Is it too selfish of me to ctb knowing my s/o will probably follow me?

[Smelly_ballz]

They have told me multiple times that if i ctb they will too. I believe them. I feel even worse as it is almost xmas and they have bought a couple gifts already but I really can't bare this pain. I need an outside perspective (ik i have to make the decision. I just need advice). I am their favorite person.

 

[cursedcure]

your choice. my bf killed himself and i'm going to follow him. i know it's not what he wanted but it is what i want. selfish? i resent him for the pain he left me but i understand him-the pain is too much, nothing not even love can make life worth living

 

[Brown-Jacket Revy]

Sounds like a really tough situation.

Personally, I hate when people use ultimatums.

Whether it's intended to be a genuine sentiment of love ("I love so much, I can't live without you") or a threat to deter your action ("If you go, I'll go, and that will make you feel guilty enough to stick around on my behalf"), it just reads as manipulation.

If your S/O chooses to follow you out, that's on them, not you.

Your choice to leave this world should be yours, and yours alone, and not conditional upon someone else's feelings or demands.

 

[penguinl0v3s]

Is this supposed to be romantic or threatening? I don't know if this is appropriate to say, but it would be a dream for me to ctb with my lover. Ultimately, your significant other has free will and it's his choice. Someone that will ctb because of their partner's death is probably already not doing the best, and there are many factors that aren't your fault that would have enabled his actions, if he does ctb. If you are worried, you could try to prevent his suicide by alerting authorities of his intentions in a scheduled send message.

 

[Smelly_ballz]

Is this supposed to be romantic or threatening? I don't know if this is appropriate to say, but it would be a dream for me to ctb with my lover. Ultimately, your significant other has free will and it's his choice. Someone that will ctb because of their partner's death is probably already not doing the best, and there are many factors that aren't your fault that would have enabled his actions, if he does ctb. If you are worried, you could try to prevent his suicide by alerting authorities of his intentions in a scheduled send message.

I think it is just the truth. I dont think it is meant to be threatening or anything. I will respect their decision to die if they chose to follow me bc I don't want to make them think they have to stay and suffer because of me.

 

[FuneralCry]

If other people decide to ctb then that's their personal decision. We all have our right to die and are destined for nothing but to cease existing anyway. To me the selfish thing would be expecting people to continue delaying the inevitable when they wish to be gone.

 

[pitchodile]

If they are "threatening suicide" when you suggest it then it probaly means they're struggling with some sort of mental health problems.
You gotta decide if you want to live and endure whatever causing you to feel this way or ctb and know there's a chance he may follow.
Realistically once your gone it won't matter as you will feel nothing anymore ( at least not in this universe if you belive in something after)

 

[Abyssal]

I'm in a similar situation with my parent. There's a very real chance my father will follow me, but he has my brother to care for and he would have to care for my cats because my brothers autism manifests in a way where I don't trust him to keep them alive. I plan to move out and distance myself, hence why my date is half a year away. Maybe that'll prepare him live without me.

You could dump your s/o and be there for them in the falling out. Ease them into living without you, and then ctb. Not a pleasant solution, I know, but I think it's your best option.

 

[hellispink]

Make sure to let them know how much you love them. Its their decision. They own their lives just like you own yours. They have decisions to make and you have yours. If they insisted and it was me i would suggest doing it together and that way it would be easier.