I tend to think- for the person leaving others, there probably is reason enough to go no contact. I imagine they will also be making effort to move on in life and start afresh. For the person left behind though, I imagine it can be more painful/ detrimental.
Do you think people go too quickly 'no contact' now though? Do you think it can be detrimental to them?
I watch the channel: 'Live Abuse Free' on YouTube periodically. They were one of the first channels I began to take comfort from when I began wondering whether a family bully may be a narcissist.
Anyhow, she has made a series of videos about a mother making public appeals/ complaints that her daughter has gone no contact:
As a lot of things on the web, many people are keen to play judge and jury. I suppose I also joined them in thinking she probably did have cause enough to want a fresh start.
Personally speaking- I'm no contact with certain people in my family but, they aren't blood relations. Asides from it making it easier for my parents, I feel there would be no benefit at all- only harm if I were to see them again.
When it comes to blood relations though- what are your perspectives? Should we stay with family- even when there are toxic elements there or- is it better to make a clean break- if we can? Do we owe them loyalty for some of the things they did do for us or, is the feeling they caused even some harm justification to cut them loose?
I'm not sure if it's in this video but, the mother here criticizes our whole modern culture as one that throws away family and stamps upon traditional values and obligations. Is that necessarily bad do you think?
I suppose it depends on who are involved and what damage was done or is likely to continue to be done. It's complicated though- when our needs can be at odds with one another. If the older parents or care givers still need and want that connection and family identity but maybe the children felt harmed by them and want out.
Of course, we can go no contact with partners and friends too. I only focussed on family because I have personal experience.
I'm in the weird position where- in my head, I've somewhat rejected my family and ideas of family- because it did me so much harm. Plus- it was false anyway. When my Dad remarried, it was the pretence of being a family when it was obvious some of us were mortal enemies! Because I do genuinely love my Dad though, I still play along to an extent. It's more like an uneasy truce between those of us still in contact. I don't think we trust or truly love one another though.
For those who have split from their families or other relationships/ friendships- do you ever regret the decision? Do you feel as if you missed out because of it or, was it a lucky/ happy escape? For those wanting to part ways, do you also worry that it might not be the best decision? I imagine it must be complicated when the situation isn't all bad.
Do you think people go too quickly 'no contact' now though? Do you think it can be detrimental to them?
I watch the channel: 'Live Abuse Free' on YouTube periodically. They were one of the first channels I began to take comfort from when I began wondering whether a family bully may be a narcissist.
Anyhow, she has made a series of videos about a mother making public appeals/ complaints that her daughter has gone no contact:
As a lot of things on the web, many people are keen to play judge and jury. I suppose I also joined them in thinking she probably did have cause enough to want a fresh start.
Personally speaking- I'm no contact with certain people in my family but, they aren't blood relations. Asides from it making it easier for my parents, I feel there would be no benefit at all- only harm if I were to see them again.
When it comes to blood relations though- what are your perspectives? Should we stay with family- even when there are toxic elements there or- is it better to make a clean break- if we can? Do we owe them loyalty for some of the things they did do for us or, is the feeling they caused even some harm justification to cut them loose?
I'm not sure if it's in this video but, the mother here criticizes our whole modern culture as one that throws away family and stamps upon traditional values and obligations. Is that necessarily bad do you think?
I suppose it depends on who are involved and what damage was done or is likely to continue to be done. It's complicated though- when our needs can be at odds with one another. If the older parents or care givers still need and want that connection and family identity but maybe the children felt harmed by them and want out.
Of course, we can go no contact with partners and friends too. I only focussed on family because I have personal experience.
I'm in the weird position where- in my head, I've somewhat rejected my family and ideas of family- because it did me so much harm. Plus- it was false anyway. When my Dad remarried, it was the pretence of being a family when it was obvious some of us were mortal enemies! Because I do genuinely love my Dad though, I still play along to an extent. It's more like an uneasy truce between those of us still in contact. I don't think we trust or truly love one another though.
For those who have split from their families or other relationships/ friendships- do you ever regret the decision? Do you feel as if you missed out because of it or, was it a lucky/ happy escape? For those wanting to part ways, do you also worry that it might not be the best decision? I imagine it must be complicated when the situation isn't all bad.
