Story I just want to feel that feeling one more time

[BurrowFish]

Fainting. Or, almost fainting

Not too long ago, me and my friends were goofing around as per usual. One of my buddies is kinda tough and has a bit of a hard time controlling his strength sometimes. He's a rather new friend so he doesnt know about any of my past ideations or near-attempts. As we were joking around he goes behind me and play-headlocks me, but he actually squeezed my neck. Like i mentioned, hes not the best at controlling his strength. I was gonna tell him to let go because he was squeezing a bit too hard. I couldnt speak. My throat was closed. I felt that stingy feeling in my nose when i'm about to faint (have had a few lovely seconds of silence after getting some blood drawn a few times.) I felt a tension in my head. I could feel myself about to faint. When i realized i couldnt speak, it was horrifying. But as i could feel myself fading in and out, i felt almost peaceful. I've felt this before, as mentioned before, and even though it sucks beforehand, those seconds of silence feel beautiful. I just want a few more seconds of silence. But he let go before i fainted.

Do i want to die, or do i just need to disappear from my conscious for a little while? Thats a rhetorical question, but i still dont know myself.

 

[eggsausagerice]

Do i want to die, or do i just need to disappear from my conscious for a little while?

dying is the only true way to stop being conscious. sleep and drugs are the only alternatives for this. in the new movie backrooms, they show a blood choke and i was thinking about how that's how partial/full suspension is meant to work. it compresses your carotids and you become unable to breathe or speak because of how much pressure is on them. for me personally, i'd rather die than be alive have the ability to phase out of myself, because i know that i would rather never have to be conscious again than be forced to go back. resting never feels like true rest.

 

[Aknu132]

Where can I find this guy so he can hang me too? I'm sorry you're feeling like that @BurrowFish, you must be suffering so much to reach this point.

 

[settling]

thats a reason why im so attracted to death, because its the absence of being in general. its complete slumber.
also, nice duck profile picture.

 

[BurrowFish]

thats a reason why im so attracted to death, because its the absence of being in general. its complete slumber.
also, nice duck profile picture.

Lmao, thank you thank you