I want to go asap

[liberty_222]

I honestly can't hold on anymore... I fucking hate everyone I'm so fucking lonely

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand it is hard to carry on when you are suffering so much. Living is very painful. I hope you find peace.

 

[Suicidebydeath]

Loneliness is a slow and painful way to go. I hope you find peace too.

 

[liberty_222]

Someone talk to me... I'll go crazy

 

[healthrecovery]

Don't know i think there are worse things than being lonely iv'e been completely alone for over 10 years and before that i was alone most of the time. You need to find a passion in life if you don't have it you must search for it or stumble upon it. Some people get obsessed about gardening which is quite fun...some people honeslty are passionate about playing video games....you need to find something that make you less lonely...maybe working with animals idk...traveling.

The only ways i got out of loneliness is by doing something....when you are depressed its often really difficult to get out of it tho. Woman also are more social and emotional creaturees than men and loneliness often hits them harder

 

[Flying Away]

Someone talk to me... I'll go crazy

You can DM if you would like

 

[liberty_222]

Don't know i think there are worse things than being lonely iv'e been completely alone for over 10 years and before that i was alone most of the time. You need to find a passion in life if you don't have it you must search for it or stumble upon it. Some people get obsessed about gardening which is quite fun...some people honeslty are passionate about playing video games....you need to find something that make you less lonely...maybe working with animals idk...traveling.

The only ways i got out of loneliness is by doing something....when you are depressed its often really difficult to get out of it tho. Woman also are more social and emotional creaturees than men and loneliness often hits them harder

I feel lonely because i feel isolated and that everyone is against me. My mental illness makes me crave affection and attention yet come off as manipulative and toxic. I hate it here. People are blocking me for no Fucking fault of mine. I just want to die oh my god i just want to fucking die i can't do this anymore.

 

[Flying Away]

I feel lonely because i feel isolated and that everyone is against me. My mental illness makes me crave affection and attention yet come off as manipulative and toxic. I hate it here. People are blocking me for no Fucking fault of mine. I just want to die oh my god i just want to fucking die i can't do this anymore.

I can relate to this.

 

[liberty_222]

Oh my god i just lay down trying to imagine and feel the symptom I'd feel after taking sn, the heartbeat getting fast, the fear, the shortness of breath, dizziness, nausea...
It scared me realising I'll need to endure around 10-15 minutes of this before i pass out or maybe even more

 

[Elri]

Oh my god i just lay down trying to imagine and feel the symptom I'd feel after taking sn, the heartbeat getting fast, the fear, the shortness of breath, dizziness, nausea...
It scared me realising I'll need to endure around 10-15 minutes of this before i pass out or maybe even more

I had a SN test and it wasn't bad at all kind of peaceful also as my skin went pale i felt like a beautiful corpse lmao idk

 

[forgotten15]

I am sorry you are suffering so much. I know the pain of loneliness very well. It can shatter you.

 

[liberty_222]

I had a SN test and it wasn't bad at all kind of peaceful also as my skin went pale i felt like a beautiful corpse lmao idk

Sweetie did you take anything except the 2g sn?

 

[Elri]

Sweetie did you take anything except the 2g sn?

No cause it was a rational decision it took a few minutes to kick in and i had food beforehand, i vomited it all 7 minutes after , it wasn't planned at all otherwise i would be dead now

 

[liberty_222]

What symptoms did you feel? Since our weight is similar i wonder if taking all the precautions and taking 10-15gm instead of 25 would make ctb more peaceful?

 

[Elri]

What symptoms did you feel? Since our weight is similar i wonder if taking all the precautions and taking 10-15gm instead of 25 would make ctb more peaceful?

I wouldn't risk go lower even tho it might be more peaceful which i doubt cause you will pass out soon anyways, I've seen news of people being saved after ingesting 16grams, but i think 20g is fine

 

[liberty_222]

I was going through the ppeh and it definitely makes me feel beta blocker is essential

 

[ShaiOne007]

Someone talk to me... I'll go crazy

I'm around if you'd ever like to talk. I'm looking to feel less alone too :/

 

[bakednborderline]

I feel lonely because i feel isolated and that everyone is against me. My mental illness makes me crave affection and attention yet come off as manipulative and toxic. I hate it here. People are blocking me for no Fucking fault of mine. I just want to die oh my god i just want to fucking die i can't do this anymore.

i wanted to say i too struggle with the craving affection & attention & coming off toxic. i dont think i have a message feature on here. but if youre still here i'mhere for you. i'm sorry youre feeling this way. i am so lonely too.

 

[tieiwi]

I feel lonely because i feel isolated and that everyone is against me. My mental illness makes me crave affection and attention yet come off as manipulative and toxic. I hate it here. People are blocking me for no Fucking fault of mine. I just want to die oh my god i just want to fucking die i can't do this anymore.

I relate to you so much and I'm so sorry. I know how this feels. I act like a bitch when in reality all I want is someone to care and pay attention to me. I saw you were posting about using SN and that's the method I'm going to use. I was thinking about timing things so that I could take a sleeping pill beforehand. If it makes you feel any better I read a thread from one user (I can't find the link or anything I'm so sorry) they did a taste test of SN and died of it. They weren't planning of going at that time but they said it really was the most peaceful method.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

Same here I want to go asap. I have everything ready. It is just picking a day. I hope I can catch the right moment when I feel extra suicidal. That will be the right time to strike. I might not get another chance to ctb so this has to be done right.

 

[liberty_222]

I'm going out today. Will bribe chemists into selling me the beta blocker and benzo

 

[Komm_Süsser_Tod]

I'm going out today. Will bribe chemists into selling me the beta blocker and benzo

I hope you find peace and I relate to a lot of what you're saying. I had a friend block me for no reason too... We knew each other for almost two years.

 

[CrossroadsCurious]

I'm going out today. Will bribe chemists into selling me the beta blocker and benzo

From one human being to another... I'm sorry that you suffered and for the pain you had to endure. I hope you find the peace you need and are seeking.

 

[blueclover_.]

The only ways i got out of loneliness is by doing something....when you are depressed its often really difficult to get out of it tho. Woman also are more social and emotional creaturees than men and loneliness often hits them harder

Most women are more emotional than men because that's how society expects them to be. Society would laugh at a crying man. Society would scoff at an ambitious career woman. I am a woman, i have nobody and i don't care. The sole reason i want to ctb is because of financial insecurity.

Your personality is not determined by your penis or vagina. Such a Boomer way to think.

 

[liberty_222]

Guys i did it...i met that old man got drunk and did it...i lost my virginity and i hated all of it... But i got 10k in cash (INR)

 

[liberty_222]

GUYS I BOUGHT THE PROPRANOLOL AND ONDASENTRON. I didn't buy the sedative.
I'm planning on going exactly according to the ppeh. I have all the things i need except SN. I'll use a simple antacid instead of tagamet or something. Ordering my sn right now. This suffering ends soon inshallah.

 

[Elri]

GUYS I BOUGHT THE PROPRANOLOL AND ONDASENTRON. I didn't buy the sedative.
I'm planning on going exactly according to the ppeh. I have all the things i need except SN. I'll use a simple antacid instead of tagamet or something. Ordering my sn right now. This suffering ends soon inshallah.

See you on the other side very soon

 

[Suicidebydeath]

See you on the other side very soon

I hope you both can find each other and peace.