The Disqualified
Disqualified as a Human Being
- Feb 4, 2023
- 230
The more I look around and see others the more lonely I feel. The more I talk and interact with others the more lonely I feel afterwards.
Even on this forum, seeing others makes me sad in a way. Everyone is so close, but so far away at the same time. There just seems to be this void between humans. I wish I could connect more with others. I just feel so lonely, and it hurts to say that.
People are so deep, but my connections are so shallow. I just feel uneasy. I wish I could be more genuine with my passions and true beliefs, but I never found a community.
I've been like this my whole life. I don't know why I had to be born like this. My meds have started kicking in more and I feel a bit less anxious and more sociable. I felt better last week, but although I got out of my shell after challenging myself, I still feel lonely. Always.
It doesn't matter that everyone thinks I am a cool guy if no one calls me ever. I spend my weekends alone; I have no one close to me. I try arranging things, but almost no one shows up; I just end up embarassing myself and feeling sad afterwards.
I injured myself, but I know no one cares. I try to take care of my health, but I just feel so crushed by despair and hopelessness.
There is so much I want to do, but can't bring myself to. But now I just want to die.
I just want to die.
I've been feeling like this my whole life. I feel hurt. Not bitter anymore, just hurt and sad. I feel horrible.
I hope whoever is reading this has a better day than mine. Things are just so tough.
Apologies to everyone that sent me private messages. I haven't responded to them yet because I was overwhelmed at the time they were sent, and I only came back now.
Even on this forum, seeing others makes me sad in a way. Everyone is so close, but so far away at the same time. There just seems to be this void between humans. I wish I could connect more with others. I just feel so lonely, and it hurts to say that.
People are so deep, but my connections are so shallow. I just feel uneasy. I wish I could be more genuine with my passions and true beliefs, but I never found a community.
I've been like this my whole life. I don't know why I had to be born like this. My meds have started kicking in more and I feel a bit less anxious and more sociable. I felt better last week, but although I got out of my shell after challenging myself, I still feel lonely. Always.
It doesn't matter that everyone thinks I am a cool guy if no one calls me ever. I spend my weekends alone; I have no one close to me. I try arranging things, but almost no one shows up; I just end up embarassing myself and feeling sad afterwards.
I injured myself, but I know no one cares. I try to take care of my health, but I just feel so crushed by despair and hopelessness.
There is so much I want to do, but can't bring myself to. But now I just want to die.
I just want to die.
I've been feeling like this my whole life. I feel hurt. Not bitter anymore, just hurt and sad. I feel horrible.
I hope whoever is reading this has a better day than mine. Things are just so tough.
Apologies to everyone that sent me private messages. I haven't responded to them yet because I was overwhelmed at the time they were sent, and I only came back now.
