Venting If there was no yesterday, I wouldn't wish to never see tomorrow.

[AbsurdAbyss]

I feel like there's always so much more I could say but for some reason cannot - my words seem to betray me as much as I trust them. Every time I want to say something, I'm reminded of all the things that have gone wrong and could go wrong every time I've ever said it and wil say it. A burden that gets tougher to bear with each passing day. Was it miscommunication or a misunderstanding, was it me or them? Haunted by endless questions and the answers doesn't even matter because we've had this conversation before and its always already over before it begins. I don't want to be remembered - I just want to be recognized, even if for a moment, as I am. I don't want to be seen - I just want to disappear, as if I never existed to anybody who couldn't recognize me. An impossibility as long as I exist - people only ever see what they want to see. Drowning in failed dreams and dead memories, I'm left with self hatred to the point of self annihilation - I hope my death brings an end to this mess that is my life. If any of this makes sense to you and you want nothing more than death - PM me if you want, I don't want to be (alone) here any more than you do.

 

[sos]

seems like you're in a position in which you've not only lost trust in the world, but in yourself as well

and that sure does suck

i do hope that you find peace in some kind of way

whether that be by catching the bus, or perhaps finding a path to happiness

 

[Randy Savage]

I'm sorry you're feeling this way. People are shit, and the memories you make with them hurt so much when you realize you'll never get that again.
Wishing you well, I hope you find your way out of this.