bpdbunnygirl
Member
- Sep 19, 2023
- 40
I don't know if my needing and craving for ctb is just because of my bpd and breaking up with my fp. I know realistically I should wait a month or so to make sure this is what I want 100% but right now I'm in so much emotional pain that I don't know if I can even wait it out. I can't handle living like this any longer. I'll always have bpd. it's not like this shit is going to ever go away anyway. I've been suicidal since before the age of 10. it's not like I can get into therapy because no one is taking patients because they're so booked up. I'm half tempted to admit myself into the hospital but I've heard bad things from people about psych wards and such so I'm not sure. all I know is right now I'm so desperate to ctb. I can't handle this pain anymore. I can't take it. what should I do? I feel like losing my fp is my last straw at this point.