QueSeraSera

QueSeraSera

Trust No One
Sep 13, 2018
73
Thank you and I feel much the same. I've even been told although we can rise above our fates to a degree at least, most of us either don't or can't. I think apparently it was seen as a matter of choice coming down to self-discipline and education, but I have also been told I'm likely too far gone to be savable so to speak. It means a great deal to me though we are strangers that you don't consider me a bad person. I don't know you either but I feel the same for some reason. Thank you and indeed so, and I hope more people will consider antinatalism before bringing children into this world. <3

I am learning that we have to watch who we trust and share our thoughts with. We THINK certain people or doctors care but..they don't. My dopamine and Vit D levels are so low that it's hard to be happy. I cried a few hours ago. Memories and thoughts feel so real....so tears just start to fall.

Why do I need to suffer? Because society says so? Lol. How about they pay my bills first!

And I may be too far gone to save as well.
 
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Regisphilbin_savant

Regisphilbin_savant

Student
Sep 12, 2018
170
I do not allow my psychiatrust to use any means to manipulate me , be it his determination to use prescription s to modify assist vmy behaviors ,or any of his debateble theories to try and alter my train of thought. There is always a counter to set ur own destination as long as u aren't duscouragef by legal social penalties u may incur.
 
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Regisphilbin_savant

Regisphilbin_savant

Student
Sep 12, 2018
170
I am learning that we have to watch who we trust and share our thoughts with. We THINK certain people or doctors care but..they don't. My dopamine and Vit D levels are so low that it's hard to be happy. I cried a few hours ago. Memories and thoughts feel so real....so tears just start to fall.

Why do I need to suffer? Because society says so? Lol. How about they pay my bills first!

And I may be too far gone to save as well.[/QUOTE
I am learning that we have to watch who we trust and share our thoughts with. We THINK certain people or doctors care but..they don't. My dopamine and Vit D levels are so low that it's hard to be happy. I cried a few hours ago. Memories and thoughts feel so real....so tears just start to fall.

Why do I need to suffer? Because society says so? Lol. How about they pay my bills first!

And I may be too far gone to save as well.
 
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QueSeraSera

QueSeraSera

Trust No One
Sep 13, 2018
73
I like it too. You can talk freely here without ruining someone's day or being judged or put in a loony bin. People here understand and even share some feelings. That's nice.

Also - after having been part of quite a few online communities I've noticed that almost all of them are very similar to high school. It's all about cliques and people stroking their own egos and just a whole lot of pretending and shallowness and faking and bullying. You don't really get that here - at least that's my impression. Maybe it's because most of us do not give a fuck anymore. We're done with life so what's the point.

Even more evidence why this place is more therapeutic than most. If people would simply shut the fuck up, be empathetic, and ATTEMPT to make an effort to understand us instead of immediately casting us out...I *might* have had some hope.

But this world is getting worse. And people are so cruel. I just don't have it in me anymore.

I AM BURNED OUT.
 
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Regisphilbin_savant

Regisphilbin_savant

Student
Sep 12, 2018
170
Yogi Berra once infamously said it ain't over till its over so maybe you are never too far gone
 
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Regisphilbin_savant

Regisphilbin_savant

Student
Sep 12, 2018
170
Even more evidence why this place is more therapeutic than most. If people would simply shut the fuck up, be empathetic, and ATTEMPT to make an effort to understand us instead of immediately casting us out...I *might* have had some hope.

But this world is getting worse. And people are so cruel. I just don't have it in me anymore.

I AM BURNED OUT.
If people wound just think a bit first ,not utter predisposed canned shit to you in conversation, and not just respond emotionally so often things would becso much more tolerable
 
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QueSeraSera

QueSeraSera

Trust No One
Sep 13, 2018
73
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QueSeraSera

QueSeraSera

Trust No One
Sep 13, 2018
73
I think that this forum is very helpful to me. In a weird way, I feel less alone and less likely to ctb right away out of caregiver burnout. I see the light at the end of the tunnel, but now I feel that I do not have to hurry towards that light in a state of anxiety and mental pain. I can wait and prepare quietly to ctb, making sure that everything is just right before I do so, making sure that my ctb goes well and that I know what to expect in the process of dying. Does that make sense to you?

YES!!!!!! THIS MAKES SENSE! Omg!

I am waiting until December 2018 because I only want to do this once and accurately. I do not take death lightly; this is a final decision. I am also VERY aware of what may happen after my death regarding copycats. That's why it's important that I do things right.

I am still very anxious because I don't have all of my supplies yet. And I also want to research more to verify the death rate in regards to exit bags.

But...more than anything else, before I die, I want to help others pass on their own terms. That's the least I can do to pay it forward because I know pain hurts...
 
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QueSeraSera

QueSeraSera

Trust No One
Sep 13, 2018
73
This place is certainly unique and special to me. I relate with just about every word you said I think. I feel arrogant saying it (but hey fk it, you are allowed to blow your own trumpet once on a wgile) I have always been awesome at helping other people too. Either with advice or being the most reliable dude I know. My word means a lot to me. Like a lot.
I just can't seem to expend the courtesy I show literally everyone I meet to myself.
I also cache here with the goal of finding out more about the exit bag.

Long story short, welcome. I hope your stay on the site is as pleasant as possible.

We are Wounded-Healers. We help people (believe it or not). I'm noticing suicidal people tend to be sensitive. Instead of killing others we'd kill ourselves first. Maybe we should remain living and the actual bad people should be purged.

And until science finds a permanent cure for mental illness, suicide seems like a relaxing bubble bath.

Our deaths will not be in vain. Here is the tank I am going to buy...save the link:
https://m.cyberweld.com/shielgascyl22.html

 
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QueSeraSera

QueSeraSera

Trust No One
Sep 13, 2018
73
Yogi Berra once infamously said it ain't over till its over so maybe you are never too far gone

True. You're right. I might change my mind. Hence my screen name: Que Sera, Sera "What will be, will be".

But.... This pain .
 
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RM5998

RM5998

Sack of Meat
Sep 3, 2018
2,202
Welcome, and I hope you find your stay here pleasant and comfortable.

It's funny how a pro-choice suicide forum is one of the most compassionate spaces ever.
 
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