Venting I hate myself

[EmpressDean]

Well today is thanksgiving. My sister got frustrated at me because I can't seem to take initiative at 27 year old to make the ham. I'm confused and scared on how to do it. This is a reminder that I'm incompetent at many things that I should be learning by now.
I really don't have a future. I can't get a job over $15 because I can't study for my life. I have taken a long list of medications just to try to learn to function every day life. Stimulants, non-stimulants, SSRIS, and more. I don't think I'm going to do better and no medication will fix me. I know medication logically can't fix me, but I sure can't do it myself.
I've contemplated on buying a gun but that's messy. So my cleanest method is a charcoal mini grill. I wish I could take a pill.
Or even better, a whole service was made that I can walk into a building, sign a questionnaire, donate my things, get everything set up and just choose a date and it's peaceful for me. No fear.

 

[theboy]

I am sorry you feel this way
I often feel incompetent for doing simple things too.

 

[Insomniac]

Well today is thanksgiving. My sister got frustrated at me because I can't seem to take initiative at 27 year old to make the ham. I'm confused and scared on how to do it. This is a reminder that I'm incompetent at many things that I should be learning by now.
I really don't have a future. I can't get a job over $15 because I can't study for my life. I have taken a long list of medications just to try to learn to function every day life. Stimulants, non-stimulants, SSRIS, and more. I don't think I'm going to do better and no medication will fix me. I know medication logically can't fix me, but I sure can't do it myself.
I've contemplated on buying a gun but that's messy. So my cleanest method is a charcoal mini grill. I wish I could take a pill.
Or even better, a whole service was made that I can walk into a building, sign a questionnaire, donate my things, get everything set up and just choose a date and it's peaceful for me. No fear.

I hope you're feeling a little better :(

 

[FuneralCry]

I do agree that there should be some sort of suicide service like how you described. That is also what I wish for, more than anything. A peaceful straightforward death sounds so ideal to me and we shouldn't have to struggle so much to be free from this life and to finally leave all of the suffering behind. It does sound tiring what you have to endure and your wish to be gone from this world is understandable, it certainly can be awful having to endure an existence that just causes so much dread. I hope that you find what you wish for.

 

[Life_and_Death]

My sister got frustrated at me because I can't seem to take initiative at 27 year old to make the ham. I'm confused and scared on how to do it.

as someone that would love for cooking to be my life, ill tell you that cooking isnt an easy task. its completely understandable why youd feel confused and scared every time that i cook i need to stop and take a deep breath, cooking is highly stressful for anyone. i just wanted you to know that while i understand your sister is probably getting to you, its nothing to be ashamed of