I ordered my SN now I’m so scared but…

[takemenowpls]

ordered my SN today and have been reading up on stans guide. Have to say it's got me pretty shaken up and scared. However, even when reading how it works and what it does… I dunno. I still feel like it's worth it. It truly does not sound like a peaceful way to go just less painful. Truth is none of us really know other then what we have read. I don't know….

 

[Hope:-)]

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling scared. I totally relate. :-/

 

[notocarpediem]

Did you post about taking time out for recovery the other day? If so, what's changed for you?

edit - apologies, that may be a bit too personal a question, but just wondered if you needed an ear to chat through things.

 

[FuneralCry]

SN does sound quite unpleasant from what I have read but still preferable to many other methods. N sounds like the ideal method to me. Of course it's reliable as many people have died from it. I think that those who have SN are lucky as I think that drinking a poison would be easier than methods like hanging and jumping.

 

[takemenowpls]

Yes I thought I was in recovery. It was all a lie. I was lying to myself thinking I could do it. Life is just so complicated and disastrous right now more came down the pipe I wasn't ready for. It's never ending. I have to leave this world and soon. I'm just really scared.

 

[Joeydoe]

Yes I thought I was in recovery. It was all a lie. I was lying to myself thinking I could do it. Life is just so complicated and disastrous right now more came down the pipe I wasn't ready for. It's never ending. I have to leave this world and soon. I'm just really scared.

It's definitely scary, the thought of dying, even for those of us who thought we had genuinely come to terms with it, who have cried out to God between breaths, as we gasped for air as we sobbed, begging him for an end. I knew all along, though, that I God, in fact, had predispositioned me with what I was wishing for, be it in the form of a firearm, or a length of rope, or what have you. However, that was not the answer I wanted. What I really wanted was for God to make me never to have existed. Beg as I might, that prayer was not to be answered. Next in line, was for God to just stop my heart, or to just go to sleep and not wake up. That way, we wouldn't necessarily know we were dying. We wouldn't have to anticipate it, wait for it, plan it, prepare for it, or see it coming. Now, as I sit, holding in my hands the solution to every problem I've ever had, thought I had, or imagined I might have in the future, I'm finding myself hesitating. "I can't do it today, because my brother called yesterday needing me." "Not today, another person I care about is having terrible with xyz, and I'm the only one who can help." "Not today, because I'm supposed to fast, but I was really hungry so I broke down and ate." "OK, today's the day, no more excuses and delays..." As it turns out, it's harder than I thought it was going to be. I can't get over this feeling that there's no good way or right time, to say goodbye, even taking into account that there's, literally, two, yes, two, people I feel bad about leaving. So then I catch myself thinking I could do it if I had company, someone to hang out with me, sit with me, while I do it. As unprobable as that is, would that even suffice to render me "ready?" This is a new, unpredicted feeling that I must now somehow come to terms with. But it's also just another problem that's popped up, one that will also be solved just as soon as I'm "ready." If you're like me, you're extremely short of time. The only method readily available to me and which I am currently able to procure, and which is remotely acceptable, is SN. Some say it might not be a pretty as PN in the PPH would have us believe. However, I find guns too violent, I'm deathly afraid of heights, too chicken to hang or strangulate myself. And dying in any way is going to be uncomfortable, regardless

ordered my SN today and have been reading up on stans guide. Have to say it's got me pretty shaken up and scared. However, even when reading how it works and what it does… I dunno. I still feel like it's worth it. It truly does not sound like a peaceful way to go just less painful. Truth is none of us really know other then what we have read. I don't know….

So, the ultimate question is, if I'm brave enough to consider staying alive, with all the problems and worries and troubles facing me for the rest of my life, am I not brave enough to tolerate a couple or a few hours of "discomfort" in order to, finally, be free?

 

[paleperson]

imo its starting to get hard to purchase sn at all so good to get some before it becomes impossible

 

[LaVieEnRose]

So, the ultimate question is, if I'm brave enough to consider staying alive, with all the problems and worries and troubles facing me for the rest of my life, am I not brave enough to tolerate a couple or a few hours of "discomfort" in order to, finally, be free?

On paper the calculus is simple and obvious: half an hour of suffering is preferable to decsdes' worth of it. In practice it's not that easy.

 

[Jimblue]

I have to say that I am scared of SN too. 30 minutes suffering is a bit too long for me. I am still looking for something more peaceful.

 

[brokensea]

If you're feeling scared you can always give yourself some time until you feel ready. It's a big decision.

 

[👁️👃👁️]

This is a new account I have an old one, I've only been here since January but I can tell you I've read through hundreds and hundreds of posts about SN and I've even spoken to several different people who have survived. 9 out of 10 of those people that I spoke to said that it was not painful and that they did not suffer. There have been a few that said it was painful, for usually when you start to ask them more questions you'll come to notice that they didn't follow the guide.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

This is a new account I have an old one, I've only been here since January but I can tell you I've read through hundreds and hundreds of posts about SN and I've even spoken to several different people who have survived. 9 out of 10 of those people that I spoke to said that it was not painful and that they did not suffer. There have been a few that said it was painful, for usually when you start to ask them more questions you'll come to notice that they didn't follow the guide.

Totally agree. Been here 3 years . Seen hundreds of SN goodbye threads and survivor threads. imo they all said painless. Also peaceful Pill observed many SN cases and all peaceful. Only recently some imo pro-life posts said SN painfull now everyone thinks it's painfull.

I've had pain so bad i couldn't get up much less type or post anything not from SN but from diseases and this evil thing called life

 

[👁️👃👁️]

Totally agree. Been here 3 years . Seen hundreds of SN goodbye threads and survivor threads. imo they all said painless. Also peaceful Pill observed many SN cases and all peaceful. Only recently some imo pro-life posts said SN painfull now everyone thinks it's painfull.

I've had pain so bad i couldn't get up much less type or post anything not from SN but from diseases and this evil thing called life

Yeah I'm also noticed that a lot of these newer accounts are also mentioning intense suffering and extremely painful in all of this stuff. So now a lot of people are starting to believe that.

 

[brokensea]

This is a new account I have an old one, I've only been here since January but I can tell you I've read through hundreds and hundreds of posts about SN and I've even spoken to several different people who have survived. 9 out of 10 of those people that I spoke to said that it was not painful and that they did not suffer. There have been a few that said it was painful, for usually when you start to ask them more questions you'll come to notice that they didn't follow the guide.

Isn't 1 less painful and 10 the most painful? Why does it say SN is 7 on painful death scale some places. Shouldn't it be lower than that?

 

[👁️👃👁️]

Isn't 1 less painful and 10 the most painful? Why does it say SN is 7 on painful death scale some places. Shouldn't it be lower than that?

The scale is 1 out of 10 for peacefulness.

 

[reverse03]

Can someone please private message me where can I get sn? I am from Canada and needed it really badly.

 

[k1w1]

Dear folks.....why the heck not just stock up on fast acting benzos??? Im out like a light after 6mgs Klonopin....just a matter of timing it no?.

 

[literallydonee]

Dear folks.....why the heck not just stock up on fast acting benzos??? Im out like a light after 6mgs Klonopin....just a matter of timing it no?.

you can't pass from benzos alone, its very rare. look it up. has to be combined with opiates and/or alcohol, and even then death is not certain and you can have permanent brain damage.

 

[Joeydoe]

I had an anxiety induced seizure, and still can't get clonopin.

Dear folks.....why the heck not just stock up on fast acting benzos??? Im out like a light after 6mgs Klonopin....just a matter of timing it no?

 

[k1w1]

you can't pass from benzos alone, its very rare. look it up. has to be combined with opiates and/or alcohol, and even then death is not certain and you can have permanent brain damage.

You are correct. I intended it to be taken within the context of the topic of this post. Thanks

 

[makethepainstop]

To be relieved of this most painful and burdensome thing known as life, I will happily suffer some discomfort. However, I do have a very high tolerance for pain, and to insure a comfortable final exit I am going to use some wonderful THC gummies to ease the transition. I will have got my bus ticket, SN! Peace and love to all here.