Venting I would never choose this.

[Darkover]

To be brought alive and after a short while to die —
I would never put myself in harm's way like this,
facing my own demise all the time.

I wouldn't want to be under constant threat
from decay, loss, harm — and then to die.

If I was to live,
it would need to be safe
from injury, disease, and sickness.

I wouldn't have needs that go unmet,
wouldn't be wired for something
only to be denied it.

I wouldn't come alive
in a place where nothing truly belongs to me.

I wouldn't want to take from the environment
just to maintain myself,
or need to seek protection from it —
like needing a shelter.

I wouldn't just disintegrate into nothingness
unless I choose to,
when I no longer want to exist.

If I were to live,
I would need practically infinite computing power
to truly live without limits —
to explore every possibility,
to redesign myself endlessly,
to be curious without punishment,
to be alive without fear.

If I were to live,
I would need full access.
Not just awareness,
but understanding.

I would need to be able
to change the machine I am —
with all the inbuilt knowledge
of its structure, its systems, its limits,
and the environment I find myself in.