If you've already made up your mind to CTB, what keeps you waiting?

[Wants-To-End]

I'm just wondering, to those who do plan to leave, what keeps you here until then?

Recently I feel like I've just been waiting for the right time, my mind has been fully made up since the beginning of last year.

Got my note made in the form of a video, got my method ready to go at a moments notice, got things set up to make a quick exit at any time, loose ends and all.

So....what am I waiting for?

Well, what are YOU waiting for is what I'm asking. I'm not encouraging anyone to "hurry up, get on with it" or anything, I'd never do that, you make your exit when and if you want.

But to those who have made their plans absolute, what keeps you here?

Maybe just the last shreds of hope? Praying something will happen, someone will notice the subtle hints, something will finally change.....

I'm curious to hear what you have to say....or...type.

The one and only reason I am waiting is because of lack of resource, I am not scared of death, but I am scared of pain, looking for painless way to end my life (for which I don't have a access right now), nothing else

 

[gvmi]

I'm a coward, and pretty much don't really want to go... I wish things could magically get better, I wouldn't mind living if I wasn't in this constant suffering.
So I'm stalling, waiting for SOMETHING to happen, consuming drugs that make me feel temporarily better, and seeing if things get better.

Fear of failure, fear of success.

that's a beautiful way to put it.