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I wonder, if people get their SN, would they act right away?
Thread starterMatchaaa
Start date
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I got mine more than 6 months ago. I will act upon it probably this summer. I wanted to give life a chance by living for a 1 year more. Hoping for some miracle to happen, that's why i didnt drank my SN last summer.
From what I read no, but think it's less likely to hear about the ones who don't wait. I'd be resistant too if I had stomach problems. I don't think you're a coward. I think your reaction is normal.
You're not a coward, that kind of reaction is perfectly reasonable, especially in your situation.
I got my SN in 2023. In my case, I guess having a method I knew had high chances to work made me stop and think in a way that trying desperate methods didn't. I thought a lot about what CTB meant to me and whether it was the right time for me to do it. Then a combination of factors like getting a better job and having a more successful career stalled me.
I can't speak for everyone who gets their SN and decided not to go through with it right away. I'd say in my case I just happened to get it during a transitional period in my life where things started to get legitimately better. I still keep my box to this day, safely stored for when I decide it's time. Having it makes me feel safer, even. And knowing I have a reliable way to end myself in my own house kinda changed my outlook in life.
I don't think so. Where I live, I can buy 1 kg of SN whenever I want, and I haven't yet because I'm really afraid it will hurt and that I won't die so even if I had SN in my hands right now, I'd wait until I'm sure before ctb. Not wanting to suffer isn't being a coward, it's just how our mind works.
I think most people keep it to a "just in case" scenario.
It's better to have it near you so you can free yourself from this existence if things get too bad.
At least it's what I think. I didn't have SN yet because I'm concerned people around me can find it, or even worse, some kid could find it and try to lick/ingest idk.
i finally found the website and i was like "hmm, wait. should i wait to buy it?" but i was thinking of getting it anyways and keeping it just in case. i gave myself 2026 to either see if it gets better or i give up. i'm also worried the distributor is gonna stop sending it bc of all the press and stuff so it might be good to get it now while i can just in case. it's like everyday it gets worse, and everyday i ask myself "why am i still alive, why can't it be easy to die?" and it's not like SN is easy either.
I'd like to preface this to hopefully help people not make rash decisions due to the fear that their suicide method will go "bad" and they feel forced to take it before they truly want to. Freedom of choice means everything. There is a lot of misconception on here about how long both of these...
sanctioned-suicide.net
Reactions:
Matchaaa
Matchaaa
Please excuse any tone misunderstandings,thank you
I'd like to preface this to hopefully help people not make rash decisions due to the fear that their suicide method will go "bad" and they feel forced to take it before they truly want to. Freedom of choice means everything. There is a lot of misconception on here about how long both of these...
My SN is bagged, and the bag portion is transparent and feels quite thin. On top of that, I live in a place that's consistently hot and humid. Anyway, thanks for your reply and the information you shared.
I ordered my SN today, and I plan on waiting until the summer around my birthday to give life one last shot. It's my 21st and I plan to spend it with my sister, who's my best friend, who is states away from me. If I truly can't feel any happiness or hope when I'm celebrating my life with the person I love the most, I will be ending my life shortly after.
And just to echo what everyone has said, you aren't a coward. I honestly think it's rarer for people to be 100% sure and icy cold in their resolve. I mean, a calming drug is common procedure for that reason. Don't rush friend, I hope life shows you a path less grim than this one, but either way I hope you can find peace.
I finished getting my kit together (ae, benzos, sn, scale, etc) at the end of december 2025 and I haven't used it yet. I look and contemplate pretty often, but I'm waiting for things to get truly miserable (again) before I pull the metaphorical trigger. I would've used it as soon as I got it but USPS took too long to deliver and I wasn't feeling it anymore by the time the sn arrived
Nope. I've had mine for many years now alongside backup methods. It provides an immense sense of relief and comfort to have it and actually helps me to live knowing I can leave at any time I want to.
I'm going to order mine but I am concerned I may impulsively take it.
I have a medical condition which is very unpleasant. I take medication 5 times a day but waking up and waiting for the first dose to kick in is pretty difficult.
I'm ready to go but I wouldn't just want to take it and then have no control over the circumstances which I am discovered. I'd much rather clean the house, clear my browser history and have a good idea of who will find me.
i think the minority of people are acting straight on it.
another part is planning it and do it when they feel like it.
and the 3rd group is just living. but having option to go when they want is already enough for them
Bought mine in early Oct. last year. All I did was check the package. Sometimes, I put it on my lap and contemplate my my death, staring at it blankly. My lack of will and excessive procrastination are the two main factors at play in my case. For some unknown reason I'm an awful perfectionist when it comes to finally doing it.
You certainly aren't a coward. This is not something that can be handled or acted on lightly, at least IMHO.
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jaysthreecents, Matchaaa and Aflame5926
I got it for when my pain worsens or I get more fnd issues. I also need to take care of some things before I can escape this dysfunctional world. I seriously hope reincarnation won't happen
i bought mine in july 2025, ended up not using it right away then a few days later my mom found it lmao. In retrospect considering how much worse my life got since then I should've used it at that time. now I am thinking of ordering SN again.
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