]

I think suicidal people are definitely loveable. I think everyone should have a right to ctb. Its your choice at the end of the day. Leaving this world is not a crime and like others already said you shouldn't isolate yourself because you're suicidal. You can still do the things you want to do. If I would have a partner at the moment I would break up with them first and wait until there over with me and then ctb. To make sure they don't miss me that much. Definitely would have to find a good legit reason to break up so the breakup itself doesnt hurt that much. Maybe you could also tell them that you want to ctb and then they would break up with you themselves

 

[SexyIncél]

A nice suicidal person is better than an abusive jerk. And we've all met abusive jerks who somehow get into relationships!

• suicidal person: I'm gonna die in 14 months, just fyi
• partner: Hey wait!
• suicidal person: But you'll get my savings & shit. And we can do depraved things, that few ever experience, because, y'know... YOLO
• partner:

 

[lopsidedcrawdad1]

For me yes it's not good.

Once someone is suicidal, no matter how 'well' they get or if they recover, it's highly likely they will still die by suicide at some point when they inevitably relapse.

It just plays with other people's emotions. I wouldn't want someone suicidal in my life, we are a burden. Same as someone shouldn't have me in theirs.

This actually isnt true at all. MOST people who are suicidal recover and dont end up killing themselves. Its a bit different if youve been suicidal for a long time though.

 

[Zaphkiel]

Well it's case to case. But in general, i'd say it is, it can be a great mean of recovery. And if it doesnt work, it doesn't, period.

 

[BackpackBones]

I know this post is old but I feel like it's kind of relevant to me too.

Let me just come out and say that morally, it's probably not wrong to date while suicidal -as not all suicidal people are planning on going through with it. Some are just deeply depressed and only contemplating committing the act. From my experience there's different 'levels' before you finally go through with it; so there's always a possibility your dating life wouldn't really be affected.
In saying all of this, I would still like to encourage you to focus on your "intent" while dating. What're you looking to get out of being with this person? Is being with this person the last thing you wanna do before taking your own life? Are you okay with being selfish? Would your partner be okay with this too?

If you genuinely care about this person and you like the time you spend, then try your absolute hardest to ride it out. Put your feelings first sure, but put them before your actions. I've heard so many "perfect" relationships where one person just selfishly ctbs without even giving their partner a chance or giving their partner any kind of reason. Value what you have before you go. If you truely want to ctb then do the right thing and cut things off.

 

[piddincir]

my wife was a suicidal person, I knew when I met her, I gave her the best 10 years of her life, losing her has broken me but I understand it feels now and would not trade an ounce of my pain for those 10 years