shinitai_sh0jo

shinitai_sh0jo

Is it so selfish to want to feel a little better?
Dec 30, 2023
102
I have an accessible route for me to follow if I really decide to commit ctb this year or next year, but I'm always feeling indecisive about something specific: suicide letters/notes.

I feel like I have things I'd like to try to explain to some ppl who are important to me, but at the same time I feel like it wouldn't be enough. I'm honestly not sure, since is something I've always felt doubtful about...

Most people that I intended to let a letter or mention in the paper know of my suicidal ideation/thoughts, so it would be surprising but it wouldn't, at the same time.

Should I really start making one? Or just leave my phone unlocked for them to check whatever is inside? I honestly don't know, I'd appreciate any kind of thoughts about it.
 
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dggtscccvfd

Mage
Jun 1, 2023
563
I have an accessible route for me to follow if I really decide to commit ctb this year or next year, but I'm always feeling indecisive about something specific: suicide letters/notes.

I feel like I have things I'd like to try to explain to some ppl who are important to me, but at the same time I feel like it wouldn't be enough. I'm honestly not sure, since is something I've always felt doubtful about...

Most people that I intended to let a letter or mention in the paper know of my suicidal ideation/thoughts, so it would be surprising but it wouldn't, at the same time.

Should I really start making one? Or just leave my phone unlocked for them to check whatever is inside? I honestly don't know, I'd appreciate any kind of thoughts about it.
Personally, I see a note as esssential. I've written one to my family, one to friends, one for the coroner, and one for wider society. All In all it's around 4,500 words!
 
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shinitai_sh0jo

shinitai_sh0jo

Is it so selfish to want to feel a little better?
Dec 30, 2023
102
Personally, I see a note as esssential. I've written one to my family, one to friends, one for the coroner, and one for wider society. All In all it's around 4,500 words!
Dang, that sure looks huge. But yeah, writting it digitally looks like a good idea. Thank you for quoting to my post :)
 
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zeecen

Member
Mar 30, 2024
37
If you want to communicate anything to those in your life then I would recommend writing everything down. Digital or physical format, doesn't really matter.
 
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littlelungs

littlelungs

Wizard
Oct 21, 2018
634
Personally, I see a note as esssential. I've written one to my family, one to friends, one for the coroner, and one for wider society. All In all it's around 4,500 words!

I agree. It doesn't have to be long at all, but just enough to at least sum up what happened and why, and to express funeral wishes (if any).

I personally have written an entire autobiography, which I feel insufferable even saying, but that's the best way I can describe it. It started out as a simple note, and I really wish I could have just neatly listed out my reasons why and had that be it, but the suffering has just been going on for so long and there are a lot of different factors at play here, and I want to give the people who care about me something to work with in processing their grief, because whenever someone dies of suicide, people always want to know why. I know it's extra, it took me years to write it and it was extremely difficult (both due to chronic pain and illness and the subject matter in itself), but I'm glad that I did – this is my last chance to say what I need to say, and I think some lessons can be learned from what I went through and dealt with (on both a personal and systematic level), so I wanted to make it count.

Again, it obviously doesn't have to be a whole autobiography or anything, but I think that, if you're able to do so, leaving a note is important. Just my personal opinion.
 
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