Venting I have no reason for being this way??

[rabbitlettuce]

This is just a rant tbh, sorry for any grammatical mistakes. I'm a horrible writer lol.

My whole life, i've never had a reason for being depressed or suicidal. Nothing super traumatic ever happened to me growing up. I grew up in a nice, middle class family (with the typical struggles of a black kid in the south ofc). But ever since I was a child, I've always remembered being depressed and having suicidal thoughts. Before, I kept living out of denial and Anger( of what? Later), but for the past few years, I've just been empty and in pain. Because of this, I see no reason to be alive. What's the point of reaching out for help in a system that doesn't care. Especially for people like me, who have no apparent reason for being this way.

Anyways, this is my first post here. Though I've been a lurker for a few months. Sorry for my thoughts being all over the place. But nice to meet you all! I'm 20f and I like anime :D

 

[scarecrowbubu]

Welcome to the family hope you enjoy your stay. I understand how you feel. I'm sorry to hear you reached this point. Sadly we are all on our own it seems but here I'm sure you'll find another world where everyone understands each other. Hope you may find all the help you need and find a solution for your situation. Wish you the best.❤

 

[rabbitlettuce]

Welcome to the family hope you enjoy your stay. I understand how you feel. I'm sorry to hear you reached this point. Sadly we are all on our own it seems but here I'm sure you'll find another world where everyone understands each other. Hope you may find all the help you need and find a solution for your situation. Wish you the best.❤

Thank you<33

 

[scarecrowbubu]

Thank you<33

You are welcome!

 

[hellispink]

Did you tried other things before coming to a determination/decision about ending it?

 

[FuneralCry]

I just think that some people aren't meant for existing and it's true that there is no real relief from suffering in this world, of course there is too much pain in existing. I think that someone doesn't always need a reason for being suicidal, I just believe that not existing is the preferable option for many people.

 

[macrocosm]

This is just a rant tbh, sorry for any grammatical mistakes. I'm a horrible writer lol.

My whole life, i've never had a reason for being depressed or suicidal. Nothing super traumatic ever happened to me growing up. I grew up in a nice, middle class family (with the typical struggles of a black kid in the south ofc). But ever since I was a child, I've always remembered being depressed and having suicidal thoughts. Before, I kept living out of denial and Anger( of what? Later), but for the past few years, I've just been empty and in pain. Because of this, I see no reason to be alive. What's the point of reaching out for help in a system that doesn't care. Especially for people like me, who have no apparent reason for being this way.

Anyways, this is my first post here. Though I've been a lurker for a few months. Sorry for my thoughts being all over the place. But nice to meet you all! I'm 20f and I like anime :D

I'm the same way. Found out it's biological depression, essentially born with it. And it's hereditary.

Ketamine treatment and Sertraline helped.

Ps, If you like anime check out Samurai Champloo