I burst out in tears and couldn't do it.. I want to but I'm so afraid. I slept all day in my bed afterwards and put the N back in the bottles with a funnel and closed them with the rubber cap.
Then I hear the doorbell going several times but I ignored it, I wanted to keep laying in bed. Then when I go down to get some food I see a card in the mail that the mailman missed me and there's a package at the neighbours.
But I didn't order anything I think to myself. I go to the neighbours and ask for my package, he gives it to me and it looks exactly like the N package I got last Tuesday. So I open it up, and yup, another two bottles. I guess A made a mistake and sent me another two bottles.
Also I am not gonna log my attempts here anymore, it feels stupid when I don't go through with it. I am sorry.