I’m doing well at the moment but I know I will die by suicide one day

[sheepgirl]

I turned 23 a few days ago. I was 12 when I became suicidal and 13 when I first tried. I ordered SN a few months ago (very easily, where I live) but it backfired and my mum got it and disposed of it etc. I was already in the psych ward at the time but I've been discharged now. But I'm actually doing quite well mentally at the moment, I'd really like to be around for at least a few more years but I know for a fact I will die before I'm 30 by suicide. I'm autistic and suffer chronic mental illness so everyday life can be really difficult. I don't see me ever being able to exist normally and able to work enough to fully support myself. Anyway my goal is to try be stable for as long as I possibly can, while also knowing there's a 99% chance I'll die of suicide one day. It just feels inevitable to me. If someone gave me N right now I wouldn't actually take it, I'm not actively suicidal (which is nice) but it one day I'll say goodbye on my own terms. Anyone else?

 

[PrettyKitty]

Hello I suffer with mental illness too and some learning disabilities. I understand what you mean I started becoming suicidal and tried around the same age. I'm trying to hold on I mean I have for awhile but I also know I will die from suicide at some point your not alone. If you ever need somebody to talk to or a friend you can PM me much love!

 

[Idiotic_Idiot]

Felt this. Always kind of felt like I'd die before 25.

 

[aitouka]

There's nothing wrong with feeling like this. But please don't keep your eyes on one thing. If you want to live, stick with it as much as you can. The future is always uncertain.

 

[Kundalini Guy]

Most people with mental health conditions die by suicide, regardless if they are afraid of death or not. It just takes time to reach the point where you are not afraid of any kind of death, brutal or not. Just keep waiting and once your gut tells you it is time to depart you will know it.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Most people with mental health conditions die by suicide,

?

Only a minority of mentally ill people end up killing themselves...

 

[UKscotty]

Most people who are suicidal once will end up killing themselves in future.

One you wake up to the pointlessness and futility of life, you can never unlearn that truth.

 

[Kundalini Guy]

?

Only a minority of mentally ill people end up killing themselves...

It's definitely a majority and am talking about serious people with mental health conditions like Schizophrenia/Bipolar/Depression. Regardless, only time will tell if someone is ready to pass on, it's not a light decision.