
Qua
there's no turning back now
- Apr 30, 2023
- 77
Family problems been there my whole life. Family problems affect me greatly and I can't do anything but watch and listen to the fight, watch and listen adults acting like kids. Why do you have children? Why did you decide to have children?
Lately I found out, after 4 years of hiding it from me, that my mom's partner (that we've been living with for 4 years) is being currently looked for by the police and my mom has been pretending to not be in touch with him when in court. He won't do anything to help himself, get a lawyer. He realizes that he's hurting us by not doing anything, but he's not willing to do anything. I'm breaking down, I'm scared for my life. I'm 18 so if shit goes down I'm going to be by myself, court won't take me into an account as, oh we should take care of her she's a child, because legally I'm not. But I am, I am a kid that needs parents, that needs love and support. That needs a house that feels safe.
It's been getting worse. All the problems have been getting worse lately and I feel like I soon won't be able to take it anymore. I'm breaking down, I'm abusing meds and alcohol, trying to find an escape. I'm working out till passing out to let all my anger out. I'm destroying myself more than I have ever did before. I'm loosing it. I can't take it. If it goes on for longer, I won't be here any longer. I will hurt myself in one way or another.
I've been suicidal for many years, but it's never been as bad as it is now. There was one event in my life that completely broke me, but even then I wasn't as low as I am right now. I'm at my all time lowest. I need help, genuine help. I need someone to take care of the problems that my moms partner won't take care of. He's in his 40s but acting like a teenager.
I have a sister, she's 15 years younger than me, soon turning 3. How is she supposed to grow up healthy? She will grow up in a toxic household like I did. She will have trauma like I did. She will have father issues like I do.
I can't take it, I feel like my time is ending, I feel like i'm going insane. It's an endless circle, my 18 years of life have been filled with lies and pain and I can't stay strong anymore. I need help or I'll die
Lately I found out, after 4 years of hiding it from me, that my mom's partner (that we've been living with for 4 years) is being currently looked for by the police and my mom has been pretending to not be in touch with him when in court. He won't do anything to help himself, get a lawyer. He realizes that he's hurting us by not doing anything, but he's not willing to do anything. I'm breaking down, I'm scared for my life. I'm 18 so if shit goes down I'm going to be by myself, court won't take me into an account as, oh we should take care of her she's a child, because legally I'm not. But I am, I am a kid that needs parents, that needs love and support. That needs a house that feels safe.
It's been getting worse. All the problems have been getting worse lately and I feel like I soon won't be able to take it anymore. I'm breaking down, I'm abusing meds and alcohol, trying to find an escape. I'm working out till passing out to let all my anger out. I'm destroying myself more than I have ever did before. I'm loosing it. I can't take it. If it goes on for longer, I won't be here any longer. I will hurt myself in one way or another.
I've been suicidal for many years, but it's never been as bad as it is now. There was one event in my life that completely broke me, but even then I wasn't as low as I am right now. I'm at my all time lowest. I need help, genuine help. I need someone to take care of the problems that my moms partner won't take care of. He's in his 40s but acting like a teenager.
I have a sister, she's 15 years younger than me, soon turning 3. How is she supposed to grow up healthy? She will grow up in a toxic household like I did. She will have trauma like I did. She will have father issues like I do.
I can't take it, I feel like my time is ending, I feel like i'm going insane. It's an endless circle, my 18 years of life have been filled with lies and pain and I can't stay strong anymore. I need help or I'll die