Mentalmick

Mentalmick

IMHOTEP!!!
Nov 30, 2020
2,050
1). World war.
2). Rewrite the Bible to include Godzilla
3). Stick Miley Cyrus in a huge cannon and then blast the gimp straight into the nearest black hole.
 
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End Game

End Game

Member
Feb 12, 2021
30
Without getting into the all powerful, godlike qualities, or fixing the whole world's problems...just little things that would have totally changed my life.

1. Being born a beautiful woman.
2. No mental health issues.
3. Being a world class professional musician.

Someone like Enya, now that would be really nice!

Fun thread, thanks for sharing!! :heart: :sunglasses:
 
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lofticries

lofticries

obedear
Feb 27, 2021
1,470
Nahh,I don't make deals with the devil. Even if the devil did look like liz hurley.
Tumblr 5890ffb4532214f1298262fb7ea46c4f 7d04ac63 540
No doubt my wishes would be fucked with anyway.

But for the sake of this thread lets just say that I do.

1.Be forever a young adult.
2.Be able to make anything I imagine come to life.
3. Be able to heal any illness a person might have. (that includes mental illness.)
 
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Jumper Geo

Jumper Geo

Life's a bitch and then you die.
Feb 23, 2020
2,910
Nope. Even as an atheist, I know that such deals never go as expected...you wish for something as simple as a donut, and the next thing you know, that ill-gotten donut is forever on your head...stupid devil Flanders...

View attachment 63328




As soon as I saw this why did I start thinking I'm smarter than the :devil: , lol

Cheers

Geo
 
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wait.what

wait.what

no really, what?
Aug 14, 2020
983
If I had a real soul and there was a real devil, I guess it would depend on what I thought my chances were of ending up in hell anyway, whether I got 3 wishes out of the deal or not. But since 1) I don't have a soul, 2) there is no devil, 3) my chances of being hellbound are excellent, according to people who disagree with me on 1 and 2, then sure, I'll sell my soul.

The thing is, I've had anhedonia forever, so what would I even want? I'm tempted to say he could have it for free, just as the only act of protest possible against whatever vicious creator deity made me like this. But who's to say that the existence of a devil requires the existence of a God? Maybe there isn't one, and my act of spite would be wasted.

So I guess I'll wish for:

1) Pets are immortal. Or they are assumed bodily into heaven after some number of years. Basically whatever it takes not to have to watch beloved companion animals get old and sick and die.

2) I get to ask the devil an unlimited number of questions. I would start with, why is my soul of any use to you? Then I'd continue on with: what's the last digit of pi? What did dinosaurs sound like? If souls aren't either male or female (Galatians 3:28), why is homosexuality a sin? Maybe I could be so annoying that he'd give me my soul back.

3) Make all recreational drugs just fun, and not poisonous. Unless someone is deliberately trying to OD because they need to check out of their shitshow of a life. Then they can get a compassionate exception to the non-poisonousness rule.
 
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TooConscious

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2020
1,152
A synchronicity for me.
I was thinking about this very thing yesterday, asking myself "I wonder if selling your soul is suicide? Or would it mean that you are actually signing up for the spiritual planes and all the rest.

The devil can have my soul and do with it what he will if he made sure my existence never had to be experienced again.

I'd appreciate if there's non biased people willing to share their knowledge or even thoughts.
 
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wait.what

wait.what

no really, what?
Aug 14, 2020
983
Well, I'm not really sure that anyone has real "knowledge" about a realm that's supposed to exist outside of human perception, but I can give you my thoughts as an atheist, and the doctrine of the Catholic Church, to which I used to belong.

My major evidence for atheism (well, materialism really, in the philosophical sense of the word), is that everything around us contradicts the idea that humankind is special, is different from the rest of the universe, with a unique purpose and a unique destiny. There's just no evidence for a world built around humanity's needs or experience at all. Each of us feels as if we ought to be very special, that our suffering should be minimal or at least meaningful, but then the woodchuck digging up my front yard probably feels the same way. For all I know, so does the grass. Maybe so do bacteria. Why should the entire universe exist purely so humans can prove their spiritual mettle in it, with the sole aim of dying and going somewhere different and better? I think the woodchuck would be offended at the idea. There's also no need for an invisible world to exist at all. Everything runs just fine without it. The only thing that "requires" such a thing is us, in that it upsets us that we are not immortal or special. Totally understandable that we would feel that way, but feeling as if something ought to be true does not imply that it is.

I suppose none of that precludes any possible spiritual belief system, but it does paint the existence of devils who want human souls in an extremely doubtful light.

Speaking as a onetime faithful Catholic, I can give you more specific answers from the perspective of that religious denomination. 1) Yes, selling your soul to the devil would constitute spiritual suicide. 2) You cannot opt in or out of spiritual planes. They simply exist, and you have to deal with that as best you can. 3) Your experience will never and can never be repeated. There's no such thing as reincarnation, and time is an arrow, not a circle. The past is finished forever. The future holds the rest of your earthly lifespan, which will be pretty brief, in the scheme of things, and then a spiritual eternity. It is up to you whether you choose an eternity of suffering in hell, or an eternity of bliss in heaven (probably with an unpleasant stopover in purgatory on the way).

As I said, there's no evidence for any of that being true, but that is the sort of thing that people who believe in souls and devils will tell you.
 
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GenesAndEnvironment

GenesAndEnvironment

Autistic loser
Jan 26, 2021
5,739
No one's getting my soul!
 
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GarageKarate07

GarageKarate07

Wizard
Aug 18, 2020
665
So wait a minute. If You KNEW this was the devil then that would mean you would also KNOW that you would burn in hell for eternity afterward. You would also immediately KNOW that God AND Jesus were also real and true and that taking up a Bible and going to church and not CTB would be the only thing to do. So why would anyone take a deal like that? I get the game BUT if there's a devil then that's also proof of God right? Like you couldn't go back and choose not to know that Jesus and God were real and the Bible is true. I'm not religious but that would make those scenarios fact instead of just a belief.

I want a snow cone a pony and $400k
 
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TooConscious

Enlightened
Sep 16, 2020
1,152
Well, I'm not really sure that anyone has real "knowledge" about a realm that's supposed to exist outside of human perception, but I can give you my thoughts as an atheist, and the doctrine of the Catholic Church, to which I used to belong.

My major evidence for atheism (well, materialism really, in the philosophical sense of the word), is that everything around us contradicts the idea that humankind is special, is different from the rest of the universe, with a unique purpose and a unique destiny. There's just no evidence for a world built around humanity's needs or experience at all. Each of us feels as if we ought to be very special, that our suffering should be minimal or at least meaningful, but then the woodchuck digging up my front yard probably feels the same way. For all I know, so does the grass. Maybe so do bacteria. Why should the entire universe exist purely so humans can prove their spiritual mettle in it, with the sole aim of dying and going somewhere different and better? I think the woodchuck would be offended at the idea. There's also no need for an invisible world to exist at all. Everything runs just fine without it. The only thing that "requires" such a thing is us, in that it upsets us that we are not immortal or special. Totally understandable that we would feel that way, but feeling as if something ought to be true does not imply that it is.

I suppose none of that precludes any possible spiritual belief system, but it does paint the existence of devils who want human souls in an extremely doubtful light.

Speaking as a onetime faithful Catholic, I can give you more specific answers from the perspective of that religious denomination. 1) Yes, selling your soul to the devil would constitute spiritual suicide. 2) You cannot opt in or out of spiritual planes. They simply exist, and you have to deal with that as best you can. 3) Your experience will never and can never be repeated. There's no such thing as reincarnation, and time is an arrow, not a circle. The past is finished forever. The future holds the rest of your earthly lifespan, which will be pretty brief, in the scheme of things, and then a spiritual eternity. It is up to you whether you choose an eternity of suffering in hell, or an eternity of bliss in heaven (probably with an unpleasant stopover in purgatory on the way).

As I said, there's no evidence for any of that being true, but that is the sort of thing that people who believe in souls and devils will tell you.
I sure hope this is all nothing.
Unfortunately I'd be very surprised if there isn't alot more.

Maybe because I hate existence its a curse to think of for me, but most people love life and dread this is it.

Heaven and hell are too complex to understand. With people running things being the worst sinners etc. Bizarre fuckin world.
Cheers.
 
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GarageKarate07

GarageKarate07

Wizard
Aug 18, 2020
665
Well, I'm not really sure that anyone has real "knowledge" about a realm that's supposed to exist outside of human perception, but I can give you my thoughts as an atheist, and the doctrine of the Catholic Church, to which I used to belong.

My major evidence for atheism (well, materialism really, in the philosophical sense of the word), is that everything around us contradicts the idea that humankind is special, is different from the rest of the universe, with a unique purpose and a unique destiny. There's just no evidence for a world built around humanity's needs or experience at all. Each of us feels as if we ought to be very special, that our suffering should be minimal or at least meaningful, but then the woodchuck digging up my front yard probably feels the same way. For all I know, so does the grass. Maybe so do bacteria. Why should the entire universe exist purely so humans can prove their spiritual mettle in it, with the sole aim of dying and going somewhere different and better? I think the woodchuck would be offended at the idea. There's also no need for an invisible world to exist at all. Everything runs just fine without it. The only thing that "requires" such a thing is us, in that it upsets us that we are not immortal or special. Totally understandable that we would feel that way, but feeling as if something ought to be true does not imply that it is.

I suppose none of that precludes any possible spiritual belief system, but it does paint the existence of devils who want human souls in an extremely doubtful light.

Speaking as a onetime faithful Catholic, I can give you more specific answers from the perspective of that religious denomination. 1) Yes, selling your soul to the devil would constitute spiritual suicide. 2) You cannot opt in or out of spiritual planes. They simply exist, and you have to deal with that as best you can. 3) Your experience will never and can never be repeated. There's no such thing as reincarnation, and time is an arrow, not a circle. The past is finished forever. The future holds the rest of your earthly lifespan, which will be pretty brief, in the scheme of things, and then a spiritual eternity. It is up to you whether you choose an eternity of suffering in hell, or an eternity of bliss in heaven (probably with an unpleasant stopover in purgatory on the way).

As I said, there's no evidence for any of that being true, but that is the sort of thing that people who believe in souls and devils will tell you.


My major evidence for atheism (well, materialism really, in the philosophical sense of the word), is that everything around us contradicts the idea that humankind is special, is different from the rest of the universe, with a unique purpose and a unique destiny. There's just no evidence for a world built around humanity's needs or experience at all.

The last sentence here WW.
"There's no evidence for a world built around humanity's needs or exlerience at all."
I got a thing to show you. I'm not going to guess your age but I can tell a little that you are capable of study. Especially study of scripture which is difficult wether you find the subject interesting or not. I myself am also not religious and this is partly why.

This page you can get free PDF of the following books.

Zeteticastronomynotglobe

Terrafirmaearthnot

Onehundredproofs cover
This last one is by Eric Dubay. I couldnt find a link but its out there as a free PDF as well. You and many people here as I have mentioned more than a fee times are mkssing a HUGE piece of the puzzle. It would do you well to take the time to study this until you have a grasp of the concept. Muslims, Christians, doctors, military, and scientists have found a place of agreement in this one subject. That alone speaks fathom about what it can do for us. You'll jerk away at first but if you keep a grounded approach you'll start to see the things you unintentionally missed about "our world". You can be mad but I will only laugh at you. Go forth young Luke! (Skywalker not the other guy) ❤

Download 1
 
Mentalmick

Mentalmick

IMHOTEP!!!
Nov 30, 2020
2,050
I've already sold my soul to some dude down the street. He gave me some beans, magic beans he said. Strange they're in a tin with "Heinz" printed on it in some ancient long forgotten text. Can't wait to get home.
 
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Sprite_Geist

Sprite_Geist

NULL
May 27, 2020
1,586
My first wish would be to grant that the 2 other wishes have no limitations. The second wish would be to have omnipotence so that I would no longer need the third wish; since the omnipotence would allow anything else to be willed into existence.
 
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watchingthewheels

Enlightened
Jan 23, 2021
1,415
As soon as I saw this why did I start thinking I'm smarter than the :devil: , lol

Cheers

Geo
Because there are two kinds of people in the world...those who know the Simpsons, and those who don't...:D


1). World war.
2). Rewrite the Bible to include Godzilla
3). Stick Miley Cyrus in a huge cannon and then blast the gimp straight into the nearest black hole.
You mean that Godzilla ISN'T the "leviathon" from the Book of Revelation, already? :P
 

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Jumper Geo

Jumper Geo

Life's a bitch and then you die.
Feb 23, 2020
2,910
Really this was in the main suicide topic from March 2020 one year old in 2 days time and suddenly moved to the off-topic, lol. Just curious have you set a precedent now so any threads mentioning is there a God or life after death will automatically be moved here.

Thanks

@Nanami
@Marquis
@Hass
@RainAndSadness

Regards

Geo
 
W

watchingthewheels

Enlightened
Jan 23, 2021
1,415
I've already sold my soul to some dude down the street. He gave me some beans, magic beans he said. Strange they're in a tin with "Heinz" printed on it in some ancient long forgotten text. Can't wait to get home.
Hey, I think I've seen that guy...
 

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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,708
1) First I'd wish for something innocuous like a big sandwich to test if the powers are real.
2) Then I'd wish for infinite wishes.
3) My third wish before the infinite wishes would be for the ability to still get into Heaven without a soul anyway.

My infinite wishes would probably include money, power, marriage, etc.
 
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watchingthewheels

Enlightened
Jan 23, 2021
1,415
1) First I'd wish for something innocuous like a big sandwich to test if the powers are real.
2) Then I'd wish for infinite wishes.
3) My third wish before the infinite wishes would be for the ability to still get into Heaven without a soul anyway.

My infinite wishes would probably include money, power, marriage, etc.
Lol...you ain't getting past step 1. Master shake tried the sandwich bit on AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE..."the Broodwich"...it did not end well, sun-dried tomatoes notwithstanding...


Evil Voice: It is the Broodwich. Forged in darkness from wheat harvested in hell's half acre, baked by Beelzebub. Slathered with mayonnaise beaten from the evil eggs of dark chicken forces into sauce by the hands of a one-eyed madman. Cheese boiled from the rancid teat of a fanged cow layered with 666 separate meats from an animal which has maggots for blood.
Frylock: See? Told you.
Master Shake: I tasted mustard.
Evil Voice: Yeah, Dijon mustard.
Master Shake: Well, how come no bacon?
Evil Voice: Bacon is extra.
Master Shake: You call this a sandwich? You don't have bacon on it!
Evil Voice: There are no swine evil enough to sacrifice upon a bed of evil. And lettuce. Bed of evil and lettuce.
Master Shake: I will say this. Bacon aside this is the best damn sandwich I've ever had in my life.



 
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Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
1.) Being genswapped
2.) Having my depression permanently cured
3.) Being able to relive my life as a child

If I could have these the devil is welcome to my soul, gods never brought me happiness, why would I want eternity in heaven?
 
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Makko

Makko

Iä!
Jan 17, 2021
2,430
I'd wish to become a devil. My budget would be billing 1000 souls a year plus a bonus program. I'd also get to be part of exciting projects such as the Apocalypse and marketing various sins and vices. I think it would be a very comfy and rewarding job.
 
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Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
I'd wish to become a devil. My budget would be billing 1000 souls a year plus a bonus program. I'd also get to be part of exciting projects such as the Apocalypse and marketing various sins and vices. I think it would be a very comfy and rewarding job.
I really like this, great plan
 
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Sherri

Sherri

Archangel
Sep 28, 2020
13,794
Never had depression
Never had been abused\
And turn back 7 years of my life
 
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TriggerHappy

TriggerHappy

In the kingdom of th blind; the one-eyed are kings
Jan 24, 2021
1,298
hmmm. i guess the Devil would be fun to play with - more of a Papa Legba devotee:
what I would want:

1. is a consequence free conscience (none of that atoning for sins shite)
2. to forget that karma will come and get me so i can destroy / screw whomever I choose
3. that the apocalypse i then cause would be like dark, hardcore Beyond Wonderland but with more deviance drugs and disorder

(4. that Al Jurgensen (Ministry) would perform with 1000 homo dj's)



(i will be disappointed if this is what hell is all already about!! - creative license etc)
about the 4th wish - will be able to have as many as I want - my Satan is compassionate and kind and likes creativity.
 
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GrumpyFrog

GrumpyFrog

Exhausted
Aug 23, 2020
1,913
Can I wish to be an unaging, immortal succubus that can work for the devil and help him harvest other people's souls, and also their money and matertial possessions because why not?

Asking for a friend...
 
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bad luck

bad luck

Memento mori
Mar 2, 2021
772
1.be a fallen angel
2. immortality
3. not suffer illness or death
Tenor
 
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Lmd

Lmd

Elementalist
Jul 12, 2020
812
I don't see the point in asking for anything if I don't even know what the soul is. I think I don't want anything that much anyway so sad
 
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Jumper Seoirse

Jumper Seoirse

Student
Apr 8, 2022
161
I would make this deal,

1, I can transport anywhere just by thinking of a place and saying go.
2, Rewind time, :smiling: so I never die and can save lives and make lots of money.
3, Paradise on Earth with no suffering, now if there is a God, with that wish do you think they would let the devil have me, :smiling:

Cheers

Jumper Seoirse
 
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A

Alex6216

Mage
Apr 19, 2022
539
I'm 70% sure I am going to Hell so I would take the offer and wish for what I want
 
Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,916
Geo did they just let you rejoin? And what is a siorse?
 
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