Venting Is anyone else just completely over life?

[whycantyouloveme]

Hi, I'm entirely new to this platform so I have zero idea if I'm doing this right. But, is anyone just genuinely over life? I honestly don't even wanna CTB because I'm so scared that there's gonna be more life after death. I don't know why I feel this way if I'm honest. My life is okay now, but i have a lot of childhood trauma, mental issues, and more trauma from several abusive relationships. I don't wanna live, but I sure as hell don't wanna die. I'm scared both outcomes are just lose, lose situations. Someone told me that nothing could happen after death, that nothing should happen because when we really think about it, we cant remember what happened to us prior to being born.
Now, I guess that makes sense, but part of me cannot help but feel like there's more too it and that's what scares me. I'm very much so lost and don't know what to do with myself. I know I'm not alone on this, but I still can't help but feel like I am. Does anyone get what I mean? or at least what I'm trying to say?

 

[zdeweilx]

Yeah everything is just so meaningless and hopeless. If only my parents had used a condom on that cold rainy night in November 1999.

 

[Kanau_Nano]

I'm really scared that after death is a much worse experience than this. Most likely absolutely nothing, but even that scares me a bit. I get what you mean

Everything is so exhausting

 

[SurrealCereal]

I am suicidal not out of the inability to see a happy future. I am suicidal because I see the insane overhelming amout of work needing to be done to get there. It terrifies me and the longer I stay in this game the more work seems to pile up. I am suicidal out of fear what the alternative to death might be like.

 

[PanaxMan]

Hi, I'm entirely new to this platform so I have zero idea if I'm doing this right. But, is anyone just genuinely over life? I honestly don't even wanna CTB because I'm so scared that there's gonna be more life after death. I don't know why I feel this way if I'm honest. My life is okay now, but i have a lot of childhood trauma, mental issues, and more trauma from several abusive relationships. I don't wanna live, but I sure as hell don't wanna die. I'm scared both outcomes are just lose, lose situations. Someone told me that nothing could happen after death, that nothing should happen because when we really think about it, we cant remember what happened to us prior to being born.
Now, I guess that makes sense, but part of me cannot help but feel like there's more too it and that's what scares me. I'm very much so lost and don't know what to do with myself. I know I'm not alone on this, but I still can't help but feel like I am. Does anyone get what I mean? or at least what I'm trying to say?

Well it's irrelevant since you are gonna die anyway. No matter what.

 

[Wojaczek]

it's very exhausting to be alive

 

[Rhizomorph1]

Yeah everything is just so meaningless and hopeless. If only my parents had used a condom on that cold rainy night in November 1999.

Yeah seriously. If only our culture was psychologically literate too.

I'm aware I'm riddled with illness both physical and psychological. And I exercise great caution in only mentoring kids within my capacity. I'd never pass on these genes or perpetuate the cycle of trauma by having kids. I know good parents. I don't have that capacity. that's what makes me equivalent in moral standing: my choice to recognize that.

So many people having kids with 0 foresight or emotional + caregiving literacy.

We need a system that enforces it. I really would not be opposed to mandatory vasectomies and parenting licenses. With the right cultural framework to protect cross cultural and racial concerns of course.

 

[Hollowman]

Yep, have been for years.

 

[mikidagreen]

theres genuinely no point to life, not even the most serotonin inducing things in life will overtake how fucking sorrowful being alive is. the only actual solution is suicide.