I really want to make it happen

[jojobanana]

I've had these thoughts for as long as I can remember. I've attempted twice in my life at a young age and of course unsuccessful. I just don't know how to do it. I don't want to try anything that will leave me with a disability if unsuccessful. I don't self harm I just don't feel any pleasure in that. I think because of this mh services and most people don't take me seriously. i just get on with life as i believe if im going to be stuck here i must make the most of things. it's impossible to find a way in the uk. censorship is extreme. i have no idea how to access drugs or chemicals. my home has nowhere to hang from and i don't know anywhere isolated enough to try. i'd like a buddy. that's my wish

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand, I also wish to be gone as well, all I want is to never suffer in this torturous and futile existence ever again and I always suffer so much from how I cannot just have the option to peacefully cease existing with no more suffering so I can finally be free from this existence, I see so much cruelty in how we exist in this reality where the suffering and pain of existing is seen as to force and prolong no matter what with no acceptance towards the personal choice to permanently cease existing, I hope you find peace.