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thelazybones

thelazybones

Member
Aug 20, 2023
23
if all goes to plan I should be gone within a week. i have a plan and a backup - I've been practicing hyperventilating for my backup (shallow water) and i think it will truly happen

i feel so strange . im seeing lots of old friends in a few days and so it seems fitting . my final goodbye to them.

i feel like I will be very active on here in the next few days. i usually don't post as much, but it's really helping me come to terms with everything by posting about it all

the most painful thing will be pretending to my partner that everything is okay. they don't know and it will destroy them - but they are perfect in every way and i know that they will find someone to help and love them, just as i do. I'm trying not to act suspicious. I've been crying on and off and they caught me and I'm a bit scared they're going to catch on that something is happening (extremely unlikely but I don't want to worry them)

i won't see my younger sibling grow up, and that hurts so much. but i am not a great role model and they're young enough that me disappearing won't be overly awful. life is wild. i am so so scared. im terrified, but i want it to happen. im scared of the pain but it's temporary. I'm also scared that in the last second I will want to pull away and stop, and that I can't. but I know that will just be the SI .


sorry for the long ramble.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
43,682
I wish you the best of luck in your plans, I hope that you find the freedom you search for.
 
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not-2-b-the-answer

not-2-b-the-answer

Archangel
Mar 23, 2018
10,557
Wishing you the best when the time comes. ♥️🤗♥️🤗♥️
 
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Dliena

Dliena

𝚂𝚂 𝙼𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛 𝙽𝚘. 43,53?
Dec 22, 2023
1,888
I hope that you'll be able to find the sweet peace that you desire OP.
 
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