Introduce yourself

[Swisher]

Hello everybody.

I'm a 30 year old male from Australia. I'm a unemployed scientist who has been struggling with bipolar for at least ten years, maybe more. I attempted suicide during a manic episode 11 years ago but it was totally unplanned and failed.

I have been trying to find medication that will alleviate the suffering I have been feeling for my whole adult life, but I am running out of options. There will always be one option left though...

Not planning on a date, but preparing all the equipment I need so that when the time comes I am ready.

Here to talk to like-minded people and to make sure my method is assured to work.

Hello...& Sounds like I could use expertise! I want to know all about it...or anything..., if you want to share

 

[Throwaway563078]

Hello, female in my early twenties. I thought it'd get better but it never does. I have a bunch of mental issues including anxiety depression and bpd. I'm also a closeted atheist in the middle east. That's just the cherry on top. I'm tired of being tired, I'm tired of dealing with myself and life. I never fit in or felt like I belonged. Things will only get worse now and I hope to "go home" soon.

 

[onewayroad]

I don't suffer from anxiety but I have crippling depression and bpd. I know how hard it can be to do the most mundane things like shower and get dressed. I am 30 now and have been suffering since I was a teenager. ~15 years. This advice might not apply to you but one thing that has kept me going was the promise that I didn't have to live for another few decades like this, that I have a way out. Personally I want to try every treatment available to me first so that I know I had no chance of a normal life. If I could take a pill that made me feel like a normal human being I would not want to ctb. But, I haven't found that yet. And I'm running low on treatments to try, so I might end up going sooner than I thought. Anyway, that's me. I think we're in similar positions. Except your location makes your life even harder than mine.

 

[Swisher]

Hello, female in my early twenties. I thought it'd get better but it never does. I have a bunch of mental issues including anxiety depression and bpd. I'm also a closeted atheist in the middle east. That's just the cherry on top. I'm tired of being tired, I'm tired of dealing with myself and life. I never fit in or felt like I belonged. Things will only get worse now and I hope to "go home" soon.

Hello. You always fit in here.

 

[Mori]

Hi there.

I love every waking moment on this earth and have never been happier to be alive! ...(jk)

Just found this place yesterday and wanted to say hi. I've been dancing around suicide for about a year now with increasing levels of commitment.

Talking to like-minded people sounds really nice.

 

[Throwaway563078]

Hello. You always fit in here.

Hey, thanks

 

[Swisher]

Hi there.

I love every waking moment on this earth and have never been happier to be alive! ...(jk)

Just found this place yesterday and wanted to say hi. I've been dancing around suicide for about a year now with increasing levels of commitment.

Talking to like-minded people sounds really nice.

Hi. Liked that first comment!

 

[Anyara]

Hello all,

I see I forgot to introduce myself as well here..
My name is Nathalie and I am from The The Netherlands. I am 28 ( 29 at the end of the month ) and have a love for women and cats..
I think the pussy is the common ground here.
Also play a lot of videogames to pass the time till I finally get a job or ctb
Offcourse I have a lot of issues and i wont bore you with them.
If you ever want to talk about whatever or have questions feel free!

 

[Desperate_Soul]

Hello all,

I see I forgot to introduce myself as well here..
My name is Nathalie and I am from The The Netherlands. I am 28 ( 29 at the end of the month ) and have a love for women and cats..
I think the pussy is the common ground here.
Also play a lot of videogames to pass the time till I finally get a job or ctb
Offcourse I have a lot of issues and i wont bore you with them.
If you ever want to talk about whatever or have questions feel free!

Hi, Nathalie! A late introduction is better than no introduction, right? :)
I already see we have some things in common...
We both love pussy, we both are passing time, and we both have lots of issues!
I've got just one question! How did you choose your profile picture?

 

[Anyara]

I've got just one question! How did you choose your profile picture?

Its a puppet version of a drag Queen I am fan of called Bianca del Rio. I found her so called "mood" in the picture calling to me on a primal level.

 

[AndyCurious]

Hey all.. I'm just an average male, 48 from Northern Europe.. Most of my life has been tough, strickt parents, sexual abuse, been bullied most of my life, tried countless times to end it all, still walking on this planet, but hopefully one day I may find the guts to do full suspension hanging once and for all.. Fortunately I'm single, so no girlfriend will have to loose me.. I have barely contact with my family, so not a big loss there either, I doubt anyone will miss me, or find out I'm gone for days or weeks after... Much love ♡♡♡

 

[throwaway777]

hi all ! i am late too ... i am a depressed and very anxious girl with an infinite love for cats :33 ... emm ... i love music, cinema and yato from noragami (my profile pic:D) :33 ...ahh i almost forgot ... i want to die too :D ... i love you all <3... you are so kind and i feel part of something special with you so THANK U !!! <333

 

[Anyara]

hi all ! i am late too ... i am a depressed and very anxious girl with an infinite love for cats :33 .

If you ever want to Exchange cat pictures hit me up!! I love seeing other peoples random cat photo's or just endlessy talk about them ( no pressure offcourse!)

 

[ignominia]

Hello,

I'm from Mexico, i have 20 years old, i'm in college. I don't have a super bad life (althought it's very possible that i have mental issues but i tried to minimize the as much as i can) is just that i'm affraid of future, i feel miserable, i don't wanna be part of the system that i hate, i don't wanna betrayed myself, i don't wanna be a corrupted human being, i don't wanna be an old lady with no love for humankind, i prefer live by choice not as by condition. Death it's most libertarian and intimate thing that a human being could experience. Also I think that love is most powerfull and least common thing in the world.

I don't have a date yet, my favorite method so far is N but even that i'm living in Mexico i'm too lazy for do the search, the realistic option it is hanging.

Sorry for the grammatical and spelling mistakes that i could have.

 

[Swisher]

Hello all,

I see I forgot to introduce myself as well here..
My name is Nathalie and I am from The The Netherlands. I am 28 ( 29 at the end of the month ) and have a love for women and cats..
I think the pussy is the common ground here.
Also play a lot of videogames to pass the time till I finally get a job or ctb
Offcourse I have a lot of issues and i wont bore you with them.
If you ever want to talk about whatever or have questions feel free!

Feel free to bore me or share. I won't be bored.

 

[Swisher]

If you ever want to Exchange cat pictures hit me up!! I love seeing other peoples random cat photo's or just endlessy talk about them ( no pressure offcourse!)

Btw, I think you have something in your teeth.....kidding

 

[Jovaras]

31 male, kinda rushing to wrap thing up, the only thing left it is to find 400E (I have 200E) to order N and get out off here

 

[throwaway777]

If you ever want to Exchange cat pictures hit me up!! I love seeing other peoples random cat photo's or just endlessy talk about them ( no pressure offcourse!)

hey :3 id really love to :3333 ps. unfortunately i dont have one because my parents are allergic )); but i have an entire album of cat pictures that i have saved over the yearsXDD

 

[onewayroad]

31 male, kinda rushing to wrap thing up, the only thing left it is to find 400E (I have 200E) to order N and get out off here

Hi Jovaras. Have you considered other methods? Anesthetic gas (nitrogen/argon) is my chosen method due to the low cost and being approximately equal to N in most measures such as success rate and painlessness. I can't afford N either. My method is costing me ~220E.

 

[Jovaras]

Hi Jovaras. Have you considered other methods? Anesthetic gas (nitrogen/argon) is my chosen method due to the low cost and being approximately equal to N in most measures such as success rate and painlessness. I can't afford N either. My method is costing me ~220E.

1st thing in greece to order Nitrogen and Argon it is quite expensive and hard (around 400+E), and I really don't like the idea to be found with a bag on my head, If I could find someone to take the bag and bottle from my head and hide them, I would definitely consider this option but it is highly unlikely to find someone willing to help and risk his/her's life

 

[onewayroad]

1st thing in greece to order Nitrogen and Argon it is quite expensive and hard (around 400+E), and I really don't like the idea to be found with a bag on my head, If I could find someone to take the bag and bottle from my head and hide them, I would definitely consider this option but it is highly unlikely to find someone willing to help and risk his/her's life

Ah yeah the best method is always very different depending on what country you are from. Nembutal may be your best option. Anyway it is nice to meet you and welcome to the only place that you can tell the truth. I hope you enjoy your stay.

 

[Jovaras]

Ah yeah the best method is always very different depending on what country you are from. Nembutal may be your best option. Anyway it is nice to meet you and welcome to the only place that you can tell the truth. I hope you enjoy your stay.

I had 2 psychiatrists who told me what they understand and think what suicide it is justified in my case, and 1 of them even told me what he would kill him self long time ago if he was in my place

 

[onewayroad]

I had 2 psychiatrists who told me what they understand and think what suicide it is justified in my case, and 1 of them even told me what he would kill him self long time ago if he was in my place

My decision has never been validated in this way, just one person saying something like this to me would mean so much. I hope you can find peace when you need it.

 

[Jovaras]

My decision has never been validated in this way, just one person saying something like this to me would mean so much. I hope you can find peace when you need it.

why? what do you think is the reason behind not be validated?

 

[onewayroad]

why? what do you think is the reason behind not be validated?

In my country (Australia) no one in the medical system would have the courage to say that I might be right for fear of legal repercussions. And my friends and family have been so indoctrinated to the concept that suicide is never the answer that they will never support me.

 

[Jovaras]

In my country (Australia) no one in the medical system would have the courage to say that I might be right for fear of legal repercussions. And my friends and family have been so indoctrinated to the concept that suicide is never the answer that they will never support me.

here is exactly the same, they would never told such thing to anyone, but in the context they took the risk because it is really different case to anything they seen so far.
And in general I really can get across my point with people

 

[jizz676]

Hello,

I'm from Mexico, i have 20 years old, i'm in college. I don't have a super bad life (althought it's very possible that i have mental issues but i tried to minimize the as much as i can) is just that i'm affraid of future, i feel miserable, i don't wanna be part of the system that i hate, i don't wanna betrayed myself, i don't wanna be a corrupted human being, i don't wanna be an old lady with no love for humankind, i prefer live by choice not as by condition. Death it's most libertarian and intimate thing that a human being could experience. Also I think that love is most powerfull and least common thing in the world.

I don't have a date yet, my favorite method so far is N but even that i'm living in Mexico i'm too lazy for do the search, the realistic option it is hanging.

Sorry for the grammatical and spelling mistakes that i could have.

I would like to make a trip to Mexico so I could buy n there and die there

 

[Morbidreality]

Hi! You can call me C.
26 female from NY
I suffer from bipolar, borderline personality, generalised anxiety disorder, & PTSD- From numerous truamatic episodes. Last year I broke up & was finally freed by my brutally abusive boyfriend/pimp...was homeless for a bit, still using heroin untill I got into a methadone program & parents let me live with them again. I moved out when I was 16 to roam the streets, sell myself for drugs & to party... eventually I was raped numerous times and got a pimp....who then sold me around untill I escaped...into the hands of my abuser ex boyfriend.
Had a great childhood with parents that truly loved me & tried their best to understand my needs as a mentally ill child....
Probably some emotional abuse but that's just the benefits of having a Hispanic mother.
Went to numerous pysch wards as a minor & as a adult...
My best friend/ love of my life that I've known since 16 & who helped me leave my abusive ex(but also had an affair with him..?) Died this past June. I was angry. I was sad. I was empty. So I tried to OD on heroin....36 bags , 4 hours and some narcan- I'm alive and now greated with the excruciating pain of still being alive when I was so sure this was finally goodbye, that I would be united with her. We had a suicide pact for this upcoming January....
I want to CTB regardless of my best friend dying or not.
I've wanted to "sleep forever" since I was a child.
That's all I want- is to sleep forever. Is that so hard to ask? I know I may hurt my parents in the process but why can't they understand that I will be at peace, no longer suffering bc of the demons in my mind? I have to deal with them, not you ; mom & dad. So please, just let me go...don't you want me to be at peace?

 

[228]

hello i'm 228

i've got a cocktail of brain problems and i've been suicidal for a very very long time
however i'm a bit of a weird case due to my um obsession (?) with death and i'd be sad if i died in a way that was boring or unfulfilling, meaning i probably won't die anytime soon.
i expect to die young however

i'm isolated and lonely right now, as i moved and don't know anyone here, so i spend most of my time online or using substances as a coping mechanism

i like cute things (plushes and animals), edgy things, minimal electronic music, cardgames and philosophy.
i'm also teaching myself how to reverse engineer malware, i hope to become good enough at it to get an internship and maybe be less miserable (doubt it but it's worth a try i guess)

 

[Morning Angel]

I guess it's super late to do this but...

I'm a cis woman in my 30's. I'm self-euthanizing due to early stage cancer and brain damage. Also unable to take care of myself, no real support left, financial issues... the list goes on. You get the drift. It's most certainly a pointless and lost fight for a low quality of life. I will be using N.