Venting Infuriated by being checked on

[BrontesA]

It always sets me off, every single time. I cannot rationalize why anybody would want to interact with me. I went dark on all my 'friends' from uni, burnt every bridge I could find, and now over the course of the last few months I've had several girls from my class texting me bullshit 'are you doing okay?' type messages, one even tried calling me. I pisses me off beyond words. Same goes with my parents, the best they can do is ask 'you feeling okay?' 'you've gotten very skinny' when it very fucking obviously is not okay, but not once have they pried further than that. Not like I'd budge even if they did, I'm not proficient enough in my native language to even slightly communicate with them on a topic like this, and anything I say will be shot down anyway cause of course they can't help but still treat me like a child. Surprise surprise, my father is one of those 'i dont believe in depression' people, so every time my state is brought up, their genius solutions are 'you should get a blood test done' 'you should take more vitamins', or my favorite, most astute observation: 'son, there isn't any joy in you anymore!' ...just that statement, not much else.

I know I'm taking all of this for granted, I get it, I know many people would kill to have some cute girl text them nice things and 'worry' for them or to have parents who care enough to ask, but I cannot find a single feeling for these peoples concerns. On top of that, it rouses genuine anger in me to hear these kinds of things. I can't find the exact words for how I feel about all this, but I just kinda wanted to put it out there, feeling extra shitty today so maybe that's why.

Does anyone else feel similar? I feel as thought I am 100% certain that I won't get anywhere by telling anyone about my situation.

 

[Passenger4224]

After I told my friend for the hudredth time I wasn't free during the weekend he asked if I was ok and I wanted to scream

 

[BrontesA]

After I told my friend for the hudredth time I wasn't free during the weekend he asked if I was ok and I wanted to scream

You'd think some people would put two and two together after enough repetition, but nooope. You could wear a sign around your neck with all your symptoms and you'll still get the same questions.

 

[valar_morghulis21]

No one checks on me, except for my mom. But yeah at this point I don't need no pity and lip service from people. All I need is a gun with bullet shot through my brain stem

 

[pepperfarmer]

Maybe you feel as though it's superficial, and that's why it pisses you off?

 

[DTWAFavor]

i have a few irls that i check up on knowing it would be a rainy day in hell before they did the same for me. And even then, when they do check on me, its to ask if they can vent. My parents check on me when they notice I'm not eating as much (which, really? I need to be stuffing my face to look ok?) just to then say i look better when i lose weight. I'm not the thinnest, nor am i the thickest, but damn