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Annabella

Annabella

Member
Jan 13, 2021
25
18M Before you think it is a tumor, you should know that the I've done MRI scans and there is nothing wrong there.

Hello! I am suffering from something that seems pretty rare.

It all started 3 years ago when I felt a really weird sensation in the right side of my head, it was almost like the sensation people feel when they are falling but inside the right side of my head. It was a physical sensation. Afterwards I observed that I couldn't feel emotions as strongly, almost like they were under a veil of sorts. Another interesting thing that I observed is that most activities that are supposed to bring me pleasure hurt me considerably and make me number. (in general any type of sexual pleasure, sugar, alcohol etc). It's almost like anything pleasurable hurts that side of my brain and worsens my condition considerably. I am 100% that there is something neurologicaly wrong with me.

With time my "condition" got worse and worse In such a wah way that I always feel a hellish pressure in the right side of my brain, constantly. Not only this, but it deeply affects my ability to think.
When I tried to remember what I've done 3 days ago that pressure in the right side of my head got so badly it entirely covered the right side of my brain and it made it so much harder for me to think. Not only this but it felt like my right ear was filled with water too. When I think it always feels like the "voice" from inside my head doesn't reach that right side of my head anymore,but in that right moment it was almost like my entire head got paralyzed, I was so afraid. There is no point in living anymore. I've never met anyone that has something like this ever before. Can please a doctor/someone that has ever heard of such a condition tell me what is wrong with me? Please please don't tell me to go to a medic to shut me off If you don't know what it may be then please keep it to yourself. It's just a way of shutting off the conversation.


I know that It will probably never truly heal, but at least I want to find a way to "connect" with that side of the brain once again at least. And I want the pressure to stop, I'm always afraid it will get worse. Please help me. I don't even mind being emotionless anymore, I just want the pain in the right side of the head to stop. English is not my native language, sorry for errors.
If you can't help me heal, at least help me end my suffering. Please please please :(
 
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greyhound

greyhound

Arcanist
Oct 8, 2020
471
Chronic infections can definitely cause those kinds of symptoms. The fact that sugar and alcohol worsens it also would make me suspect an infection. Most doctors aren't really aware of chronic neurological infections. You could try taking some antibiotics that cross the blood brain barrier and see if you notice any change. If you kill something the symptoms will worsen in the short term. Topical essential oils would also be a good test. If your symptoms worsen then probably some kind of infection in the brain.
 
clown_17

clown_17

Almost gone, it almost worked
Oct 24, 2020
288
From what you're describing I think I have a similar condition. It all started a year ago when I felt a physical "split" in my mind. I felt like two states that normally coexisted were now gone. I think it was a sort of mental blockage my brain made to protect me. I could only ever lean to one state all feelings, or all thoughts. When I was all feeling I couldn't think coherently. When I was all thoughts I couldn't feel any emotions. It's been a year and it hasn't gotten better but I'm pretty sure it's psychiatric for my case at least. I think it's like a mental protection sorta things. When I tried to force them to work together I got pain in my head. Only thing that has worked for me is doing only things that stop the pain, aka staying inside, talking to no one, not engaging in complex tasks. It sucks but that's all that's worked for me
 
Annabella

Annabella

Member
Jan 13, 2021
25
From what you're describing I think I have a similar condition. It all started a year ago when I felt a physical "split" in my mind. I felt like two states that normally coexisted were now gone. I think it was a sort of mental blockage my brain made to protect me. I could only ever lean to one state all feelings, or all thoughts. When I was all feeling I couldn't think coherently. When I was all thoughts I couldn't feel any emotions. It's been a year and it hasn't gotten better but I'm pretty sure it's psychiatric for my case at least. I think it's like a mental protection sorta things. When I tried to force them to work together I got pain in my head. Only thing that has worked for me is doing only things that stop the pain, aka staying inside, talking to no one, not engaging in complex tasks. It sucks but that's all that's worked for me
In my case i observed that' staying outside and reading helps me. I'm wondering something :is this split feeling you experience something that could cause bipolar if worsened(after something traumatic) ?
I don't think you have bipolar right now, but it's said that those people have a period in which their emotions are super strong and another in which they can't feel anymore.

BTW i recommend you to DONT make a lot of excessive physical activity, try to keep it low and try to avoid activities that strain your brain(crying, emotional pain, maybe even masturbation). In my case at least physical activity WORSENED my state a lot. I think there exists this fairly thin barrier between psychiatry and neurology, this is where we have our problem. Btw this doesn't mean that you shouldn't do some physical exercise, intelectual effort, the brain probably needs that to heal, but don't force yourself over your limits.
 
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clown_17

clown_17

Almost gone, it almost worked
Oct 24, 2020
288
In my case i observed that' staying outside and reading helps me. I'm wondering something :is this split feeling you experience something that could cause bipolar if worsened(after something traumatic) ?
I don't think you have bipolar right now, but it's said that those people have a period in which their emotions are super strong and another in which they can't feel anymore.

BTW i recommend you to DONT make a lot of excessive physical activity, try to keep it low and try to avoid activities that strain your brain(crying, emotional pain, maybe even masturbation). In my case at least physical activity WORSENED my state a lot. I think there exists this fairly thin barrier between psychiatry and neurology, this is where we have our problem. Btw this doesn't mean that you shouldn't do some physical exercise, intelectual effort, the brain probably needs that to heal, but don't force yourself over your limits.
I don't think it's like bipolar. I think it's like an emotional blockage to prevent me from feeling extreme pain, because I'm rarely in the all feeling zone, and when I am it's because a memory or flashback was triggered. Yeah, high intensity exercise makes it much worse. Anything that gets my heart rate up sucks, although small walks help personally. I do agree that psychiatry and neurology cross a lot. The worst thing is that this kind of thing doesn't seem to be that common, because I've gotten so many misdiagnosis and no actual treatment that's helped. I'm just learning to get used to it now.
 
Chancerator

Chancerator

Member
Dec 30, 2020
23
18M Before you think it is a tumor, you should know that the I've done MRI scans and there is nothing wrong there.

Hello! I am suffering from something that seems pretty rare.

It all started 3 years ago when I felt a really weird sensation in the right side of my head, it was almost like the sensation people feel when they are falling but inside the right side of my head. It was a physical sensation. Afterwards I observed that I couldn't feel emotions as strongly, almost like they were under a veil of sorts. Another interesting thing that I observed is that most activities that are supposed to bring me pleasure hurt me considerably and make me number. (in general any type of sexual pleasure, sugar, alcohol etc). It's almost like anything pleasurable hurts that side of my brain and worsens my condition considerably. I am 100% that there is something neurologicaly wrong with me.

With time my "condition" got worse and worse In such a wah way that I always feel a hellish pressure in the right side of my brain, constantly. Not only this, but it deeply affects my ability to think.
When I tried to remember what I've done 3 days ago that pressure in the right side of my head got so badly it entirely covered the right side of my brain and it made it so much harder for me to think. Not only this but it felt like my right ear was filled with water too. When I think it always feels like the "voice" from inside my head doesn't reach that right side of my head anymore,but in that right moment it was almost like my entire head got paralyzed, I was so afraid. There is no point in living anymore. I've never met anyone that has something like this ever before. Can please a doctor/someone that has ever heard of such a condition tell me what is wrong with me? Please please don't tell me to go to a medic to shut me off If you don't know what it may be then please keep it to yourself. It's just a way of shutting off the conversation.


I know that It will probably never truly heal, but at least I want to find a way to "connect" with that side of the brain once again at least. And I want the pressure to stop, I'm always afraid it will get worse. Please help me. I don't even mind being emotionless anymore, I just want the pain in the right side of the head to stop. English is not my native language, sorry for errors.
If you can't help me heal, at least help me end my suffering. Please please please :(
Oh, I wish that I had a concrete answer for you! I'm not a doctor, so I can't say what is causing your pain. I do, however, want to tell you a story that might help:

Last year, I underwent an appendectomy at one of the best hospitals in the US. The surgery seemed to go great. Doctors closed me up and said that I was cured of my faulty appendix. Two days after the surgery, however, I was beset by the worst physical pain I've ever experienced in my life. I went to an emergency room that was attached to the same 'amazing' hospital where I'd undergone surgery. The doctors took some CT scans and concluded that I was 'just constipated.' Meanwhile, I was in a blinding amount of pain. The morphine that I received at the hospital did nothing to help my cause, but the doctors sent me home regardless. A few hours later, I went back to the emergency room. It was the same old story. The doctors told me that I was 'constipated.' They gave me more morphine and sent me on my way. When I went to the hospital for a THIRD time, the doctors finally realized that I had a hole in my intestine from the appendectomy. The doctors had SERIOUSLY misdiagnosed me, allowing shit and bacteria to spill into my visceral cavity for more than a day. Again, these were doctors at one of the 'best' hospitals in the US...and they misdiagnosed me while looking at the CT scans of my body.

Here's my point: If you feel that something is wrong inside your brain/body, stop at nothing to get it diagnosed. Get second opinions. Get third options. Get sixth and seventh opinions. Doctors want us to think that they are gods, but they are fallible humans (just like the rest of us). I sincerely hope that you find a few doctors who will listen to you. Trust your brain. Trust your gut. I pray that you find some peace.
 
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