Is it right or wrong to inform your partner?

[Foresight]

Isn't the best thing to do is to tell them? If that option is available without worrying about getting involuntarily committed. I feel I wouldn't want to be caught off guard.

I feel bad after telling my husband again but I'm trying to do the right thing. I'm trying to get life insurance today. Even that feels shitty because I feel like a scammer but this world is dog eat dog and I want to give my husband something. That's another story though. This process is messy.

What's your opinion on telling your partner? Is it better left unsaid? I'm not sure anymore. I know I would rather be told and prepare.

 

[Hirokami]

For me, I would want to know if my partner plans to ctb. That way, I wouldn't be caught off guard; that would sting a lot more than me having the time to mentally prepare. Granted, they don't have to tell me, but it would still be nice if they did. And while I would like to spend the last moments with my them, I know I risk getting into legal trouble if I don't try to stop them ... Even though I never encouraged them to do the act in the first place.

And honestly, I would be happy to return the same gratitude. However, most partners wouldn't be too keen on their S/O taking their own life. And I know for a fact that telling my S/O would go terribly. There would be guilt-tripping and tons of (likely unintentional) emotional manipulation. Even if I don't get admitted, there would still be police officers/crisis units on their way to stop me; they wouldn't leave me be until I am no longer "at risk". Unfortunately, because of that, I would be forced to tell my S/O about my plans via text at an unknown location. Every relationship is different, of course. Though, one would be hard-pressed to find a partner that would be understanding.

 

[GentleJerk]

Isn't the best thing to do is to tell them? If that option is available without worrying about getting involuntarily committed. I feel I wouldn't want to be caught off guard.

I feel bad after telling my husband again but I'm trying to do the right thing. I'm trying to get life insurance today. Even that feels shitty because I feel like a scammer but this world is dog eat dog and I want to give my husband something. That's another story though. This process is messy.

What's your opinion on telling your partner? Is it better left unsaid? I'm not sure anymore. I know I would rather be told and prepare.

It's my opinion too that it's ideal, but it all depends on the circumstances. We probably don't know enough about you, him and the circumstances to say for sure.

There's a booklet about euthanasia that suggests bringing it up and discussing it with family often, whenever amicable to do so, that way when the time comes, they are able to accept it more easily, and won't be as shocked and unprepared. Of course it depends on the individuals and the situation.

*edit* In saying that, it hasn't exactly gone well for me after telling certain people, so just think it through and use your intuition.

 

[Idontmatter]

This is my current problem. Right now I'm not telling him so he won't try and stop me. I'll have a good by note for him and he will get life insurance money.

 

[Foresight]

This is my current problem. Right now I'm not telling him so he won't try and stop me. I'll have a good by note for him and he will get life insurance money.

I regret telling him. He never takes it well. I understand his grief but I wasn't trying to cause harm. I guess all we can do is detailed notes and life insurance.

 

[RagingCat]

I personally would prefer to know if my partner decided to ctb to make sure I do everything in my power to make their last days as peaceful as possible.
I have told my partnet about my plans and although he was not happy, he was supportive. I am still not planning to tell them the exact date so they don't try to stop me, can't be too careful with it.

 

[Idontmatter]

I regret telling him. He never takes it well. I understand his grief but I wasn't trying to cause harm. I guess all we can do is detailed notes and life insurance.

Yeah, I'm working on setting him up to be able to pay bills and everything after I'm gone in July

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Depends. I wouldn't want them to stop me. Then again, if i had a "partner", it would be even more hard to CTB morally.

Probably the only benefit to me being single xD

 

[Al Cappella]

No, because it's just an unnecessary burden for them to carry around, feeling they have to do something about it.

 

[Foresight]

No, because it's just an unnecessary burden for them to carry around, feeling they have to do something about it.

That's a good argument on the otherside. I guess I was projecting my wishes because I would rather know.

 

[wellherewego]

Most won't appreciate it

 

[NobodyKnowsMe]

My husband truly believes that anyone that commits suicide is a coward and taking the easy way out (easy, hell, he obviously knows nothing of SI). He constantly condems the few people that he knew that did take their own life. He is sure that we can just "pull up our boot straps and get on with life" or go talk to someone, if we think that might help.

So.... no way in hell would I ever tell him.

 

[Foresight]

My husband truly believes that anyone that commits suicide is a coward and taking the easy way out (easy, hell, he obviously knows nothing of SI). He constantly condems the few people that he knew that did take their own life. He is sure that we can just "pull up our boot straps and get on with life" or go talk to someone, if we think that might help.

So.... no way in hell would I ever tell him.

Wow. I'm sorry to hear that. It's not a good feeling to be misunderstood by your spouse.

Well my husband just left me so that answers my question. I probably will get denied on that life insurance anyway. I can't blame him.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Wow. I'm sorry to hear that. It's not a good feeling to be misunderstood by your spouse.

Well my husband just left me so that answers my question. I probably will get denied on that life insurance anyway. I can't blame him.

He walked out in your time of need?

 

[Foresight]

He walked out in your time of need?

What can a person do? I feel toxic and I'm glad he's getting out.

I think it's fine. I hope he feels better and moves forward. That's all you can hope for. I'm obviously gutted over it but this situation is coming to a close.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

What can a person do? I feel toxic and I'm glad he's getting out.

I think it's fine. I hope he feels better and moves forward. That's all you can hope for. I'm obviously gutted over it but this situation is coming to a close.

Maybe I'm naive, but don't marriage vows require a commitment be kept in times of "better AND worse"?