Story Impulsive self-improvement

[wannabeasuperhero]

I was feeling super low over the weekend and stewing about how shit I think my life is, and I started to get jittery and impulsive. so I did something that was unpleasant and made me uncomfortable: I sent in a resume for a job that pays a little more than my own figuring it couldn't make life worse. putting myself into an uncomfortable/anxiety inducing situation scratched the self-harm itch, and I have nothing to lose just by applying. they've really liked me in the preliminary phone conversations, so I got an interview tomorrow morning :) if I don't get the job, I gained the experience of interviewing. if I do, then I get to make a bit more money and maybe relocate close to family!
I'm planning on using this diversion on myself again in the future. instead of doing something like SH, I'm going to use the restless energy to do something I find difficult but could ultimately improve my life, like working out or talking to an interesting stranger. I thought maybe someone else would be also interested in using this weird coping mechanism.

 

[carac]

I think this is kind of like just being "proactive" and something that I struggle with a lot myself. Like if I get into a tough situation instead of trying to work to overcome it, transverse it or take charge of the situation I just shrink away and try to avoid it. This just makes me stress out and obsess over it which is really damaging mentally. What you did sounds amazing.