dynastickitten

dynastickitten

Member
Jan 12, 2024
56
Keep getting locked into a mentality of doom and gloom. My long distance girlfriend just went home and I know I'm gonna get worse. Already wanna lay face down and just sleep the rest of the day away in complete solitude.

I'm gonna force myself to go out and go sledding with my buddies instead. I'm gonna help them cook dinner. I have to do something. I have to at least try
 
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UsagiDrop

UsagiDrop

“What a beautiful day to haunt the earth.”
Apr 27, 2023
299
I'm proud of you if you've managed to do it. And if you have not, if you spent the day sleeping instead, I'm proud of you for having the thought to try. I hope you will give hanging out with them a try another day.

It's really hard to reach out to people when we are depressed and suicidal. Even among those closest to us, we tend to feel like imposters, something like aliens or maybe even shapeshifters. We are experiencing something that most of the people around us do not and should not understand, so when we are with them, it's easy to not feel human. It's easy to isolate and say that people are better off without us. I'm happy that it seems you recognize the love that you have around you and that you're fighting for them. I hope you'll allow them to help you! If you spent time with your friends today, I also hope you had a great time that didn't include any doom and gloom at all.
 
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dynastickitten

dynastickitten

Member
Jan 12, 2024
56
I'm proud of you if you've managed to do it. And if you have not, if you spent the day sleeping instead, I'm proud of you for having the thought to try. I hope you will give hanging out with them a try another day.

It's really hard to reach out to people when we are depressed and suicidal. Even among those closest to us, we tend to feel like imposters, something like aliens or maybe even shapeshifters. We are experiencing something that most of the people around us do not and should not understand, so when we are with them, it's easy to not feel human. It's easy to isolate and say that people are better off without us. I'm happy that it seems you recognize the love that you have around you and that you're fighting for them. I hope you'll allow them to help you! If you spent time with your friends today, I also hope you had a great time that didn't include any doom and gloom at all.
Whenever I start feeling down, I seem to develop this mental block when it comes to interacting with the people around me. It's like my throat becomes plugged and I'm paralyzed. Can't ask anyone for anything and can't get myself up to seek it out physically. Which is silly, because I live with one of my best friends. She's no more than ten feet away at any given moment.

I think my very brain is working against me. I KNOW the people closest to me enjoy having me around, I know I can talk to whomever I want, whenever I want to with good reception. I always feel better after I do. Yet there seems to be no carryover with these experiences. It's like my brain just forgets how good it felt the last time.

I've learned to just do it anyway, even if it's as difficult as pulling out my own fingernails. I can't just lie down and wait to die. I refuse to succumb so easily
 
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