S
Sobreviviente
Member
- Jun 4, 2022
- 60
My story
Hi everyone, so let me introduce myself. 28 years old male. Thought about suicide rarely in my life till the death of my father, who did partial hanging. 3 month later I jumped under the train in metro to commit suicide too, as we were extremely close, we achieved everything together and I couldn't imagine my life without him. He did it because he realized that my mom was cheating on him for about 7 years. And I was on her side, blaming him as he was an extremely bad father while I was a child, he was so rude and aggressive, I couldn't forgive that. But I must have forgiven, because last years he did a lot for me, we were more then friends, more then a son and a dad, we were like two pieces. So after his death I forgave everything and started to blame myself and finally committed suicide attempt which left me disabled, without both of my legs. Stupid act, I had everything in my life. Well, almost everything, I was alone, never had a relationship, but had money and my own apartment to live. Probably I should have gone to psychiatrist or psychologist. Now I have a chance to talk to them while in hospital, but it's too late, living without legs it's a disaster. Thinking about getting N or SN upon leaving this hospital, already have meto. But kind of afraid of LE visits, I'm in Europe, Baltic region.
Hi everyone, so let me introduce myself. 28 years old male. Thought about suicide rarely in my life till the death of my father, who did partial hanging. 3 month later I jumped under the train in metro to commit suicide too, as we were extremely close, we achieved everything together and I couldn't imagine my life without him. He did it because he realized that my mom was cheating on him for about 7 years. And I was on her side, blaming him as he was an extremely bad father while I was a child, he was so rude and aggressive, I couldn't forgive that. But I must have forgiven, because last years he did a lot for me, we were more then friends, more then a son and a dad, we were like two pieces. So after his death I forgave everything and started to blame myself and finally committed suicide attempt which left me disabled, without both of my legs. Stupid act, I had everything in my life. Well, almost everything, I was alone, never had a relationship, but had money and my own apartment to live. Probably I should have gone to psychiatrist or psychologist. Now I have a chance to talk to them while in hospital, but it's too late, living without legs it's a disaster. Thinking about getting N or SN upon leaving this hospital, already have meto. But kind of afraid of LE visits, I'm in Europe, Baltic region.