Venting I’m actually done with life (fake sa and rape rumours)

[pluscat]

Hi, I've never posted on here so bear with me but I need to talk about this.
In the past week a girl has come forward accusing me of sa and saying I've been touching her while also saying I've been saying I wanted to rape her, I haven't done this there's no evidence I have she's spreading it around and I'm receiving threats from her other friends and she's also went to our school saying this shit.

This wouldn't be too bad but her best friend has backed her up in this and she's turned all my friends against me, which hit me hardest because I was actually starting to heal and enjoy life again.
Only one of my friends has stuck with me and she's told me everything this girl has done and been saying and it's absolutely disgusting, but other than her I'm friendless, my reputation is ruined and I don't see a point in life.

It's the weekend now but I can't go back to school not with all of them there, I can't move schools either because this girl is really popular and will just ruin my reputation there.

I really want to CTB this weekend but I'm very limited in what I can access, my only friend will be ok she has plenty of other friends I'll just thank her before I go, she'll be fine she's probably seen it coming for a long time.

But yeah other than that I just kinda want someone to see this and not be on the girl who's accusing me's side and maybe some CTB tips I live near some cliffs that are very high up so that's an option as well as partial hanging with an extension cord but I'm not sure.

Any advice about any of this would be vastly appreciated <3

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Damn, I'm sorry for your situation. Bullying often takes the form of spreading lies to gather popular support.

I would reconsider changing schools, maybe she isn't so petty as to make you unpopular at another school and things might be different. I'm sorry most of your friends abandoned you.

What's your family's take on this, are they supportive or not?

 

[the old man]

School rumours will always exist along with bullying, if you genuinely are innocent then try maybe to call her bluff, say you have spoken to your parents about this and they are so concerned about the possible outcome they have booked an appointment with a solicitor and there may be statements required by the police, but certainly don't get throwing yourself off a cliff .....just yet.

 

[deathslament]

School rumours will always exist along with bullying, if you genuinely are innocent then try maybe to call her bluff, say you have spoken to your parents about this and they are so concerned about the possible outcome they have booked an appointment with a solicitor and there may be statements required by the police, but certainly don't get throwing yourself off a cliff .....just yet.

Defending a defect and its lies.
Not surprised.

 

[escape_from_hell]

This is awful.
They do not need proof. It will be hard to defend yourself.
Who will everyone believe, that sweet innocent girl you were attacking or the disgusting rapist?

If it's at the level of just rumors and reputation and so on you are not totally done. You might have to take drastic measures like drop out and get alternative education or even move.

If the law is involved, it's basically a free way to just torture and kill someone for psychopaths, because that someone will be ruined forever with no chance to defend themselves. The proof will be their word against yours and you are the bad guy. Sorry man.

Edit: I am not a lawyer or anything though that's just a doom statement.
Reality is you can still seek lawyers and stuff like that if it really comes to it. Not saying it is not a valid reason to CTB but it sounds like you are young so please explore your options to fight it fully, let your family and maybe others know exactly the situation and what was really said. You will feel better with allies if you can get them.

 

[the old man]

Defending a defect and its lies.
Not surprised.

I'm happy to ignore that remark until your mature enough to have a valid comment or old enough to learn to read properly

 

[DreamEnd]

I'm happy to ignore that remark until your mature enough to have a valid comment or old enough to learn to read properly

this dude wished for the girl to be hung. He must have deleted his comment or the mods got to it.

 

[Guy Smiley]

Please don't kill yourself over a false accusation. If you truly didn't do any of the things she is accusing you of, then you have nothing to worry about from a legal standpoint (you are innocent until proven guilty). As for your "friends", if they so quickly abandoned you based on nothing other than one person's accusations, then they were shit friends and you're better off without them. Maybe some of them are decent friends who just did a stupid thing, and if so they'll come back to you and apologize for what they did.

 

[Raichu]

Same happened with me last year when a girl accused me of forcing her to get physical with me, while in reality I didn't even touch her. And that too when we were dating and she was too cozy with some other guy. These false rumors and stuff are pretty cheap and they last only for 2 to 3months. If she can't substantiate her claim, she has no chance to ruin you. Stand strong king. And talking of your friends, I would just say that it's better that they are gone now as you have seen their true colours. It's so sad that some women use the same law made to protect them to ruin others' lives.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

If you kill yourself over this, everyone will think you're guilty for certain.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

From the perspective of people that have had their mutuals turned against them when they broke up, you're not alone in losing friends, even if it wasn't from a spiteful ex. Most of us that have gone through that might have repressed that memory by now. So I agree with the perspective that friends that turned on you, perhaps those friends never had good intentions in the first place.

I don't know if that makes it any easier losing those friends, but I don't think you should ctb over false accusations too, so I hope it does.

 

[damyon]

I feel truly sorry for you, OP. Unfortunately, this is how the world still works.

If you kill yourself over this, everyone will think you're guilty for certain.

I agree with this. Even if you just change schools, people will also "confirm" in their heads that you are guilty.

If you are that determined to CTB, I would seek legal support in this case first.
While it might seem that everything is terrible now, you still have a chance to prove innocence (I wish people would presume innocence as it should be...).
You have one friend who is still supporting you. I assume you also have a family who believes that you are innocent.
So you still have a chance, OP. Don't give up just yet.

 

[TransientEternal]

There should be a jail sentence attached to intentional false rape accusations.

 

[Darkover]

you can get her done for sexual harassment

 

[the old man]

this dude wished for the girl to be hung. He must have deleted his comment or the mods got to it.

Yes I noticed that to, I thought maybe they were just having a bad night until I read through some of their previous replies.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

There should be a jail sentence attached to intentional false rape accusations.

There is.
Perverting the course of justice has a maximum sentence of life imprisonment.

Usually the penalty is several months of prison or a fine, if tried and convicted. This is if they take their complaints to the police. If they don't contact the police, then I think you would have to take them to court for slander, or libel if written. So the prior advice of calling their bluff and involving a solicitor may actually work, I don't know.

In this case, they're not claiming rape, so they cannot prove it, but I don't know how it could be disproven either.

 

[SexyIncél]

If you're comfortable enough to answer, what was this gal's motivations? Why has she targeted you, and what was the nature of your relationship? Did she build these rumors around any event?

 

[UKscotty]

She sounds like she has her own issues. A few years in prison for perverting the course of justice will give her time to reflect.

If you genuinely didn't do it, there will be no evidence and it will be you vs her.

Stay strong and stable and her side will crumble and the truth will come to light.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I think you should look into suing for deformation of character with your parents. At least sounding like you are prepared to fight it may make her back down.

I'm so sorry though. I was accused of stuff I hadn't done by a (suspected) narcissistic family member. Not as serious as this but, it was still awful. I think people who make false accusations should serve the sentence that crime would have resulted in. You can destroy someone's life by accusing them of things.

I guess that's not always practical though. Sexual assualt cases can't always be proved and, genuine people shouldn't be dissuaded from coming forward. Still, it's shocking what some people do. Sending people to jail for rapes they didn't commit etc.

I hope you can sort this out but I don't blame you for just wanting out of it all.

 

[3/4Dead]

Did she build these rumors around any event?

I really wanna second this, because if she's flexing real events to appear malicious then it becomes a he said/she said rather than outright false accusation and it will be much easier to clear yourself, especially legally,

 

[pluscat]

If you're comfortable enough to answer, what was this gal's motivations? Why has she targeted you, and what was the nature of your relationship? Did she build these rumors around any event?

I have no idea, we were just friends and we hadn't had any arguments or disagreements over anything. I'd only found out about any of it when her friends started threatening to smash my face in and jump me so I think it's completely out of malicious intent because I can't see any reasons otherwise why she'd do this.

If you kill yourself over this, everyone will think you're guilty for certain.

I can definitely see that but I genuinely can't see anyway forward otherwise, it's completely destroyed my mental health and I don't know what to do and I don't see a point in living because literally no one other than one person believes me, which just shocks me because I know she has no proof of me doing anything to her but I do wish there was something to be done, but it looks as if I'm stuck in a box with no way to go forward without committing.

Same happened with me last year when a girl accused me of forcing her to get physical with me, while in reality I didn't even touch her. And that too when we were dating and she was too cozy with some other guy. These false rumors and stuff are pretty cheap and they last only for 2 to 3months. If she can't substantiate her claim, she has no chance to ruin you. Stand strong king. And talking of your friends, I would just say that it's better that they are gone now as you have seen their true colours. It's so sad that some women use the same law made to protect them to ruin others' lives.

Thank you so much, I really hope that's the case and people see through it soon, but it's nice to know someone relates because I've never heard of this happening in real life before, and I assume that's why so many people don't believe me because, who would be so horrible and malicious that they'd spread sa and rape rumours around that aren't true?

School rumours will always exist along with bullying, if you genuinely are innocent then try maybe to call her bluff, say you have spoken to your parents about this and they are so concerned about the possible outcome they have booked an appointment with a solicitor and there may be statements required by the police, but certainly don't get throwing yourself off a cliff ....

Yeah I do want to want to do all that and more because she could do it to someone else in the future, but I'm not sure if it's the right course of action because even though I've not spoken to family, I have with my school because she told them, and they are basically treating it as a rumour between friends and have given me a warning saying, they'll escalate it if they hear about it again but aren't taking further action, so I don't know if it's appropriate to start escalating it to the legal system because that's how they reacted to it and I've not made it look worse in my post than what's happened irl so I'm not sure.

As for calling her out for it, I would be very happy to do so and would've a long time ago. However, I've been told by her male friends that I'll get jumped and my face smashed in if I speak to her again and I strongly believe they know where I live because the girl who started all of this knows where I live, so for that I'm a bit powerless because doing that would result in stuff I don't even want to think about.

 

[pluscat]

I think you should look into suing for deformation of character with your parents. At least sounding like you are prepared to fight it may make her back down.

I'm so sorry though. I was accused of stuff I hadn't done by a (suspected) narcissistic family member. Not as serious as this but, it was still awful. I think people who make false accusations should serve the sentence that crime would have resulted in. You can destroy someone's life by accusing them of things.

I guess that's not always practical though. Sexual assualt cases can't always be proved and, genuine people shouldn't be dissuaded from coming forward. Still, it's shocking what some people do. Sending people to jail for rapes they didn't commit etc.

I hope you can sort this out but I don't blame you for just wanting out of it all.

Thank you, I know how both sides feel as a victim of sa myself it just shocks me even more someone could do this for no reason, because it destroys the credibility of real victims, I'm not really sure if taking her to court/getting police involved would fix it, because I don't want to bother my parents and others over it and most of all I kinda want it to blow over and be forgotten about that's why I was saying I wanted to CTB because I don't think stuff like this can just go away especially if one side has far more support than the other but I think I might have to give it some time and thought.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Thank you, I know how both sides feel as a victim of sa myself it just shocks me even more someone could do this for no reason, because it destroys the credibility of real victims, I'm not really sure if taking her to court/getting police involved would fix it, because I don't want to bother my parents and others over it and most of all I kinda want it to blow over and be forgotten about that's why I was saying I wanted to CTB because I don't think stuff like this can just go away especially if one side has far more support than the other but I think I might have to give it some time and thought.

It's terribly difficult and I would agree- there is that fear that mud sticks.

From what you've said, it sounds as if she has done this before- to others. I'd definitely be talking to them to see what happened with them and what they did about it.

I'm sorry you are going through this.

 

[unabletocope]

This is terrible but as other people have said you're in a position to do something about it if it's just people saying stuff and you haven't had a thing with this girl. youre still in school, you need to complain about it to the school, they wont automatically believe her and to some extent getting legal advice will help you as well, i genuinely believe you can take this one on. Good luck and keep people informed about what's happening

 

[tbroken]

I guess you are male right?
Can your friend or this girl possibly envy you for some reason that is not related to the rape?
Are you good at school? Are you rich? Something like that?

 

[pluscat]

From the perspective of people that have had their mutuals turned against them when they broke up, you're not alone in losing friends, even if it wasn't from a spiteful ex. Most of us that have gone through that might have repressed that memory by now. So I agree with the perspective that friends that turned on you, perhaps those friends never had good intentions in the first place.

I don't know if that makes it any easier losing those friends, but I don't think you should ctb over false accusations too, so I hope it does.

But it's so sad I've lost friends who have told me they were so happy I never CBD in the past just for them to do stuff like this without even asking my side, it just compels me even more to do it but there's a positive in the fact it's made everyone who secretly hated me and didn't actually care about me come out and show their true self.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

Hi, I've never posted on here so bear with me but I need to talk about this.
In the past week a girl has come forward accusing me of sa and saying I've been touching her while also saying I've been saying I wanted to rape her, I haven't done this there's no evidence I have she's spreading it around and I'm receiving threats from her other friends and she's also went to our school saying this shit.

This wouldn't be too bad but her best friend has backed her up in this and she's turned all my friends against me, which hit me hardest because I was actually starting to heal and enjoy life again.
Only one of my friends has stuck with me and she's told me everything this girl has done and been saying and it's absolutely disgusting, but other than her I'm friendless, my reputation is ruined and I don't see a point in life.

It's the weekend now but I can't go back to school not with all of them there, I can't move schools either because this girl is really popular and will just ruin my reputation there.

I really want to CTB this weekend but I'm very limited in what I can access, my only friend will be ok she has plenty of other friends I'll just thank her before I go, she'll be fine she's probably seen it coming for a long time.

But yeah other than that I just kinda want someone to see this and not be on the girl who's accusing me's side and maybe some CTB tips I live near some cliffs that are very high up so that's an option as well as partial hanging with an extension cord but I'm not sure.

Any advice about any of this would be vastly appreciated <3

Sounds absolutely horrible, to be accused of rape is among one of the worst things to be accused of but some girls just don´t know how bad this is I truly feel sorry for you and I understand why you would want to ctb over this but as @Darkover said you could sue her although if I were you and had the will and means to it I would sue her over defamation, I of course don´t know if you have the money for it or if you can get a laywer anyways because I am certain you would win this in court if what you say is true she has no evidence whatsoever yet she spread false rumors about you which makes your life a living hell that is a classic defamation case I really think you should do this even if you decide to ctb anyways to at least get a little justice back, she will be branded a liar which would make it for an even "better" suicide since you will have been declared innocent although I am aware that people will always wonder if it really happened so your reputation is ruined regardless but at least you can get this girl branded a liar just some thoughts on this.

 

[ForgottenTomb]

That sounds awful to go through, just awful. Trying to ruin someone's life by lying about SA is unforgivable behaviour and there is no justification for it regardless of whatever issues she might have.

You are not alone. There have been numerous cases where people have had people around them and even their own friends turned against them through false SA rumours with (almost) no one to support them. It's completely normal to feel hopeless and alone in this situation. It's completely normal to have suicidal thoughts when this happens to you.

She is trying to destroy your life, don't give her the satisfaction. Do not let evil win. Maybe she will feel guilty when you ctb, but then she will just find another person to destroy because she can't help herself. She might walk around freely without consequences and be supported by people right now, but there is no doubt that she is miserable if she is doing all this, and on top of that, karma will hit her too.

I wish you a lot of strength. May you look back at this in the future and sigh with relief that it isn't affecting your life any more. It's completely understandable to think that your life is over, but there have been people who have successfully moved on from this, as life-damaging as this can be, I hope it will be you.