Venting I relapsed on my sh

[Signal]

I have been clean for almost two months now from cutting myself, I even stoped coming to SaSu, not that I have been feeling better this last two months, I have never stopped wanting to hurt myself, I was just trying to stop doing it, even if I still felt miserable, even if I still hated myself, even if I still wanted to die, I wanted to at least stop cutting myself, I don't really know why though. Still, none of that matters now, since I just cut myself again, and it felt so good, the blood running through my arm looked so pretty, I'm ashamed of myself, but I don't really care anymore, I know I'll stay like this until the day I die, my brain just doesn't work anymore.

Anyway, how are you people?

 

[LostZombie]

Aww poor thing I'm so sorry to hear that, I could never understand how strong those urges are. You have nothing to be ashamed of, you did 2 months and I'm impressed with that. You are strong for making that long, and it's okay sh, its not invalid, you have nothing to ashamed of. You just cope differently than others, and that's okay.

 

[Die2night]

Relapsing is part of the journe,y you should be ashamed for trying to better yourself. You shouldn't try to be clean for the sake of being clean, that usually doesn't turn out good.

Urges are strong, it's an addiction (duh) and quitting isn't easy. I've found I can manage urges better by just telling me "I'll do it in 20 minutes", usually those urges go away in said 20 minutes